


An Eternal Mystery

by Cheese_kun



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Age Difference, Alternate Universe - Historical, Jealous brothers, M/M, Masturbation, Resolved Sexual Tension, Sibling Incest, Unresolved Sexual Tension
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-09-18
Updated: 2015-01-18
Packaged: 2017-12-26 23:55:52
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 9
Words: 49,449
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/971793
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cheese_kun/pseuds/Cheese_kun
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Frankfurt am Main 1871 - Prussia had won against France and everybody rejoiced. But Eren had no time to party, not when he was summoned to Regensburg in order to meet his half brother. </p><p>Little did he know that their encounter would change both of their lives. A blooming forbidden love in a time of upheaval, inbetween the unification of an empire and the dying dreams of a fairytale king.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Der Erlenkönig mit Kron und Schweif

**Author's Note:**

> Welcome to this baby written with passion and set in the time of Ludwig II, Otto von Bismarck and realist writers like Theodor Fontane. This isn't going to be a history lesson, after all, this is focused on our two lovelies. However, 19th century Germany was very whoooshwhooosh and I'll make sure to constantly remind you of the timestamp for a dash of historical flair.  
> The title of Fürst is generally translated into English as Prince (not the one who's the son of a monarch), but 'Prince Levi' gives me a funny image, so I'll retain the German term.

 

Hesse-Nassau Province of Prussia, Frankfurt am Main.

Eren von Jäger watched the morning happenings with minimal interest, every day provided the same scenario anyway. But it had still become his habit to rest his arms on the window sill while the rest of his body was still halfway sprawled in bed. The second storey of Palais Thurn und Taxis had a good view over the busy streets full of early workers, noisy coaches and colourful flags of black and white. Yes, people were still celebrating the peace treaty of Frankfurt, marking the victory of Prussia over France, which had gained the kingdom Alsace and part of Lorraine. The overall atmosphere was still euphoric. And if Eren were to tilt the window open, he was sure that the scent of freshly baked bread would tickle his nose.

But Eren had no time to revel in the high feeling of victory and enjoy his morning routine of taking in the smells and sounds of the city. A crumpled piece of paper lay abandoned on his pillow, it had come with a seal. Now, Eren knew the letter was the direct consequence of his actions one week ago when he had beaten a Prussian official to a pulp in front of a pub. It was foolish, certainly, but watching the man harass an unwilling woman was not an option. It would have gotten him in big trouble hadn't there been intervention from the main house- and now he was still a free man but subject to gossip.

Compared to the headlines of Prussia's victory over France Eren's scandal was only worth a small column in the papers, but it was still a public matter. _The violent bastard of the Thurn and Taxis nobility, attention seeker and disturbance of public peace_. Eren felt like punching the loose mouth of the one responsible of that article. And now he was more in trouble with the main house rather than the law.

Born as the bastard child of the Fürst von Thurn und Taxis and a woman of low noble rank, his life had never been very dignified. Still, he had been granted a life in the Palais and an allowance although without a rank in the family. Though now it seemed like he was going to lose everything. The little scandal, which had brought up the forgotten stain in the family's image, was probably the last straw that would make them abandon Eren for good. He tried to be apathetic about it but still couldn't shake off the lingering feeling of fear in his gut.

Eren crawled to grab the letter again and read it for the fifth time that morning. The family crest on the wax seal was unmistakably that of the Princely House Thurn and Taxis, it also said that he was summoned to Regensburg, the city of the family's main residence. That could only mean that he was summoned by non other than the Fürst himself, which was bad news.

After his father's death six months ago, his legitimate son, the offspring of a marriage with a Bavarian duchess, became head of the family and the new Fürst von Thurn und Taxis by default. His half brother.

Eren dreaded his first official encounter with Fürst Levi von Thurn und Taxis.

 

 

"Don't you have anything else to bring with you, young master? And any friends you would like to bid goodbye to before we depart?" Asked the coachman who had just finished loading Eren's suitcase.

The one addressed blinked at the middle-aged man with a blank face.

"I don't have to go that far for a brief trip." He shrugged and climbed into the surprisingly comfortable carriage. At least he didn't have to sit on wooden seats for three or four days straight, because he was sure, whatever punishment he would receive from his serene highness could never amount to the butt pain.

The coachman looked at him with doubt plastering his face. "But master, I was told that you were not to return to Frankfurt. At least not in the near future."

Eren stared at him. Nobody had even bothered to give him that important piece of information. What on earth was awaiting him in Regensburg? His offence couldn't have been that bad, now was it? A wave of panicked thoughts flooded his head as he pictured several fatal scenarios regarding his fate with wide eyes and face gone pale. Maybe he was going to be thrown into some kind of a medieval torturing basement. By now he was toying with the idea of jumping out of the carriage in the middle of the journey.

"Young master?" The voice startled him out of his panicked thoughts. "We still have some time. You could still say farewell to your comrades and take some more of your personal belongings."

The young noble's hands were clenched in fists as he shook his head. "I don't have any...friends to say goodbye to. And I won't miss anything, my essentials are already packed anyway. I don't mind going now."

It was true. Eren wasn't only a bastard child deserted by the family of high status, he was also a loner in the social department. He liked to blame it on his position as an illegitimate child, however in truth he simply wasn't a human magnet. Apparently he lacked charisma and polite common sense, and his unfiltered mouth called more trouble than friends.

 

The journey from Frankfurt am Main to Regensburg lasted more than just four days due to Eren's insistence on sleeping in each time they spent the night at an inn. It was his way of prolonging the trip. Though they eventually crossed the border and entered the Kingdom of Bavaria. Königreich Bayern. He knew Bavaria had acted a big part in the Franco-Prussian war that would eventually establish the German Empire under the rule of the Prussian king Wilhelm I. And everyone knew that the King of Bavaria was in fact suffering under said victory. He might have won the war under the alliance, but it was a loss of his sovereignty. Eren wondered how such a beautiful and proud king dealt with the fact of being subject to the emperor. He'd heard many stories about the king's handsome features that would capture a nation.

The teen sighed during his daydream. The charm of Ludwig II von Bayern truly filled the air of his whole kingdom, and before long, even Eren was reduced to being a lovestruck youngster. He even bought a postcard with the portrait of the young king. What was wrong with him, he wondered. But daydreaming provided a great escape from his fears towards entering Regensburg. Later, he decided to hide the postcard. The family didn't have to know that he was interested in men; his situation was bad enough.

Crossing the bridge to Regensburg definitely destroyed his temporary elation and seeing Thurn and Taxis castle in front of him made him want to vomit. He definitely wasn't ready. Soon he was going to meet his older brother about twice his age. In his fifteen years of life he'd only met his brother once. Well, they hadn't actually met, Eren had only seen him from afar. When he was granted a visit to see his father, little Eren caught a glimpse of young Levi. He had looked stoic and dignified like the prince he was.

And now Eren was entering the family's castle, it felt like he was cattle lead to the slaughter. The heavy portal closed behind him and thus also his only escape. Eren fidgeted, played with the buttons of his waistcoat nervously, green eyes wide and full of terror. Because nobody had given him any instructions, he simply remained in place and didn't even dare to leave his spot. His usual courage had somehow left him. Even though he kept telling himself that he was not bound by the princely house, he knew it wasn't the case. He was bound to the name Thurn und Taxis by blood and the reality of being in their possession. An unwanted possession, but still without reign over his own life.

The sound of footsteps descending the grand staircase caught his attention, it sounded resolute like a soldier and at the same time graceful, very befitting of a Fürst. The boy didn't even dare to raise his head. Something about the man's presence squelched his confidence.

"You are late."

Surprisingly, the man didn't possess a booming voice - in fact, it was almost soothing. Nevertheless, it was filled to the brim with authority.

Eren finally mustered all his courage, and for the first time in ten years he was met with the sight of his half brother, the current head of the house Thurn and Taxis. And it felt like seeing the same young man from a decade ago.

Levi was standing in the middle of the staircase, one hand buried in the pocket of his tight-fitting frock coat, the other one grasping a cane with a silver scrimshaw handle. Even from a distance he knew the Fürst was shorter than him, though definitely more imposing. The nonchalant, almost arrogant posture was complemented by the icy grey eyes staring down on him with a frown. Black hair fell onto his face like a curtain and framed his otherwise pale complexion. Levi looked younger than his age but was as impressive as a long reigning king.

"F-forgive me..." Eren was frantically looking for an appropriate way to address the man before him. Did he say brother? Definitely not. "...Your Serene Highness."

Levi descended the stairs and approached him in a leisurely pace. Eren fought the urge to step back once the man was getting dangerously close to him. And now it was obvious that Levi was quite a bit shorter than him. The icy glare's intensity however did not wane. Those somehow unchanging eyes seemed to observe every little detail of Eren's expression, as if trying to pierce right into his soul.

"You seem frightened." Was there an undertone of amusement?

"I...I still have no idea why I was summoned here." Eren wanted to look at the portraits on the wall, at the furniture, at the ceiling, at anything else that wasn't those unnerving eyes. But he couldn't. It was so distressing that he felt his lips form a childish pout, about to tremble and eventually let out a mewl.

"Really no idea at all?"

"I hurt a Prussian officer," he answered meekly.

"Why did you do such a foolish thing, I wonder? What made the shitty brat in front of me who is about to shit his pants go so far as to punch an officer?" Levi's expression hadn't changed at all, but his voice indicated curiosity.

And Eren was sick of this power play. He was sick of being mentally oppressed just because he was standing in front of someone who had the power to crush his life in consequence of something he himself had had absolutely no control over. "Because that bastard deserved it! The world does not need worthless scum like him! He's lucky I even let him live! He claims to be a defender of law but in the end he's just an animal abusing his power to screw a woman. If that is justice, then I have no need of such a thing and-"

He was interrupted by a sudden jolt to his chin. Before he knew what was happening, he was already on the floor gasping. Eren groaned, tried to heave himself back up but the sole of Levi's polished shoe was pushing him down. This was it, he was going to receive his punishment. He cursed his father for being unfaithful to his lawful spouse, he cursed him for letting a child he never wanted be born in this world where he would simply end up as someone whose own flesh didn't belong to him. Eren was about to submit to his fate when he felt cold metal pushing against his chin. His face was tilted upward by the silver handle of Levi's cane and he stared at the lord of the house with his hazy vision.

The words that left his half brother's mouth was not what he had expected.

"I like your attitude. I shall train you like a dog. A dog that is going to become a worthy prince under my supervision. Because Eren, if you want to change anything, you will need power.

“Do you want power?"

 

 


	2. Zeitalter

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for the positive response, I love you all! Hope you guys like the second chapter.

Thurn and Taxis castle or Emmeram Castle in Regensburg had five hundred rooms, among them a ball room in the splendid manner of baroque design, in the same style a library with green pillars, ceiling frescoes, and a collection of twenty thousand books. The southern wing had a staircase of marble, the eastern turret accommodated a chapel made of golden embellishments. The extensive castle grounds was big enough for a park complete with fountains and a free standing garden pavilion.

Eren was still flabbergasted by the new reality that he, an illegitimate child, was from now on going to live in such a castle. He followed Levi with precarious steps, at any time ready to find out that this was all just a cruel joke to mess with his head. The sound of Levi's cane tapping on the ground reverberated within the hallways which reminded Eren of a smaller version of Versailles’s hall of mirrors. He figured that the Fürst was using it for the sole purpose of being fashionable, since he didn't seem to have any problems walking on his own.

Caught in his own confused thoughts, he almost bumped against the smaller male's back. Levi had stopped walking and was now standing in front of a white double door, he turned his head to look at his brother with the same apathetic eyes from moments ago, and opened the door to reveal a bedchamber in classical Roman style. The walls were olive green and a pair of coral marble pillars stood on the left side of the room like guardians for the pale golden swan bed with a canopy at its head. A golden chandelier provided a warm dancing light.

Levi looked at Eren with expectant eyes, Eren stared back, puzzled. The older man sighed. “Well?”

Eren wasn't sure what was asked of him and once again felt anxiety rise in him. “Well what?”

“How do you like your room?” Said the other as if stating the obvious. “It used to be Fürstin Therese's chamber, but I think it suits you. It has swans carved onto the bed, kids like animals, don't they?”

The boy's jaw dropped and didn't close again, which elicited a mildly disgusted grunt from Levi. “This is my room? Don't you want me to...like...live in the basement or something?”

Levi furrowed his brows in confusion. “Do you prefer the basement? That's rather odd, but I don't want you to catch any diseases and come in contact with more germs than necessary, so I will have to ask you to stay in the upper chambers.”

Eren shook his head energetically and jumped into his new personal chamber ere Levi could change his mind. “No, thank you very much! I like it here...especially the swans.”

Levi nodded, apparently satisfied about Eren liking the swans? The teen wasn't too sure, since the aristocrat's expression was so hard to read. He was then told to change out of his filthy clothes and take a bath; after that he was to join his brother for dinner.

Once Levi had left Eren finally deemed it alright to breathe. He let his gaze wander around the luxurious chamber, finding it hard to digest everything. Eren collapsed into bed face first and was amazed by the soft feeling – it was as if he was lying on a cloud. Life for him had never been one in poverty, after all Palais Thurn and Taxis was no shack but a true palace; however, due to the nature of the Palais being the headquarters for the family's post company, there weren't many actual living quarters. And Eren's was nice, but this one was on an entirely different level.

Sleep was a tempting idea, his eyes agreed as they drooped closed and exhaustion spread all over his body now that he was allowed to relax. He thought about Levi and the things he had said and done. A part of him deduced said man's actions as acts of kindness, but the terrified and realistic part of him thought that all this was too good to be true. Levi had no reasons to take him in, not the bastard child, the living proof of his father's unfaithfulness, not the boy who had caused public trouble. No matter how he turned and twisted the story, the only sentiment Levi could feel towards Eren was hatred. And yet he was given such a luxurious room.

The boy forced himself up to follow Levi's orders. A bath wasn't a bad idea at all and he was feeling hungry. His suitcase was already in his room, probably brought up in advance. Eren gathered clean clothes he deemed acceptable for dinner and asked a maid to lead him to the bathroom.

 

As expected, they dined in a smaller room as opposed to the grand dining hall, but what he didn't expect was that they were going to dine alone. He wasn't sure whether it was better that way or not. Awkwardly, he nodded and walked clumsily as if he'd just learnt how to do so. Safely taking his seat was an act of miracle – his previous hunger dissipated and only left a sick feeling in his stomach. Levi rested his gaze on the awkward boy in front of him, noticed the obvious discomfort.

“That ribbon you're wearing around your collar is cute,” he said monotonously.

Eren stared at him with unbelieving eyes. What the fuck was this man even saying? Was he by a chance trying to relieve Eren of his fears? The boy looked down in shame and took hold of the cutlery. “I'm sorry...and thank you. For the compliment, and for everything.”

Levi didn't answer and began to eat.

Dinner was silence except for the occasional clinking of cutlery and the sound of wine poured to refill the glass. Technically, Eren was happy that he wasn't subject to some unpleasant talk or even questioning, but then again, silence was just as unnerving. One day, if not his physical aggression, then his loose mouth would be the cause of his end. No matter how much he knew he was better off acting docile for his own sake, he just couldn't help the urge to probe.

“Why are you keeping me here? And what do you mean you will train me like a dog?” Right after the words were said he gasped and covered his mouth. Instantly, his eyes darted to the ground.

Levi stopped eating, neatly put the spoon back, dabbed his mouth with a napkin. At first it didn't seem like he was about to respond, yet he turned his body to face Eren full on, propped his elbow on the table and rested his hand against his temple. “Say Eren, when Otto von Bismarck announced that he was going to unify the German nations with iron and blood, do you think his motives were of patriotic nature or was it perhaps political pragmatism?”

Eren was dumbstruck by the seemingly unrelated question. He himself was fifteen years old and with a clear vision of what he conceived as just, he could react to a certain thing depending on whether he thought it right or wrong. Just like the time he punched that Prussian officer. But by all means, he wasn't a politician. And the Fürst surely hadn't answered any of his questions.

Levi clearly understood that the other was at a loss and huffed. “That is exactly what I'm trying to do with the both of us. Unification.”

“Pardon me?”

The older man sighed. “I want to integrate you into the Thurn und Taxis house.”

Eren stared at Levi, the words just now sounded so outlandish and downright incomprehensible. One hand blindly searched for the glass of wine, he downed the red liquid in one go and savoured the warmth spreading in his body until it was replaced by numbness. Levi grimaced at him for wasting a good vintage.

“Slow down, brat.”

“What do you mean integrate?”

“Do you even speak German? I was saying that I'm going to make you an official member of the family.”

Eren's brows furrowed in confusion. “But why would you do that? The other branches of the family won't even allow such unthinkable thing!”

“I'm the family head, I can do as I please,” said Levi and leant back against the chair, finality evident in his voice. “I want a safeguard in these times of turning tides.”

The until just moments ago orphaned child felt a spark of hope rise in his chest. The truth was, he'd never felt hatred towards the Thurn and Taxis family, and perhaps there had been times when he'd secretly wished to belong. That was the child in him that longed for a place to call family, no matter how often his maturing reason told him that he had no need for a place that had abandoned him so readily.

His fingers were slightly trembling when he placed the wine glass back. “And is this decision of patriotic nature or is it political pragmatism?”

_Is this decision based on love towards a brother or are you using me?_

Levi's eyes widened in surprise. And for the first time he was silent, not because he chose to be, for he was genuinely at a loss for words. “Cheeky brat,” he mumbled.

Standing up, he threw the napkin onto the dining table, then stalked over towards Eren. He grabbed the head of Eren's chair's backrest, settled his other arm on the opposite armrest, and bent down, successfully trapping the boy. There was no time to be amused by his brother's startled expression.

Meanwhile, Eren was still fighting to figure out what was going on, and Levi caging him and being so damn close was not helping. Flustered, he stammered: “Y-your Highness?”

Levi narrowed his eyes. Always his eyes. “It's not like there's nothing for you in this arrangement. You seem to be someone who has a drive to bring forth change, concrete change made possible by concrete actions. Even though action comes first, and thinking is secondary or even optional. And here I am, offering you the opportunity to make significant change. But the play of power needs to be trained.

Bismarck did not unify Germany with raw power, but with a delicate play using _people with power_. I want you to become capable, Eren. This Zeitgeist calls for people who endure and enforce change. Become a politician, a military officer or a cleric, this family can make it happen. As long as you don't go by the old aristocratic thinking that contentment is hereditary.”

Eren gulped. “What makes you think I want all of this? All I did was punch an officer because he lacked common sense.”

“Because common sense is a gift. Your actions speak, and they say that you care. You cared for a single woman you didn't know, and you probably care for others in general, too. Maybe you're too young to dream of overthrowing the flow of time, but you have the potential. And as long as there's potential, I am content to take you in. After all, I don't want a useless spoiled brat. That's just a waste of time and space.”

“What do you want me to do?”

“Follow my every word as though it is the holy bible. And you shall become a true prince of Thurn und Taxis.” By now Levi's face had inched closer, their foreheads were almost touching.

“You aren't trying to overthrow the empire or anything?” Eren had his doubts.

“Are you stupid? I told you, I want to secure our line. Fighting alone in a time where international relations could topple over each time the Balance of Power is disturbed is not what I deem smart. I need a capable person next to me in order to endure this German empire balancing between parliament and monarchy.”

“In other words, you need me?” The Fürst witnessed how a stupidly broad smile took over the stupid boy's face. Suddenly, he felt so tired. He couldn't remember the last time he'd talked this much.

“Another thing. Drop the highness crap. Call me Levi.”

“Yes Levi!” The smile was now a face-splitting grin.

 

Eren wanted to return to Frankfurt.

Of course he was aware that integration into the Thurn and Taxis house meant lots of studies with different tutors, and good thing Eren was already a student in the first place, so it wasn't like he was facing completely foreign subjects. But he swore to God, the tutors Levi hired were all downright manic.

There was this Hermann von Helmholtz rambling about the velocity of the propagation of electromagnetic induction being about 314,000 meters per second, and that Eren really should read the book he wrote about that. And then there was his tutor on literature, who'd successfully lulled him to sleep with his constant chanting of _exposition, rising action, climax, falling action, dénouement..._

The worst of all was probably Zoe Hanji, his tutor in etiquette. Eren was convinced that woman had misplaced herself in her subject of choice, because each time it was her turn to teach him, she rather chose to flirt with Helmholtz. And with flirting Eren meant to say euphoric discussions about thermodynamics. What did she see in that old geezer anyway?

“So, Eren – how about you tell me about the time you spent in Frankfurt? Did you meet Goethe?” Asked the Englishwoman as she was stapling books on Eren's head to work on his posture.

Eren groaned. “Miss Hanji, Goethe has been dead for almost 40 years now...”

“Call me Zoe.” There was now a small tower on the teenager's head. “Now, how about we try to dance. Try to balance the books while we move.”

Eren nodded. His sense of balance was pretty good, so it shouldn't be too much of a problem. The challenge would heighten his concentration and his posture would be more precise. However, dancing was not something he was familiar with. As someone who was never invited to any parties and balls, he'd never acquired the skills to dance. However, he somehow didn't want to disappoint Levi. Which was why he was intently listening to Hanji's instructions.

She clapped her hands, Eren took her hand and placed his on her waist. They nodded at each other.

“Listen to me giving you the rhythm, Eren.” The student took the first step and tried to keep a straight posture.

“One, two, three, Jäger, one, two, three, Jäger...”

Eren spluttered and burst out laughing, his shoulders shook, arms were now clutched around his stomach. The books tumbled off of his head, he gasped and tried to catch them mid air by frantically flailing his arms – Hanji tried to do the same, but they ended up bumping against each other, lost balance and toppled over. The books landed on the floor rather pitifully and Eren was now on top of his tutor.

They stared at each other a moment before bursting out in a series of giggles. It was not after moments later when they realised the other person standing in the room in front of them. Eren looked up only to see Levi staring down on them with his usual deadpan expression.

“I can explain?” was Eren's attempt to clear up the obvious misunderstanding.

“...disgusting.” Levi turned on his heels and left the room with brisk steps.

The boy hit Hanji with one of the books halfheartedly. “Congratulations, you're now officially the woman who tried to get in a 15-year-old boy's pants.”

“Or you're the spark who tried to seduce a woman double his age with his underdeveloped penis.” That statement made Eren scramble away from her with a scandalised expression, obviously not at all used to seeing women use such wordings.

 

Eren's favourite time was the shared time spent after dinner. It usually was just Levi and him sitting in front of the fireplace while he reported the things he'd learnt during the lessons. Luckily, the elder brother agreed that Freytag's dramatic structure analysis could be skipped to prevent them both from falling asleep.

Admittedly, Eren liked to observe his brother whenever he wasn't looking, for he was curious to know what kind of person he was. Initially, he thought Levi was someone who liked to intimidate everyone around him, someone who didn't bother about their feelings, someone who hated people. But Eren couldn't have been more wrong. Each time he observed Levi from afar whenever he was engaged in a conversation with others, he was as expected an intimidating figure, but the people seemed to be drawn to him. That was when Eren realised, Levi didn't hate people.

He valued them.

The only difference was, he didn't show his kindness with softened expressions and kind smiles. Eren knew that he should have seen the signs beforehand. The time when Levi gave him Fürstin Therese's room because he thought children liked animals, when he complimented his ribbon to soothe his distressed mind, those were all signs of his kindness. He'd heard it before that there are people who appear vile and incapable of smiling but possess a kind heart, not because they chose to be distant, but simply because that's how they are.

Eren chuckled at the thought. Still, he couldn't claim that he understood Levi completely. There were still aspects of his personality and motives that were still a riddle to him. However, until then he was just going to enjoy their time together, because Levi somehow had a calming effect on his otherwise angry soul.

Goodness, he really was being tamed like a dog.

“You are a gentle person, aren't you, Levi?”

Levi looked up from the letters he had been reading, a mild shock evident in his pale face. “Brat, did the wine go to your head?”

Was there a waver in his voice and a flush on his cheeks or was it only the warm light of the fire?

Eren realised just how embarrassing his words were and buried his face behind the soft pillow he had been hugging. “'M sorry,” he mumbled. “It's just...at first I was so afraid of you. I still am, but on the first day your eyes turned me to stone just like Medusa. But now I feel bad about it.”

Levi sighed and lowered the letters onto his lap, he appeared to be contemplating something. “You think too highly of me, Eren.”

“What have you been reading anyway?” Eren asked as he decided to change the topic, he pointed at the letters.

“Nothing much, these are invitations to several parties and dinners. I'm just trying to find out which one's the best for your debut as a Thurn und Taxis son.”

“ _What_?” Eren wasn't prepared for this. Levi wanted an illegitimate son to tag along with him to some high class party. “Not a good idea.”

The Fürst glared at him. “We have an agreement, Eren. And it is a crucial step to make yourself be known. I know there will be negative feedback, but not everyone is a purist. I will choose a gathering with political figures for that reason. And you've been studying with Zoe, haven't you? Etiquette shouldn't be a problem, provided you did learn something in between your...intimate activities.”

Eren groaned and wanted to disappear.

He didn't feel like he was ready to meet people of Levi's social circle, there were too many ways this plan could fail. But Levi seemed to trust him, and he knew he had no choice but to comply.

“Alright, but choose one with the nicest people.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Time for footnotes :3
> 
>  
> 
> [Thurn and Taxis Castle](http://www.regensburger-touristen-guide.de/images/locations/schloss_st_emmeram/530/1.jpg)  
> [Iron and Blood](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Blood_and_Iron_%28speech%29)  
> [Hermann von Helmholtz](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hermann_von_Helmholtz)  
> [Gustav Freytag](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gustav_Freytag)  
> [Johann Wolfgang von Goethe](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Johann_Wolfgang_von_Goethe)  
> [One, two, three, Jäger](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3vwoqRUTz8g)  
> As always, every single Kudo and comment makes me happy <333


	3. Fly, Thought, On Wings of Gold

“You promised me!” 

“I did no such thing.” 

They were both in a carriage in front of the First Mayor's country house. Levi sat cross-legged, hands resting on his cane, half of his face was shrouded in darkness. Eren occupied the seat on the opposite side, though his posture wasn't as relaxed. In fact, he was pale and his nape felt damp with cold sweat. 

“You said, you would give me a low profile start.”

“No, you said you wanted a low profile start. I never even said that I would consider your whiny pleas.” 

The younger brother rose both hands to grab his hair in frustration, but he remembered just in time that his hair was combed back neatly, so he opted to clench and unclench his fists on the velvet seat instead, because gripping his suit trousers would crease them. 

“But the First Mayor's birthday party? What happened to low-key dinner with a few nobles and politicians?”

“That was my first plan, but then I received this invitation, and I can hardly refuse to attend.” Levi's voice sounded strained, as if he was gradually losing his patience. 

Nodding, Eren rose from his seat and scurried to leave the coach from the side that was not facing the country house's entrance. “Alright, have fun. Tell me how it went, you don't need me for this. I know the way back, don't worry about – oh my God.”

Eren was quick but Levi apparently possessed reflexes that rivalled the speed of lightning, because before the boy could even reach the latch, he was grabbed by the silver handle of the goddamn cane and pulled back onto the cushioned seat. He felt like he was about to cry at the sight of Levi's threatening glare. He'd made him angry. 

“Do not test my patience, Eren.” Once again the younger male tasted fear, one that he hadn't felt in a while since the beginning of his stay in Regensburg. 

Levi sighed heavily, and even that managed to make the boy flinch. That wasn't what the Fürst had intended, and it seemed like their relationship had reverted back to their first encounter. Now he wasn't quite sure what to do. Hesitantly, he stretched one arm to pat on Eren's shoulder, which only resulted in a frightened jolt. He drew his hand back.

“Eren...”

There it was again, the panicked eyes. “I'm sorry, I'll go...so please, don't be angry at me.” 

No, I'm sorry for making you feel afraid...again.” It wasn't like he was proud of his violent act during their first meeting. And he was well aware that binding Eren with fear was one of the worst options. However, his person wasn't capable of anything else. It was a life-long curse. 

The apology finally made the other look up. Fascinating how a boy with a violent record could be so vulnerable. Maybe he was, after all, just a boy. 

“I'll be there too, you know. You won't be alone, promise.” Grey eyes locked onto blue-greens that ever appeared to be universes of their own, housing galaxies and exploding stars. 

Eren, eased by Levi's reassurance, smiled faintly. He felt better, but not at peace. However, he knew he had no choice, since it was his own decision to become an official son of the main house of Thurn and Taxis. Worriedly, he turned his head and squinted at the vague reflection of his own face in the coach window. He tutted and faced Levi once again, cleared his throat. 

“How do I look?” Eren bit his lower lip. 

Levi tilted his head critically, eyeing his brother up and down scanning for any wrinkle and flaws. It was still a mystery to him how people automatically assumed that he was obsessed about others' prim appearance, while in truth he couldn't care less. As long as they weren't dirty, but that too couldn't be helped at times. He knew however that it was indeed of importance for Eren to appear impeccable to leave a positive impression. 

He took in the sight of his half brother. A tailor had come to the castle for a measuring, the suit had to hug Eren's form perfectly. And Levi had to admit, the tailor had done an excellent job. The colour of choice was black. Black was a modern colour; black was the colour worn by poets and statesmen, so it would always carry a connotation of intelligence and sophistication. The double-breasted frock coat with golden buttons and peaked lapels fit snugly against Eren's waist, underneath a waistcoat in a subtly lighter shade made of cashmere stripes patterned silk. And even Levi couldn't find a single fault in the immaculately white shirt with winged collars adorned with a black bow tie. Both of them sported a combed back hair style, it made Eren look mature. 

Their outfits were similar, except for little details such as Levi's choice in wearing a cravat as per usual and the more traditional high collar, as well a plain black waistcoat decorated with a silver watch chain. For the first time they did look like brothers .

Eren had grown nervous whilst Levi was putting his getup under the microscope, he half expected a scolding for sloppiness. But the other only nodded in approval, no words of praise but it was enough to make Eren breathe out in relief.

Levi cocked his head towards the country house's entrance and stepped out of the coach. Eren followed suit with a sick feeling. 

At the door leading to the foyer they were greeted by a footman offering to relieve Levi of his cane, yet Levi declined. So they were led further to the salon of neoclassical interior, spacious and bright. A man in ceremonial clothing greeted them, Levi flashed his invitation and murmured something Eren couldn't hear. The man nodded in understanding and pounded the floor with a staff he had been holding to gain the other guests' attention. 

Eren stood next to Levi in perfect posture and stoic expression, not willing to show just how nervous he actually was.

All eyes were on them. And it got worse. 

“The Fürst von Thurn und Taxis and the Prince von Thurn und Taxis,” The announcement rang clear and unmistakably. 

Eren wanted to disappear. 

Levi had gone all out and told the guest announcer an audacious lie. Because Eren was definitely not yet a bearer of said title. And shock began to settle all over the salon, first ruled by silence, then the occasional whisper. Levi remained undeterred and stepped inside, head held high. The exasperated brother followed him after a brief hesitation. He felt scrutinising eyes following him as he passed more and more people. 

A middle-aged man with a bald forehead approached them with arms wide open. Ah, it was probably the mayor himself, Eren thought. The mayor greeted the Fürst von Thurn und Taxis with a bow which was returned with a curt nod. 

“I am delighted to see you've taken your precious time to attend this gathering, your highess.” 

“A pleasure.” Levi didn't even look like he meant it, but the mayor seemed unfazed, obviously used to the other's personality. “May I introduce to you my younger brother, Eren Maximilian Lamoral.”

Eren groaned inwardly. He hadn't heard his full set of names in ages, they oddly made the situation even more unreal. 

The mayor's reaction wasn't what Eren had expected, the awaited sneer or contempt never came. “This is the famous Prince of Thurn and Taxis! I am honoured to have you here, your highness.” 

The 'Prince' watched his brother, and found him wearing the usual apathetic look, but with a hint of satisfaction made clear by the way his brows were less furrowed. Mayor Oskar von Stobäus was a liberal, Eren remembered Levi saying. So maybe he wasn't too opposed by the idea of someone with Eren's background joining a family of high nobility. Even if he was, he surely didn't openly show it. The open greeting didn't change the fact that many were staring at him with blatant interest as if he was a zoo attraction. 

It felt like he was on trial.

Shortly afterwards the chamber music began to play again, the festive tune of a pianoforte accompanied by a string quartet filled the hall, and people resumed their conversations with one another. Though Eren was sure some were now about him. To occupy his attention, he decided to take everything in. After all, he'd never been to such an upper-class gathering. Gentlemen were smartly dressed, though they weren't as interesting as the ladies present. The ladies, especially the younger ones, wore colourful bustled dresses with elaborate pleats, flounces and frills. A fashion trend from Britain. 

Eren was so engrossed in his observation that he didn't notice the tall man approach him and his brother. The voice greeting them made him jump. 

“Hello there, old friend. I see you have a new addition to your family, though not the way I expected.” 

The stranger was tall, towered above Levi, and had a huge presence that overshadowed everything. His hair was blond and parted to the side without any flyaways, strong jaws and thick eyebrows above clear blue eyes accentuated the powerful impression. 

“Erwin.” Levi's voice retained its usual calm quality. “I heard you're now the British foreign minister... and you call yourself Smith now.” 

“Yeah well, Schmidt was too German. But I do regret leaving Germany, you people have a fascinating chancellor.” The man, Erwin Smith, let his gaze rest on Eren. “When are you going to introduce your baby brother to me?”

Eren decided to take initiative. “It is an honour to meet you, your excellency.” He offered the other his hand for a shake. Erwin Smith took it and smiled faintly. 

“Your name?”

“Eren.” 

“Eren is an exotic name. You two brothers carry unusual names for aristocrats. Very nationally untypical and...sacral.”

Eren didn't know what to think of Erwin Smith, but him pointing out a similarity between Levi and him, though they were akin to the sky and earth, made him happy. As if he was given a proof that they were indeed family. He couldn't help the shy smile even if it meant dropping his stoic façade. 

“Thank you, your excellency.” His voice was but above a whisper. 

Levi looked at Eren, then back up at Erwin Smith granting him a scowl. It was returned with a knowing smirk that said _you're angry I was able to make him feel at ease so easily._ Fürst Thurn und Taxis huffed, averting his eyes. 

The whole evening Levi didn't leave Eren's side just as he had promised, and Eren was thankful for that. Nobody dared to drop any snide remarks in his presence, so the younger brother felt safe. Though Eren made sure not to appear too clingy and childish. Being taller than Levi helped. 

Even though neither of them seemed to particularly enjoy the party, Eren was the first to forfeit. He excused himself from the circle of poets that had surrounded them. It appeared like Levi was about to object, then decided to remain silent. 

Walking straight through the sea of people without Levi felt like hell. Nobody bothered to conceal their blatant stares and curious ogling. The room seemed to expand, the people grew in size like titans, and he found himself shrinking, losing any sense of significance within him. Just a moment. He was almost there. He could already see the double door leading to the terrace. Only a few more steps until he could finally escape the judging eyes. 

* * *

 

Fresh air wafted against his face like salvation. Eren closed the doors behind him and inhaled the chill evening air. He sighed heavily. To think that this was only the beginning of a long journey. Eren felt like quitting already. At the same time he felt anger rise in his chest, one that was throbbing against his ribcage and threatening to burst out. Always, there were always people who had to be so goddamn exclusive in their tiny little bubbles. He wanted to lash out, but simultaneously he was afraid, and didn't want to ruin the deal with Levi. In the face of great injustice he felt powerless. 

Eren looked up to take in his surrounding. It was a spacious terrace with a white balustrade trailing across the edge, it was covered in twining ivies. From there on one was able to overlook the garden which was eventually taken over by the forest. Only then did he notice the other person occupying the space. A boy who looked his age was sitting on a white wooden bench with a book in his lap. His chin length blond hair framed his face, the rest was tied back in a pony tail. He was smiling at Eren. 

The young prince felt awkward but realised it would be rude to just walk off without even acknowledging the other. So he nodded and approached the other teen, asked if it was all right to sit next to him. A nod of approval made him sit down and smile nervously. 

“Also having a break from the party?” Eren attempted to start a conversation. 

The other boy nodded, no less awkwardly than Eren. “Yeah, it was getting pretty boring inside.” 

Eren chuckled. Somehow, it felt good to meet someone of his age for a chance. During his stay in Regensburg he was constantly surrounded by adults, making him unable to drop his guard. While he was never a very social person, he did miss the company of other same-aged people. 

“My name's Eren by the way.” 

“Mine's Armin. Nice to meet you Eren.”

“What are you reading?” Eren peered at the book in Armin's lap, it looked well-read judging by the worn out leather around the edges. 

Armin's large blue eyes glinted in the moonlight, and a tang of a smile tugged at the corners of his lips. He lifted the book, and held it up, hiding half of his face behind it. “ _This_...is a book about Alexander von Humboldt's expedition in South America.” 

The boy flipped the pages and pointed at dozens of illustrations of curious plants and strange fossils. Eren scooted closer to get a better look at the pictures. It was like peeking through a window to a different world, one that was so vast and unexplored, one couldn't help but feel humbled. He was never one desperately interested in natural science, always thought that explorers were sort of nutters detached from the actual world, but Armin spoke with so much passion and on top of that also had a knack for constructing words into fascinating explanations. So Eren too found himself immersed in the content of the book. 

“Can you imagine crossing the Atlantic Ocean, carried by a large ship under the command of a capable captain, but always at the mercy of nature's whim? Humboldt witnessed a meteor shower in Cumaná, and did you know that those are probably periodical events? 

“Also, the United States looks like an exciting place to visit too. Goodness, Eren, you have no idea how I'm dying to leave this place where I was born. I surely don't wanna die here.”

And soon they were both hunched over the book, pointing at ridiculous looking animals, fantasising about the ocean, the chains of mountains, and several other landscapes that exceeded their imagination. Many of those went overboard, but the boys didn't seem to care. 

“Hey, Armin...why don't you just hop on a ship and go there?” Eren was still reading a detailed report about volcanoes. Of course it wasn't that easy, but surely Armin must have considered that option. 

Armin turned silent all of the sudden, and Eren feared he'd said something insensitive. But looking up he found the other smiling not in sadness but determination. Strangely, not the kind of determination that was ready to jump on a ship right then and there. 

“I hope that someday I will do just that. It's a dream. But until then there are still things I need to do.” 

“Things like what?” 

“Things like fighting for the people here.” 

“You mean in the military?” 

Armin chuckled and shook his head. “No. You know, sometimes I think about myself, and how insignificant I am. After all, I'm just a meek boy, I can't boast about physical strength, I sometimes think I'm just a burden to others. But then I look up.” 

Both of them looked up at the cloudless night sky where they were faced with a space so unimaginably wide, filled with an unthinkable number of softly glistening stars. And Eren understood. 

“I look up and see a sea of stars. They appear so small, but we know they're even bigger than the earth or even our sun. But no matter how big they are, they are still so insignificant in relation to the universe. 

“Do you know what I'm trying to say, Eren? I'm trying to say that while I am but a speck of dust in this universe, everybody else is too. You and me, the mayor, the king of Bavaria, the German emperor, without exception. So why do we pretend that one entity is bigger than the other? Why are there people entitled to stand above others and stomp over their dignity and existence?” 

Eren hung on his new friend's every word with wide eyes. Armin paused and glanced at Eren, maybe expecting the other to say something in return. However, not a single word left Eren's lips, instead he looked like he wanted him to continue. 

“This is a _question sociale_ , Eren. We live in a time of progress, and never before was bourgeoisie as wealthy as today – look at my family for example. But a majority is struggling with life. They work in factories for endless hours, children too! They don't work to improve their lives, no they do it just to survive the day. Work, work, work, a loaf of bread, and repeat. They live in cramped places you couldn't even call home. That's not equality.” 

Armin then told Eren that he was probably going to join a party to make a difference, maybe the Social Democratic Workers' Party. Eren was inspired by the person next to him. To think that such a shy person was so driven even though he himself wasn't afflicted, maybe even sheltered by his parents. 

Levi had initiated him to achieve greatness in his new-found position, but the one to actually inspire him was Armin. Armin who wanted nothing but an adventure across the sea, yet bound by a sense of responsibility over others, and driven to action by nothing but compassion. 

Their life changing little chat was interrupted by Levi showing up on the terrace. Armin gasped and stood up in order to leave. He turned around to face Eren for the last time, hesitated with a blush, but then extended his arms to offer him the book. Eren had to do a double take. “Are you giving it to me?”

The blond nodded. 

“But isn't it very precious to you?” 

“That's why I'm giving it to you. As a token of our friendship.” 

When was the last time he had someone he could call a friend? Eren did not remember. Happiness flooded his very being, a soothing force stronger than his previous distress at the party. He took the book with a grateful smile. 

“Thank you Armin. I will treasure it as my most valuable possession. And remember, I might be nothing but dust, and you just another dust grain. But you've given this speck of dust inspiration in its life. I hope we'll meet again.” 

Armin grinned and squeezed Eren's hands before he turned to hurry back into the building, stopped for a second to slightly bow before Levi. 

Levi's gaze followed the blond with mild interest. “Who's that?” He sauntered over to the bench and sat down to occupy the space previously taken by Armin. 

“A new friend,” replied Eren. He was smiling to himself. 

Levi watched him smile. It was the second time he saw Eren smile that night.

“Is it that uncomfortable to be with me?” 

The younger brother turned his head in shock. “What?” 

“You smile at Erwin, at the stranger kid. But not at me.” 

“I've been smiling at you these past weeks, you know that.” 

“But not today. Is it because you're reminded of the obligation you are under?” Levi was looking at the ivy plant to his side, not at his brother. “Do you hate me?”

Eren wanted to have a glimpse at his brother's current expression. He wanted to see the look on his face. His heart pounded at the implication of Levi's words. 

“How can I hate my brother?”

Levi's long fingers twitched. And finally, he moved his head just slightly. 

All along Eren was insecure about his actual role as a brother. By and by he was beginning to accept the notion that Levi was just using him for his own purpose, never did he dare to even indulge in the thought of being seen as a family member. 

“I know I'm shitty at doing this big brother job, but...” Levi's sentence was cut off by the sound of Eren's airy laughter. The elder brother looked up and was rewarded with the sight of Eren's laughing face, free and without any restraint. 

He was about to throw in an insult as was his usual reaction, but he couldn't will himself to do it. Not when his face was so relaxed and his voice so melodious in his state of laughter. 

Levi scolded himself for having crappy and idiotic thoughts about wanting to protect that smile, as if a late bloomer romantic poet was infesting his brain. 

“Levi, I'll make sure to smile at you at least once a day, okay?” Eren was still giggling. 

“Brat, don't overdo it.” But the promise made him happy nonetheless. 

They sat there in silence taking in the air and the relative silence, the chattering of the party was muffled behind the doors. Eren was actually starting to feel cold having been outside for much longer than Levi but he still enjoyed the peaceful moment. 

“His name is Armin. The lad just now. And he said he wanted to cross the ocean one day, but not until he'd made this nation a better place,” said Eren. 

Levi hummed, admittedly a little bit impressed. The blond boy didn't look like someone that ambitious. “Not bad.” 

“I would like to cross the ocean, too. But maybe not until I've secured my name in human history – don't want you to disown me after all.” 

“No, I won't do such a thing even if you haven't.” 

Eren stared, astonished. Then with a sheepish smile he said: “You wouldn't have said that a few weeks ago. Have I garnered your affection?” 

“Shut up.” 

The horrible night was starting to become the best one he had in years. And now he just couldn't conceal his smile even if he wanted to. Struggling with the hostile upper class environment on his own was agonising, but knowing that he was doing it as Levi's family gave him strength. 

“You did great by the way.”

“At the party?” 

Levi nodded. He hesitated for a moment, then lifted his hand to pet Eren's head, successfully messing up his perfectly done hair. The younger brother made a sound of protest yet both knew he wasn't really complaining. The hand lingered there, and the fingers moved delicately in a stroking motion. A sigh escaped the younger male's lips.

Eventually, the hand was drawn back, albeit regretfully; soft locks grazed Levi's pale skin as the fingers untangled. 

The memory of softness remained. 

Eren was horrified to realise that he had been on the brink of whining for more loving pets. He had wished for the moment to last some more. Was he being selfish now?

“Let's leave, I'm sick of this party,” whispered Levi. 

Eren nodded and followed him out, book tightly pressed against his chest, and eyes transfixed at the back right in front of him. 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Have you ever met someone who inspired you? They talk and everything they say stirrs your soul? That's what happened to Eren. Because I think Armin was the one who planted the seed of Eren's passion and determination towards his goal. Armin is great.  
> Once again, time for footnotes ouo:  
> Oskar von Stobäus - Mayor of Regensburg 1868-1903  
> [Alexander von Humboldt](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alexander_von_Humboldt)  
> [Social Democratic Workers' Party (SDAP)](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Social_Democratic_Workers%27_Party_of_Germany)
> 
> I hope you enjoyed this :U Kudos and comments are appreciated!!!


	4. Eren

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This only took me one month to finish whelp. I'm so sorry guys. But hey, at least the chapters are getting longer - and there's an unhealthy amount of fluff. Fucking finally. 
> 
> Also, I was asked about last chapter's scene where Levi was announced as the Fürst of Thurn and Taxis while Eren was introduced as the Prince of Thurn and Taxis, even though I had explained that they're both the same title just in different languages. Good question. 
> 
> A Fürst is as already stated in the first chapter the head of a principality/princely house, and the English equivalent is the title 'Prince'. Now, the German terminology differentiates between a prince who's the head of a princely house, and the prince who's son of a monarch ('Prinz' in German). The English language however uses the same word ('Prince') for both concepts. Long story short, if Eren is referred to as the prince of Thurn and Taxis, it means that he's the son of said house. Levi, the Fürst, is the head, hence title bearer of the princely house. Maybe I should use the German term Prinz to avoid confusion :). It's kinda complicated if you're not familiar with noble ranks, so feel free to ask if anything's not clear to you.

The air was warmer now. Lilies of the valley dotted the castle's park, and were now slowly replaced by the deep green of grass announcing the arrival of summer. It was also warm enough to keep the windows wide open to invite the sixth month in, accompanied by the sound of birds, the rustling of leaves, and the rippling of water.

Eren lay sprawled on the canapé right next to an open window in the castle's library. Levi, who had been forced to shift to the very edge of the furniture due to his brother taking over all the space, glared at the sleeping face in a displeased manner. Mr Gustav Freytag had fallen ill, therefore he hadn't been able to come tutor Eren as was usual. And since it was Levi's day off, he had decided to take the teaching matter in his own hands. However, his brother had the audacity to fall asleep during the lecture.

Levi contemplated shaking the lazy teen as he deserved nothing less. Such behaviour did not speak in favour of Eren's discipline.

The Fürst was about to shake him awake but his hand froze in the process. Instead he was now studying the sleeping face. Eren's head was slightly tilted to one side leaving his craned neck exposed, the dark fringe fell messily on his forehead unlike the night of his debut. Thick and long eyelashes tickled his own skin, they fluttered along with his steady breathing. And all of a sudden Levi was taking in all the details – the soft rise and fall of Eren's chest, the slender neck, and the slightly parted lips.

The fact that Eren was comfortable enough to fall asleep in Levi's presence showed just how much their relationship had changed. Not too long ago he would have been too tense to even let his attention trail. Levi too, he wouldn't have allowed Eren such gall. And yet he had to admit, not necessarily in defeat, that the boy was starting to become a significant part of his life.

As if on instinct, maybe out of his body's desire to relive the memory of that softness, his fingers moved and curled to brush the dark brown locks. Levi stroked him gently, mindful not to wake him. First his scalp, then trailing down onto Eren's temple, tracing the curve of his jaw, and softly caressing the length of his neck.

Levi at that moment thought that Eren was a beautiful brother.

A creak from across the library forced him to look up.

There on the threshold stood Erwin Smith. His eyebrows raised at the sight of Levi seemingly petting the sleeping boy. Not at all fazed by the unexpected company, the Fürst let go of his brother, and stared at the British foreign minister and old time friend.

Erwin Smith crossed the library, taking in the extensive collection as well the astonishing interior, the room never ceased to impress him. He was careful not to make too much noise for the sake of the resting teenager. Actually, he was intrigued that Levi didn't even bother to wake his brother the moment he stepped into the library, given that it was the usually appropriate course of action. Instead he had opted to let the boy rest.

Very amusing.

“An idyllic family scene at noon, I suppose?” Erwin Smith took the chair opposite the brothers, and sat down with crossed legs, expression teasing.

The master of the house grunted in annoyance. “I don't appreciate unannounced visits, Erwin.”

Ignoring the less than welcoming greeting, the blond moved his attention towards Eren instead. Once again he smiled. “Are you growing soft or are you unwilling to wake him because you got jealous last time I actually managed to get along with Eren?”

“I wasn't jealous. Stop spatting out your Queen's horse shit.”

“Do you kiss Eren with that mouth?”

“Erwin, I swear to God-” Levi's patience was running thin. During the war in 1866 when Erwin Smith was still a German citizen, and a commanding officer leading the military unit in which Levi was appointed to, he seemed to be so much more agreeable. Maybe because they were both reliable partners. And now that they were private acquaintances the elder turned out to be such a pain in the ass. A tolerable one, but still a pain.

“Relax. I'm just glad you're happy again. You deserve to be, Levi.” Erwin Smith uncrossed his legs, and let his arms rest on his thighs, hands clasped together. His teasing smile smoothed out into a genuine one.

Across him Levi was still frowning, both appeased and tormented by the comment. He looked back down at Eren's sleeping form, and hesitantly wondered whether it was all right for him to feel happiness. Or was happiness forgetting? Wasn't Eren's presence supposed to keep him from doing so? And yet here he was – consoled by the younger brother's mere existence around him.

The Fürst's train of thought was horrendously interrupted by a loud bang from whence Erwin Smith had appeared minutes ago – it was loud enough to make both men jump and stare at the source of the ruckus. Levi silently hoped the door had survived the rough handling and hadn't come off of its hinges. The noise was loud enough to startle Eren awake; he sat up straight in no time, head frantically looking for the cause of his disturbance, even ready to deliver a punch if necessary.

Hanji Zoe, the one responsible for the racket, breezed into the library with floating steps which would have been graceful if not for the completely insane expression she wore. The tails of her shadbelly fluttered at her speed of walking, and the heels of her black riding boots made obnoxious clicking noises. Riding crop still in hand, she flailed her arms in excitement.

“A maid told me Erwin is visiting!” The sound of her voice pierced through the idyllic silence, all high pitched and broken like a boy going through puberty.

Eren grimaced in his still sleepy state.

Erwin Smith rose from his seat and smiled at her with the same familiarity of very old friends. He made a move to properly greet her in accord with the etiquette, she however only swatted the gentleman's hand with the riding crop.

“I moved to England in order to meet you, and yet I discovered you reside in Germany now,” lamented Mr Smith.

Hanji rolled her eyes, not falling for any of his attempts. “You would never cross the sea for a woman, Erwin.”

“And you would cross the sea...for whom?” The blond rose his eyebrows in question.

“For science,” she said matter of factly. “As you would for politics or whatever games you play revolving these nations and their predictability in your eyes.”

Which was also the reason why Hanji was mildly curious about Erwin Smith's decision to establish himself and his new name in the world of British politics. Since technically, Germany was bigger and stronger than ever, so it would seem unnecessary, even foolish to switch nationalities. Then again, Erwin Smith had always been a man with eyes always set on the future. On the far future even. Hanji Zoe was the same, but the other judged based on speculations, while she created the future by means of expanding her knowledge of things that were graspable and constant.

That made her a scientist and him a politician. And at times even military commander.

“I was still disappointed at your lack of presence. We are star-crossed, there is no other word.”

Hanji laughed as if she'd just been delivered a marvellous joke. “Your idea of courting is just as bad as mine.”

You two, cut it out. Your mouths are farting out phony shit, and it's disgusting.”

Both turned to stare at Levi, who was still seated next to Eren, looking positively irritated, and less than amused by the two uninvited visitors.

“And here we have our German highness of grumpville, eloquent as ever.” The mad scientist beamed at him.

Meanwhile Eren was fidgeting in his seat. He had presented himself in a most embarrassing state. It had been easy enough to fall asleep during Levi's lecture, for he knew he could get away with it. But he hadn't anticipated any guests, especially not the ex commander. Once again he found himself caught in a circle of adults, feeling out of place and awkward in his own skin.

Despite everything he was still lingering in the remains of a dream he just had. He had dreamt of a hand's gentle touch in his hair, on his skin, wandering sensations so foreign but at the same time familiar.

Eren traced the side of his neck where it was tingling, as if the dream was real. He sighed dreamily.

The action was caught by Levi who had decided to tune out his friends' chattering. He watched the younger run his fingers in the same manner as he'd done just moments ago during the boy's slumber. Levi also noted the licking of lips paired with Eren's bemused eyes, lost in thought. And now Hanji's boasting about her so-called love affair with Eren's science tutor was completely ignored as he had discovered something else even more fascinating.

“Oh!”

Alas, Hanji knew how to ruin a moment. Not that there was a magical moment in the first place, but Levi loathed her interruption anyway. He turned his narrowed gaze at the Englishwoman.

“What is it?” Was his monotonous reply.

“I just remembered, one of your footmen asked me to deliver you this.” Hanji adjusted her glasses, looked down, and patted her breast pocket, then her inside pocket. Her brows were furrowed in brief concentration, next her eyes lit up once she'd found the object. She whipped an envelope from her inside pocket with a triumphant smile. “An urgent letter for you, Highness.”

Levi looked sceptical but took the envelope without question. It bore a red wax seal he recognised.

“What is it?” Finally, Eren had regained his voice. Big eyes were lit up in curiosity, and he craned and stretched his neck to get a better look, but Levi gave him a scolding side glance, clicked his tongue, and walked away to the far off side of the library. Eren deflated visibly, lips pursed in a pout.

Flopping down next to him, Hanji replaced Levi where she proceeded to eye the boy with an odd glint of interest. “Your lessons in etiquette progress terribly, and yet you two seem to hit it off marvellously.”

Eren chuckled.

“Miss Hanji, your definition of hitting it off with somebody is pretty messed up. He's still torturing me with all these lessons without mercy.” Without mercy was a lie, he knew that. “And I thought the absence of Mr Freytag would give me a few days to relax for a bit. But my brother teaching me literature is even worse!”

Eren didn't notice the slip of tongue, but all three adults in the room sure did. It was the first time he had referred to Levi as his brother.

Hanji beamed with glee, back and forth switching to look at Eren and then Levi. Erwin's lips twitched slightly to form the faintest hint of a smile. And Levi, Levi luckily had his back turned to them. He might not have been smiling, but the fact that the elegantly written letters in front of him failed to make any sense in his head was at least an indication that he was not as in control as he would have preferred.

Meanwhile, oblivious about the impact of his own words, Eren ranted away without a care. “And you know,” he gesticulated wildly, “you'd think he likes to analyse dark fellows such as Hoffmann or Goethe or Schiller. But no, he reads Mozart's letters with a passion! For some reason he could get hold of some unpublished letters too crass to be read by the public eye, and they're all about gross things such as excrement and farts. You'd think he's a refined man, but verily, verily, I say to thee, Levi thinks that poop is literature at its finest .”

Eren laughed afterwards, loud and clear, so that Hanji and Erwin had no other choice but to follow suit, especially because they knew about Levi's literary preferences too well. Levi on the other hand only grumbled at their antics, planning to punish the cheeky brat for it later.

His eyes were now back on the letter. The more he read, the more they narrowed. He was gripping onto the sheet of paper tightly that it crumpled and almost tore. What had appeared to be yet another pointless letter full of empty phrases turned out to be an insistence of protest from another branch of the family.

Everybody looked up when Levi decided to tear the letter apart, the sound of it ripping gave him satisfaction. Grey eyes remained icy, devoid of any reaction, as he chucked the ball of paper scraps into a waste bin.

Eren was the first to speak up. “Why did you do that?”

Levi returned, ushered Hanji to scoot away so he could sit next to Eren, and plopped down with an annoyed tut. To those with untrained eyes it would appear as if nothing was any different in the Fürst's expression, however both Hanji and Erwin knew him enough to see the shifting mood. And Eren drew a conclusion when the two guests stopped laughing.

“Dearest cousins and uncles have gotten wind of your presence in this castle, Eren.”

_Oh_.

All colour drained off of his otherwise tan face, mouth agape struggling for words, only to close again, pressed in a thin line. Twitching fingers fiddled with the hem of his sleeve, and his gaze lowered as it lost the ability to look Levi in the eyes. The freshly created confidence in their relationship evaporated in the blink of an eye, and suddenly Eren wasn't so sure any more. Actually, this was something he had anticipated from the very moment he learned about Levi's plan to integrate him into the Thurn and Taxis house, but somewhere during the months of living together he had forgotten. That he was a fake prince without a title, only deserving of a bed by the mercy of one man.

Even though he couldn't deny that their brotherly bonding was genuine, he could never be sure that it was enough to make Levi fight for him. Maybe his brother was going to defend him, but most likely he was going to regret calling Eren to Regensburg in the first place. A slight tremble of dread shook his body.

Levi stood again, this time with a deep sigh. “Eren.”

His name from the other's mouth had gradually become something Eren held dear, but right now it sounded terrifying. “Y-yes?”

Was this his cue to pack his things and leave the castle? If he was going to leave, then he would do it with dignity. Dignity meaning not without yelling at Levi for being an irresponsible twat.

“Go pack your things,” said Levi without missing a beat. Hanji and Erwin stared at the nobleman with shock evident on their features.

That was it. Eren jumped up with clenched fists, throat itching to throw profanities, and face contorted in undisguised fury. He was at a boiling point. But no matter how angry, how betrayed he felt, and how dangerous he looked right now, all he was capable of doing was melting into tears. Large blue green eyes were quickly filled with stinging droplets of tears that he couldn't even see what was in front of him. Everything was just a blurry mess, and it took everything not to break out in pitiful sobs.

“We're going on a tri-” Levi turned around, and was faced with the sight of a tearful Eren who was struggling not to whimper, causing his mouth to be upturned and trembling. “Why the fuck are you crying?”

Levi was on the verge of silently panicking, at the same time the British pair watched everything unfold.

Eren attempted to say something preferably hurtful, but each time all he could do was gasp and choke on his own sobs. “You...pack...me l-leave...”

“I don't understand what you're saying. Speak properly.” His voice came out harsher than intended, but it was because he was too caught off guard. The boy did not come with instructions on how to deal with children crying out of a clear sky. To top everything off, Eren decided to hiccup that the elder worried he was going to suffocate.

It was then that Erwin Smith decided to step in, placing himself between the two brothers. “Calm down Eren. Levi is not sending you away.”

Eren's shoulders were still trembling. He was still crying as a result of letting loose, and now it was difficult to stop even though he wanted to. Erwin Smith could however sense that the other had understood.

Levi stared at the two uncomprehendingly at first until everything clicked and fell into place. His expression softened then. “You're an idiot, Eren, honestly.”

Still sobbing, Eren gratefully accepted the handkerchief Erwin offered to him, and rubbed his wet eyes furiously. Feeling shy, and more than just ashamed, he peeked from behind the folded cloth to finally look Levi in the eyes. Relief washed over him instantly because his brother really didn't look like he was about to kick him out. He was so relieved that he felt himself tearing up yet again causing Levi to groan in frustration.

“Now that you're done assuming things about me, will you please go to your room and pack your things. We're going on a trip. Understood? You're not going back to Frankfurt if that's what you were concerned about.”

Eren blushed in embarrassment. He nodded energetically, and was about to dash past the others when he screwed his face up in confusion – Levi somehow wanted to smack that dumb face.

“Why are we going on a trip though?”

Levi sighed. “I'm deliberately ignoring our relatives, however, I'm pretty sure more letters are going to come. I don't know about you, but I'm not up for dealing with the hyenas.”

“Are you running away from them?” Eren had the audacity to sound indignant.

“No, I'm telling them to talk to my aristocratic hand. In other words, I don't care, and I want them to know that I don't care.”

At that Eren finally smiled. “And you're inviting me to come along to make a point?”

“Good. Put your brain to good use.”

Instead of feeling insulted Eren only allowed his smile to widen just slightly as he strutted out of the library to do as he was told. To think of it, it was going to be his very first vacation, and now he even felt quite excited.

Without Eren around the mood surprisingly didn't improve. Erwin Smith and Hanji Zoe stared at Levi with what could only be described as underhanded accusation. The master of the house attempted to ignore them but they looked at him with their neutral faces while their eyes were screaming the deepest disappointment. Levi snapped.

“All right, stop looking at me both of you.”

“Levi, you really are not a winner in life,” deadpanned Hanji. “Poor Eren.”

“What is that supposed to mean? It's not my fault he had to jump to conclusions.” Levi furrowed his brows, and pinched the bridge of his nose.

Erwin patted Levi's back good-naturedly. “You see, I know you are spoiling him rotten in your own special way but sometimes you need to vocalise your feelings. Eren is warming up to you all right, and I think he's only able to do that because he knows you're actually a good person.”

Levi remembered the night Eren told him that he was a gentle person. “He...he's overestimating me.”

Undeterred, the blond resumed talking, “No matter how much you can share affections without words, it is also important to give vocal reassurance. That's communication. Especially when dealing with young men like Eren – even more so considering his background. He had no family, Levi.”

“You are his family now.” Hanji smiled.

“Are the both of you done giving me motivational speeches? Because I think I have to ask you to leave.”

“Still the worst host in all of Germany,” trilled Hanji. Despite everything she still rose from her comfortable seat, and tugged Erwin Smith along with her. “I wish you a happy time together, and don't do anything too risky.”

Levi narrowed his eyes. “Come again?”

The visitors only waved at him as they exited the library leaving him alone with his thoughts. He ran his fingers through his dark hair, and sighed heavily, something he'd been doing more often than usual in the past half an hour. Begrudgingly, he had to admit that Erwin and Hanji were probably right. They might have been slightly worse at dealing with relationships as the average person, but still better than him.

He owed them now.

* * *

It was only in the late afternoon that Levi finished packing everything he deemed essential for the trip. Not being a workaholic but out of a sense of duty he still decided to take his paperwork along with him. Now he was supervising the coachman load their luggage with watchful eyes, also making sure that nothing would be left forgotten. Eren only showed up when Levi was almost done leaving instructions for the head butler to follow during his leave, and he shot the younger brother a disapproving glare - which quickly morphed into a surprised blink.

Eren was struggling to carry his suitcase on his own as he refused to let a servant do the job for him, so he was slightly out of breath albeit radiating unconstrained excitement. The unusual part was Eren's choice of dress. Apparently, the prospect of a vacation was his cue to go all out casual, to the point where the Fürst looked like he was on his way to the emperor's wedding ceremony in comparison. Instead of his usual dress shirt and waistcoat, Eren was wearing a white short-sleeved sailor suit with trousers so short they were only acceptable for toddlers to wear. And he didn't forget to don a matching hat. And he looked so pleased with himself.

"Brat, where do you think we're going? Not to the beach, that I can tell you." Levi also noted that if Eren had looked mature during the mayor's birthday party, he sure made the opposite impression now. And being adorable in the process? Blasphemy.

Eren pouted. "I know that. There's no sea anywhere near here. But, but I figured we would be going to a big lake like the Bodensee - I heard it's nearly as big as the sea. You know, something like that. And we could chat up some ladies, what do you say?" He added a suggestive wink for good measure. Well, he would rather chat up a gentleman, but Levi didn't have to know that.

The other only reacted with a blank stare. "Firstly, the Bodensee is not nearly as big as the sea. And secondly, we are going up to a village in the mountains. And no, we will not be chatting up any ladies."

Watching Eren's expression fall with every word Levi said was fascinating.

"Then what did I wear this ridiculous outfit for?" Squeaked Eren.

"Hell if I know. You're an idiot."

Eren climbed the carriage with a whine. He grumbled something about never ever going to trust Levi again.

The first hour was spent watching the scenery pass by. Eren was still sulking. Then, tired of cursing Levi's 'unfashionable' lifestyle, he let his mind drift to hopefully other things. Unfortunately, he was involuntarily reminded of the misunderstanding earlier on. The memory replayed in his head, he relived the fear, and finally relief. Maybe he shouldn't have doubted his brother so easily, especially because he knew that Levi was better than that. But was he to be blamed? Any other person would have been insecure in such a situation.

He had been staring out, looking at nothing in particular, arms crossed and propped on the open window. The wind brushed against his face, and the ribbons on his hat whipped his cheeks. Somewhere in the process, maybe because he was recalling the events of the day so intensively, he was tearing up again. He didn't even notice.

But as usual, Levi did. "You are crying."

Eren blinked.

"Oh...sorry." He wiped his face with the back of his hand.

"Why are you apologising?" Levi frowned.

"I'm...just...sorry for everything? I thought you were going to send me away, and then...I did the embarrassing crying thing in front of your guests. Gosh I'm so embarrassed."

"You thought I was going to abandon you."

Eren blushed, but answered with a nod.

"Eren...why did you think that?"

The other struggled for an answer. He tried to sort his disarray of emotions into comprehensible sentences. "I guess I was comfortable with you, and I was content living with you. But the thing is, we were only ever alone together. And I forgot that the Thurn and Taxis family is made of more people than just the both of us."

"And it would make a difference, because?"

"Levi, it makes a big difference. You know who I am. If it's just you taking in a lap dog, then it wouldn't have been a problem, but what you're trying to do is making me member of the main family." Eren sounded exasperated, and he looked exhausted.

"I thought we had a deal."

"I'm starting to think that deal is stupid, and doesn't make any sense. No matter how you look at it, I'm the only one gaining anything out of this 'deal' of yours. I may be a brat, but I am _not_ shameless. Sorry of being aware of my place, and sorry for doubting that you were going to fight for my place in a family because realistically speaking it is not self-evident." All the words streamed out of him rapidly, and this time he maintained eye contact.

Levi watched the play of shadows on Eren's face as the sun began to set dipping everything in orange and red, light swiftly changing, parading different facets of the other's expression. There was a heavy silence. It was Eren trying to collect all the pieces, and Levi silently trying to tell him that it was okay, that he had understood.

Erwin Smith's words rang true. Sometimes, words are needed. No matter how terrible he was at the art of communication, if Eren had tried his best, it was only fair for him to return the favour.

“Come here,” he said.

Confused, Eren only stared back with his head slightly tilted. It was as if he'd just heard the other speak another language.

“Um...” he was about to ask Levi to repeat himself, though the glare he received clearly told him not to botch things up, so he nodded. Eren crossed the narrow space between their facing seats, sat down where Levi had made room.

Sitting down he felt more than just awkward. Before he could even do so much as open his mouth, he felt a hand grab him by the shoulder, and he was dragged down. In the blink of an eye Eren found himself laying on his side, head on Levi's lap. He held his breath. Frozen in place, he didn't dare to breathe.

“Oh for god's sake, don't play dead.”

“W-what are you doing?” Eren was still rigid in his position.

“I'm offering you my lap as a pillow, be grateful.” The Fürst's voice was monotone as usual, but something was nevertheless off. Maybe he was feeling awkward, too, thought Eren.

“I'm not tired yet, you know.”

“...Really? Hanji said that one usually would feel tired after a good cry. And you've cried twice today.”

“I'm not that weak,” pouted Eren.

Levi hummed non-committally, and looked out of the window. It was getting dark. “Crying has nothing to do with one's strength. Your tears were justified...and I suppose I owe you an apology.”

Eren's eyes widened in surprise. An apology was the last thing he expected. In the end both felt uncomfortable. But both also knew that it was necessary to talk it out, to finally gather all the fragments of unsaid words to define their relationship.

“I should have told you that I won't abandon you. I took you in, and here you shall remain, no matter what they say." 

Levi paused.

"You are my brother.”

Eren buried his face behind his hands saying muffled jumbles of words. The other looked down with a frown. “You aren't crying again, are you?”

“No,” was Eren's constrained, drawn out answer. “Gosh no, I'm just so embarrassed, you're so embarrassing when you try to voice out your affections.”

Levi was on the verge of snapping at the impudent boy. But Eren was laughing, so it was a good sign he supposed. He rolled his eyes when the younger began to shake in his effort to control the obnoxious giggles. When Eren had calmed down, a comfortable silence settled in. Wriggling around, Eren even managed to appreciate his position, enjoying the rocking motions of the carriage.

“When I was napping,” mumbled Eren, “I had a dream.”

He considered Levi's lack of answer a prompt to go on. “It was a nice dream...say, do you mind me acting like a spoiled brat?”

“You _are_ a spoiled brat.”

Eren chuckled.

“Could you please pet my hair?”

“Are you taking advantage of my apology?”

“Please?” Eren looked up with those bright eyes wide open, begging him like a puppy.

Levi sighed, inwardly doubting his authority, and removed Eren's ridiculous hat. It was, however, easy to follow said request. After all, it wouldn't be the first time. Just like before, he petted the soft hair as one would a dog. And indeed, he had wanted a dog for obedience, but instead got himself a spoiled lap dog. And now he couldn't let go of that dog.

Eren though was enjoying himself. The gentle fingers were brushing his locks, grazing his scalp, and rubbed behind his ear with expert motions. Blissful was one word to describe Levi's touch. He felt those fingers wander further down to the hairline on his nape, and he shuddered because it almost tickled, but mostly because it felt so good.

Eren felt his heartbeat quicken as memories of the dream came to life – the touches were so familiar, exactly like in the dream, only better because this time they were real. A voice in the back of his mind reminded him that he shouldn't lose himself in the sensations of Levi's caressing hand for it was not appropriate. Though for now he was going to savour every moment, and every contact of their skins. In a life otherwise filled with bodies clothed in layers, and gloved hands, such acts of touching were moments of profound intimacy.

Eren lazily moved his arm to take hold of Levi's free hand. He enclosed it in his, pulled it close, closed his eyes, and kissed the knuckles of his brother's hand.

“What are you doing?” Levi's voice sounded almost breathless, just a whisper in the quiet.

The Fürst watched Eren with searching eyes.

“My token of loyalty to you.”

It was dark, but he could see Eren's genuine smile just fine.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The E Rating is for Explicit Eren's wardrobe porn...Among other things of course. Also, expect artwork of his sailor outfit soon on my tumblr.
> 
> Footnotes:  
> Mozart loved writing letters. He also loved writing about poop. While such vulgar language wasn't that unusual during his time, I can imagine that the use of language had changed at the end of the 19th century. 
> 
> Bodensee is Lake Constance - it's situated in Germany, Switzerland, and Austria. 
> 
> \----  
> Also how do I keep the End Notes of chapter 1 from appearing on every single chapter, goodness it's killing me.


	5. Song Cycle - Dichterliebe

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Levi doesn't understand teenage boys.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back with a new chapter. Thank you so so much for your feedback and kudos for the last chapter. And once again, thank you for being so patient with me and my slow updates. 
> 
> The promised drawing of Eren's sailor suit [here](http://imperialharem.com/post/65071504981/apparently-the-prospect-of-a-vacation-was-his-cue). Also more [Levi](http://imperialharem.com/post/65097207987) (thought plot irrelevant huehue)
> 
> I don't know why, in the first chapter, Levi's mother is stated as an English princess. That is obviously bollocks. The correct information can be found in this chapter, along with an in perspective portrayal of the Thurn and Taxis family to those who still don't really know who they are and where they stand in the noble chain. 
> 
> Have fun reading~

 

The moment Eren stepped out of the carriage, all frustration about not going to the beach dissipated into thin air.

Never mind his initial exhaustion from the long and comfort challenging trip, the butt pain was worth it all. Now, Emmeram castle in Regensburg was nothing less than impressive with its size and intimidating halls that constituted the main residence of a princely house. But the summer residence was darling in his eyes. In the mountains, secluded from the nearest village, hidden by a small forest of oaks that eventually clear to reveal an English garden, was the holiday home of the Fürst.

Eren took in the bright eclectic façade with its many arches, gaze following the grape ivies that were partially crawling up the walls so the manor appeared to belong to the surrounding. Given that it wasn't typical German architecture, it actually looked like something out of a fairytale. And most importantly, the size was only a fraction of the Emmeram castle, hence it was bound to provide a cosy feeling.

Bright eyes glinted with gleeful anticipation, and Eren found himself stepping his feet back and forth, ready to make a run at the manor. Levi thought it was highly adorable. Also, he was feeling a tiny bit smug, since his brother had spent half of the trip either sprawling himself all over him, or nagging about the 'terrible' choice of a rural vacation. The elder admittedly didn't mind the former too much.

“Well then,” he threw the set of keys for Eren to catch, “why don't you take a look around the house? Choose any room you fancy.”

Eren's eyes widened like saucers – it was a funny sight. “You mean any room?”

“That's what I said.”

“Like...really any room?”

“Don't annoy me so early in the morning Eren. Just do it before I change my mind and make you sleep in the nursery, I doubt you could fit your long legs in that tiny bed.”

Eren smirked. “I bet you could, though.”

“Fine, hand the keys over, you're not going to choose your own room.” Levi extended his arm expectantly, face turned sour, the corners of his mouth twitching.

Eren, that obnoxious spawn of the devil, only cackled and skipped over to the entrance porch. Assuming the biggest key was intended for the front door, he wasted no time to insert it and turned. A click and a creak. He turned around, darted his brother a questioning glance. As he received a curt nod, he stumbled inside.

And he was not disappointed.

Very unlike Emeramm castle, the summer residence was not covered with golden stucco or marble pillars, instead it was dominated by cosy colours, wooden furnitures, wooden staircases, and cushiony rosewood armchairs. Natural light flooded the entrance hall that was directly attached to the parlour. Eren thought, he could definitely get used to this place.

“I love this place! I mean, it's not as nice as a lake promenade, but – it will do,” said Eren, distracted. “Also...would you mind if I were to take the master bedroom?”

Levi blinked. “I don't really care.”

“We could even share the room.” Eren didn't look like he was kidding, smiling away with his trademark enthusiasm.

“Absolutely not.”

His smile dropped. “Why not, though? Did you know that it's normal for siblings to share the room?”

Levi subconsciously gripped the handle of his cane tighter, and he felt a headache rise. “When they were children, yes. But we're both big boys now, aren't we? And there are plenty of other bedrooms in the house, even though this isn't the castle in Regensburg.”

A chuckle drew his gaze back at his younger brother. So he had been joking, Levi should have known. Still, he couldn't help but believe to have caught a glimpse of disappointment in the other's expression.

Eren ended up not taking the master bedroom after all, as it didn't quite offer the same amazing view as the room opposite to it. He was definitely ready to enjoy his first vacation to the fullest. It was also the perfect opportunity to get closer to his brother, he thought.

* * *

 

The first day was spent lazing around. They were both exhausted from the long ride, so even Levi couldn't bother to do anything more than just relaxing in the parlour while Eren was playing the piano that accompanied his own singing.

Levi was not passionate about the fine arts. He appreciated it, but he wasn't the biggest enthusiast out there. But he did think that one wasn't required to be well versed in art to enjoy Eren's singing. It was always straightforward and easy to understand. While his piano skills were average at best, he made it up by letting his clear resonating voice fill the room with melodious beauty.

It was a heart wrenching tune of falling in love, of kissing a beloved, of parting and regretting. Sad and pathetic, and at times Levi wasn't sure whether he should feel sorry or mock the poor sod in the song. The lines of tragedy and comedy were blurred. And Eren did a great storytelling with his singing.

He didn't notice the piano cease. So he was just a tiny bit startled when Eren's face suddenly popped up right in front of him to sing the final movement of the song cycle.

It was all Eren's voice. No instrumental company. Not even the sound of Levi breathing, because he wasn't.

Eren, immersed in his song, reflected genuine sorrow in his eyes, as he concluded the cycle. It was as if he had taken the role of the poet destructively in love. His voice was laced with the century's discarded and forgotten restless spirit. Never down to earth, always soaring.

“ _And bring me too twelve giants, who must be mightier than the Saint Christopher in the cathedral at Cologne. They must carry the coffin and throw it in the sea, because a coffin that large needs a large grave to put it in._

_Do you know why the coffin must be so big and heavy? I will also put my love and my suffering into it.”_

* * *

 

Later in the night Eren tossed and turned in his bed. Not because he was unused to the new feel of the unfamiliar room, but because his heart was in his throat. Wide eyed, he grabbed his chest and willed himself to calm down, to no avail.

He didn't know what to do with the way his whole being seemed to be so drawn to his brother no matter what. It always resulted in him doing stupid things like asking to be petted, sharing a room, performing the finale of a song cycle up close. These things over the course of two days. Simply because Levi had called him brother.

The clouds cleared. Moonlight filled the room with a gentle light bright enough to cast shadows of the trees and their leaves softly billowing in the wind. He watched them intently and reminisced.

Eren remembered his mother as the only constant being in his life prior to her death. What followed was him living a stagnant life whereas the world was ever moving. Nothing stayed, nothing remained. A lot of things went by, lingered awhile, then faded and disappeared.

Life was like a monotonous song on repeat.

Until Levi entered his life. He was an interruption of the song's tonality. He was new and disorienting, unresolved like the Tristan chord.

It was their shared blood that drew Eren to Levi, that made him want to get closer. Friends were important – Armin was important – but there was nothing that could ever ensure they would stay forever. Consanguinity was different. Levi had confirmed that they were brothers. And now...

Only death could do two of the same blood apart.

* * *

 

Just how many of those sailor suits did Eren own anyway?

Levi watched his brother across the rim of his cup of coffee with twitching eyebrows. Unlike Eren, he had decided to stay under the cooling shades of the front porch, stiffly seated by the coffee table. Stiffly, because somehow those legs were very distracting.

Eren had picked up a couple of wooden sticks by the forest, and even though he was already fifteen he still could become a warrior, soldier, hero or whatnot just by holding those. With a bit of fantasy, sticks became swords.

 _Boys,_ huffed Levi silently.

The little brother had been running around the garden all morning, and it was past noon already. Where did he muster all that energy? He could already see Eren's skin tanning under the glaring sun, which unfortunately (fortunately?) served to emphasise those legs against the white short excuse of trousers.

The poor gardener had become Eren's victim.

“Young master, what...? That's dangerous,” whimpered the gardener.

He rose both gloved hands in defeat, dropped his shears in the process, and stepped back to avoid the poking sticks. Eren, however, wasn't going to leave the young man be. He snarled theatrically from his battle position.

Levi had to admit – Eren knew how to look intimidating in a sweet sailor suit. Though, really, those legs.

“You are the colossal titan! Your deeds are responsible for humanity's downfall,” growled Eren, and shoved the sticks closer towards the gardener's chin, who had started to break out in cold sweat. “Be prepared to face your slow and painful death!”

“No, please young master, make it quick.”

“Someone like you doesn't deserve any mercy!”

The assaulted flailed desperately. “But I was only trimming the hedges!”

“It was a pretense, wasn't it? You were planning to destroy these enormous walls, weren't you?” Eren furiously pointed at the hedges that barely reached his knees. “Just you wait. The humanity's strongest will take you down with one blow.”

Levi noticed that Eren was now staring at him.

Ah. So he was supposed to be the so-called humanity's strongest. But Levi couldn't be bothered to leave the comfortable shades for the sake of some child's play. Undeterred by the intense stare, he kept drinking his coffee. “I believe in you, Eren. You can...slay that giant titan on your own.”

“It's the colossal titan,” corrected Eren.

“Colossal titan.”

Pretty legs groaned in frustration and dropped his sticks. The gardener took the opportunity to escape; the hedges could wait.

With an annoyed expression, Eren approached Levi. He sat down right next to him on the cushioned bench. “You ruined the game.”

The Fürst didn't even pretend to look apologetic, he merely shrugged his shoulders. “I'm too old to be playing around in the open like a kid.”

That only set Eren off. “I'm not a kid. And you should have some fun once in a while, you know. That's why we came here in the first place. Silly brother.”

Silly brother sounded too damn adorable. Was it bad that he wanted to pinch the boy's cheeks, or maybe even those tanned thighs? Yes, definitely bad.

“Pray tell, what made you think I wasn't having any fun?” He waved his copy of some French literature – the unread one, because he was too busy getting distracted by Eren's choice of dress.

“Gosh. That won't do.” Sneakily, Eren attempted to snatch it away, if only he had moved faster. Levi lifted the book up above his head lazily, and regarded the other with an unimpressed expression. Though, it was under the assumption that the book was out of Eren's reach – as fate brought it about, Levi wasn't blessed with a tall body.

Sticking his tongue out, Eren leant forward, knees propped up on the bench, and he extended his arm to reach for the damned book. With an annoyed grunt, Levi reclined – not about to give up just yet. The younger brother had been so sure that he would succeed, so he was caught off guard by the sudden movement of the other leaning backwards, and ended up stumbling forward, nearly crushing the elder.

The next thing was them awkwardly wrestling on the bench, as both were too stubborn to relent. Eren didn't even know why he insisted, he only acted on impulse. He wriggled with strained mewls, because he wanted Levi to drop the thing, and finally look at him only.

Somewhere along the line, Levi had become rigid, nearly unmoving. Their position had quickly become very uncomfortable in more ways than he was willing to admit. He was almost flat on his back, one bent leg that previously served to ward Eren off was now straddled by the boy on top of him. They looked like a mess of limbs, and somewhere in that mess, Eren's crotch was rubbing Levi's leg.

That loose sailor suit rode up to reveal more of Eren's bare skin, and to his horror, the free hand that had been pushing the boy away was underneath the fabric, squeezing against his stomach. Countless profanities whirred in his head.

Because of Levi's lack of movement, Eren was finally able to snatch the bloody book with a triumphant shout. Jumping on the chance to rub his victory in his brother's face, he shifted his head with a shit-eating grin – only to be met with Levi already staring at him.

It was not the disgruntled stare he had expected. It was one that made him self-conscious. That finally made him realise their position. He let his gaze drop, as he shifted to lift his body, but to his embarrassment found himself rubbing against Levi's leg. At this point he should have just wrenched himself free and laugh at Levi's loss. Instead, his gaze was drawn back to look in the other's eyes.

Those eyes spoke of strength and sincerity. And now something else entirely, too.

_When I look in your eyes all my pain and woe fades …_

His gaze wandered lower to the set of thin lips, pressed together to form a straight line. And he wondered... _Will I become whole when I kiss his mouth?_

Levi was the one to snap them back to reality, though it took him all of his willpower. And when he spoke, his voice felt foreign, breathless and raw.

“It's time for luncheon.”

“I bet,” replied Eren with the same broken voice, eyes still somewhat glued to those lips.

* * *

 

One day Eren asked about the paintings on the wall of the parlour. Those were portraits of Thurn and Taxis family members.

Levi started with a painting of their grandfather, the first of the Princely line after the abdication of the Holy Roman Empire's imperial crown. Next to it was the portrait of his wife, Duchess Therese of Mecklenburg-Sterlitz, the sister of Queen Luise of Prussia. What followed were several other family portraits of their children and relatives.

Finally, they stood in front of a painting they recognised as that of their father. There was no explanation needed. Eren's gaze shifted towards the portrait of his lawful wife, a Bavarian duchess of the House Wittelsbach. It was the Bavarian royal line, making Levi a relative to the king and the current Austrian empress. Somehow, that fact came crushing down in a sinking realisation. This whole business of taking him in was a whole big deal. No wonder everybody in the family would voice their protests.

No longer able to look at his father and the woman portrayed next to him, as if they were able to watch and reject him, he opted to observe a still life painting instead.

A nudge made him look up uneasily. “Um...Levi...”

But Levi did not let him finish; only tugged him along with him to a chest of drawers. Ignoring the confused looks he received, he opened the second drawer, retrieved a leather bound object. Wordlessly, he offered it to his brother.

Eren hesitated for a moment, then accepted as curiosity got the better of him. Tugging on the leather strings, he let the binding fall open.

Instantly, his gaze softened. He smiled.

His mother smiled back at him.

“Thank you,” whispered Eren and pressed the photography tightly against his chest.

* * *

 

Jean Kirschstein was the unwanted bastard child of the village's Catholic priest.

And as such, he tended to be the community's punching bag. So he was stuck sweeping the cemetery while the rest of the townsfolk was attending Sunday mass. Everybody knew, the priest was only willing to cater for him, because his mother was a blackmailing mastermind.

He was already so familiar with the neat rows of gravestones, he knew the names of the dead bodies occupying them by heart. On lonely days, he would even greet them. God knows his stay in this damned village would one day cost him his sanity. It was bad enough that he had one day picked up a morbid skull, of which half of it was missing, among the loose earth that had been prepared for a funeral – took it in, and named it Marco.

Alas, poor Marco!

Jean was currently raking the leaves when he spotted an unknown boy approach the church's grounds. He looked sort of disoriented as he stood by the wall next to good ol' Gertrud's grave, staring at the church entrance.

It didn't take him too long to figure out who it was. The topic of the priest's bastard did get boring as years went by, so everybody readily latched themselves onto the new rumour mill like starved newborns once they learnt that the Fürst was present, bringing along with him an illegitimate prince.

So that had to be the younger brother of the Thurn und Taxis Fürst waiting for him to come out of the Sunday mass. Jean did hear something about the brother being a protestant. Frankfurt was a protestant city. So obviously, they wouldn't attend mass together.

Jean's eyes narrowed. That violent looking visage looked pretty godless, though. Very suspicious. He wondered whether _hello, bigger bastard_ was an unacceptable greeting.

“Hey, little princey boy, what did your mum blackmail the Fürst with?”

The other boy spun around faster than he could rethink his choice of words and shot him the fiercest death glare of intense blue-greens he'd ever seen. Apparently, there was no kidding around with princey boy. Next thing he knew, the noble was closing their distance, and instantly, Jean regretted his words. He wanted to tease, but wasn't eager to deal with overly angry kids.

“What did you say, horse face?” Princey boy's voice was dripping acid, determined to bite itself through anything.

“You called me what?” Jean gripped the rake tighter and narrowed his eyes into dangerous slits.

“One of Levi's horses looks just like you. The spitting image.”

“Take that back.”

“Maybe that's your long lost mum?” Eren cringed at his own words, but this complete stranger was asking for it.

“Leave my mother out of this!”

“You started it, prat.”

They stared at each other with fuming anger, just about ready to go at one another in a fist fight if one were to add just one more drop of insult. But Jean deflated his temper. It was true, he had started it. There was no good reason for him to direct all his frustration at the princey boy just because he had been luckier than him. Being accepted into the Princely house surely meant that he had to deal with perhaps even bigger problems regarding his status as a bastard child. Still...

“My bad...” murmured Jean and averted his gaze.

The little apology was fortunately enough to appease the other, and he too dropped his clenched fists that eventually loosened.

“It's alright. Your mother doesn't look like a horse.”

Jean smiled.

“But you do,” Eren added.

 Jean hated princey boy.

Levi left the church together with the Sunday crowd and stifled a yawn. The priest was unnecessarily close to him as he provided him with the information he had demanded. It was strenuous to stay focused on the cleric's words when his voice was permanently stuck on monotonous preaching mode. His eyes fell on Eren who seemed to be arguing with someone. He couldn't pick up what they were shouting at each other, but he'd never seen his younger brother so unrestrained.

He had began to wonder whether the Prussian officer incident was even true, given that Eren was nowhere as impulsive in front of him. Even though Eren was brave enough to be a cheeky little thing in front of him, he'd never once become angry at him. This other boy, Eren had only met him today, and he was already seeing a side of his brother he'd never witnessed before. And now they were even laughing. Levi furrowed his brows in confusion. Weren't they fighting just seconds ago?

“...About the exact time...your highness?”

The Fürst blinked and tore his gaze away from Eren, back to the priest. “I'm sorry, you were saying?”

The priest nodded. “As always, he will be headed towards Hohenschwangau castle in the afternoon.”

That definitely piqued Levi's interest. “Today?”

“This afternoon, yes.”

Giving the cleric a curt nod, he took his leave. Brisk steps carried him towards Eren who was still animatedly engaged with the other boy. He looked like he was spewing some more profanities, but didn't seem to hold any malice.

“Gosh Jean, you can't tell me you let that girl ride you next to the cemetery.” The young noble looked scandalised and intrigued at the same time.

“Could you please stop the horse references?”

Eren grinned widely. “Never.”

“You little shit. I'll never tell you how to get yourself a piece of a nice, curvy girl. I bet the ones in the city ain't even as fiery as the wonderful country girls.”

Inwardly, Eren thought that it wouldn't be a big loss to him, since he was sadly not interested in women, but he still pulled a mock disappointed face.

“Eren won't need your advice, young man.”

The voice made Eren jump and put on the sweetest smile. It was so sickeningly different, Jean wasn't sure he was seeing the same guy as before. The complete switch of character made him stare at the other with an incredulous expression – was Eren even serious?

He watched those big eyes light up in excitement and look at his brother with utmost adoration. His whole body language had changed, it was downright creepy. Jean wasn't sure whether Eren was doing it on purpose or not, but one thing he couldn't deny.

The happiness in those vibrant eyes was real.

“I gotta go, Jean. Do greet Marco for me, maybe I'll meet him next time.”

Jean grinned at the other and patted his back as a friendly gesture, blissfully unaware of the icy gaze locked on him. “Got it. Take care, princey boy.”

Eren rolled his eyes and left with his aristocratic brother. With raised brows, Jean watched the elder wrap his arm very much protectively around Eren's waist. (The waist because he was too small to do it around the taller one's shoulder?)

* * *

 

They were riding down the country road in the afternoon, as Levi had uncharacteristically suggested. But he was being awfully slow, and refused to leave the road to explore the considerably more interesting open fields. So they stayed on the road along the forest edge. Maybe Levi was more of the relaxed type when out riding, he was an old man after all.

As if Levi was able to read his mind, he was rewarded with a disapproving glare. Eren gulped and slightly led his horse away. On top of acting secretive, Levi was in a bad mood for some reason unbeknownst to him.

“Say Eren.” Levi was still frowning, but his tone was thoughtful rather than angry. “Were you fighting with that boy? Why?”

Eren fell back and let Levi ride ahead just so that he could catch up with a faster trot for the sake of spicing up the old man walk. He ignored the annoyed groan. Brushing his mare's mane, he hummed and tried to recall the reason why they had argued.

“We weren't really fighting when you came. But we did before that. He asked me what my mother did to make sure that I get adopted into your household.”

Instantly, the Fürst's mien darkened. Need he pay that kid a visit?

“Jean is such a dickhead.”

“So you hate him.”

“Yes. I hope I'll see him again soon. That twit.”

Levi would never be able to understand children.

Eren seemed to have fallen silent in favour of regarding the landscape. He supposed the brat didn't see such vast open fields very often, having been an urban person all his life. So it was endearing to watch him widen his eyes at the sight of a roe deer jumping out of the woods to the meadow. He swore he had heard a muffled squeal.

Truly, Eren was ecstatic to see such vast lands and no buildings in sight. It gave him a sense of insignificance, but at the same time also liberation he'd never felt before. Now he knew why Armin craved to see the world. There were other, far more impressive vastnesses of nature out there.

As far as his eyes could reach the horizon was a chain of majestic mountains so high the peaks were covered in a blanket of perpetual snow. His heart was beating like a drum.

About to voice his excitement, he turned towards his brother. Whereas Levi appeared to be on guard now – fingers tightly curled around his rein, posture tense, and expression on edge, as if waiting for a certain moment. And now Eren could hear it too, the sound of hoofbeats and wheels rolling over rocks and twigs. A carriage was getting closer from their opposite direction.

Levi had been watching it from between the gaps of the pine trees, his eyes eventually lit up in recognition. Pulling the rein, he looked up at the confused teenager. “You stay put. Don't interfere.”

Finally, a luxurious looking coach of burgundy colour with gilded leaf ornaments appeared around the curve of the road. Eren instinctively moved to the edge to make way for the broad vehicle, which was definitely owned by a gaudy aristrocat.

However, Levi seemed to be taking the opposite direction, sped his horse up towards the centre of the road. Eren could only stare as the bizarre scene unfolded. The horse was as reckless as its master. The coachman in charge of the carriage was horrified by the sudden obstacle, face reddened in panic, he frantically willed the horses to come to a halt. A laborious shout, several high pitched neighing – Levi's horse reared for a moment, and Eren feared the male would fall off in the process, but he didn't. In fact, he looked very much impassive.

Once the coachman had managed to halt his horses, he turned to yell at the impertinent peasant who had just given him the fright of his life. His bellow, however, died in his throat as he realised that he wasn't at all facing a peasant. Now he only looked uncomfortable, wanting to shout but couldn't.

Someone spoke up from the inside of the carriage, and the coachman twisted his body to spit out his stream of apologies.

“Oh dear me, I just lost control of my stallion. That was a close call,” drawled Levi.

Eren was puzzled by his behaviour.

With a soft creak, the door at the side of the coach opened, the voice was louder and clearer now. It was younger than Eren expected. At first he could only see a bowed head, as the person climbed off of the vehicle. He was tall, and wore a classic frock coat, tophat in hand. Perfectly polished shoes touched the ground gracefully, and he straightened his body with poise.

Finally, Eren caught a glimpse of the nobleman's face. Dark, perfectly groomed wavy hair, a serious countenance, handsome, but with youthful, daydreaming eyes. Definitely not a gaudy old aristocrat. In fact, it wasn't any aristocrat.

It was the man, whose photography was lovingly treasured in Eren's suitcase. In front of him was the man surrounded by opinions of scorn, mockery, adoration and worship.

Eren had always liked the heroic types better, but even he couldn't deny the attraction of someone shrouded in myth with a beautiful frame.

Not once in his dreams did he imagine that he would meet Ludwig II, King of Bavaria in the middle of a bumpy road on the countryside.

“Your Majesty,” greeted Levi whilst dismounting his horse with a nimble swing. “What a curious...coincidence.”

Coincidence my ass, thought Eren with narrowed eyes. He had been waiting for the king to pass the road.

But why?

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Goodness. This chapter was an up and down of many different moods, wasn't it? This chapter leads to the main arc. So stay tuned.  
> Footnotes:  
> Eren was singing a song cycle of 16 songs made of poems by [Heinrich Heine](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Heinrich_Heine), composed by [Robert Schumann](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Robert_Schumann). The things in italics during the scene when they had eye sex are also from the song cycle.  
> The century's discarded and forgotten restless spirit refers to the first half of the 19th century, the period of[German Romanticism](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/German_Romanticism).  
> [The fascination of sticks](http://youtu.be/mL0zWuQXh1E)  
> And then there are a bunch of names of historical figures that are related to the Thurn and Taxis family tl;dr.  
> And finally, the wet dream of tourists in Bavaria: [Ludwig II](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ludwig_II_of_Bavaria)"""


	6. Habanera - L'amour est un oiseau rebelle

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When love stares you in the eye but you’re too 19th century to see and accept.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been so long (again). I hope you are well, and had a great start into the new year. 
> 
> This chapter is probably the longest yet. I hope you'll enjoy it. 
> 
> Also, I made a picture guide of this fic's universe, which includes pictures of real life locations, and additional historical trivia. It's on my tumblr [HERE](http://imperialharem.com/post/68302465839/for-the-lovely-readers-of-my-19th-century-ereri)
> 
> Happy reading!

“It is the beginning of summer, Your Majesty. The sun will not set for a while more. So I am sure Majesty is inclined to spare some time for an old friend.”

That was how Levi invited the king to join him on an afternoon walk— with words expertly uttered, yet they lay unsuitably on his lips. Just like how he had explained the apparently sheer coincidental nature of their encounter in the middle of a country road.

And so his majesty accepted the offer without much ado, rounding out the complete farce of a situation that was unfolding right before Eren’s eyes. The boy had no choice but to keep himself steady on his horse lest he embarrass himself and his following generations by falling off of it in front of the one king whose face he greatly admired. Though maybe falling off would wake him up from a dream— for nothing, not the king, nor Levi’s odd behaviour, felt in any way real.

“I would be delighted to accept your kind invitation and learn about your wellbeing. I do still consider you my family, even after the passing of my aunt, your beloved mother. And you know that.” The corners of King Ludwig’s lips turned up to form a kind smile, and Eren found himself staring at the pronounced cupid’s bow.

“Mother has been dead for years. Why would you even bring up your familial sentiments now?”

And just like that Levi was back to being his old self. For some reason Eren was relieved he didn’t have to worry about his brother suddenly turning into one of those compulsorily small-talking noblemen who liked to pussyfoot around in public.

The king’s smile only widened, and he casually straightened his jacket with amusement evident in his eyes. “I was only going with your flow, my friend. But enough of that.”

He let his gaze shift away from the Fürst towards Eren, and he observed the young man curiously. Upon so suddenly being noticed, Eren didn’t know how to react, so his shoulders stiffened, and his hold on the rein tightened until his knuckles turned white. He was not ready to face the king at all; didn’t know what he should and shouldn’t say, didn’t know how to act appropriately without making a fool of himself.

“When were you going to introduce your companion to me, Levi?”

Levi followed the king’s view. He silently ordered Eren to get off of his horse and come closer. It was done reluctantly but without any further complications. Eren found his footing steadily, straightened his back as he swallowed any visible signs of nervousness, and approached both men with casual enough steps (he didn’t want to look like he was trying too hard).

In all his effort to make a good impression, he’d however completely forgotten to smoothen his brows, making him look perpetually angry, or in Levi’s words constipated. Which was why Levi decided to draw the king’s gaze away from Eren’s face for a moment. He placed one arm behind the back of his nervous brother to take over the talking part.

“May I introduce to you my younger brother Eren? We’re currently residing in our summer residence to breathe in some country air. Eren is only used to the rotten fumes of Frankfurt— figured I should take him to a more healthy environment from time to time.”

At least those words worked to release Eren’s tense expression, as he was now looking at his brother in disbelief. Frankfurt wasn’t that bad, he wanted to interject.

King Ludwig made a noise of understanding, but then paused, staggered by the information. “I didn’t know you had a bro- oh...I see. So you’re that Eren.”

Eren gulped.

“Forgive me for being so rude, where are my manners. It is of course a pleasure to meet you, Eren. A dashing young prince, isn’t he?” Ludwig offered him his hand for a shake, and he was smiling, and those eyebrows that made him look capricious lifted oh so enchantingly, Eren thought there ought to be some ethereal sunbeams shining down on this heavenly creature. He strongly wished he wasn’t already blushing.

“Eren, why’s your face so red all of the sudden? Do you feel constipated?”

Eren closed his eyes and cursed the heavens.

“No, brother dear. I’m just fine,” he hissed. “It’s just the heat, I promise.”

This time he even managed to flash a coy smile towards the king, and he firmly shook the offered hand. “It is an honour, Your Majesty. I’m sorry to have disturbed your journey. Levi can be reckless sometimes.”

“That is true.” Once again the king was smiling. And Eren felt like he was about to melt away.

* * *

 

Levi hadn’t given Eren his permission to join their walk, so he was stuck watching both men go with a dejected heart, sulkily propping his hands against his cheeks. He watched them from the window by the piano as they slowly disappeared into the forest. But just before they were about to completely vanish from Eren’s line of sight, the king turned his head just slightly, and their eyes met. The boy removed both hands from his face hastily, and he’d almost banged his head against the piano’s lid because of the abrupt movement.

He felt like a fool.

* * *

 

“Your brother is very handsome and such a darling, isn’t he? He doesn’t look like you at all.”

They followed the small road lined by young trees, moss and ferns. It wasn’t a particularly big or thick forest, so there was plenty of sunlight shining through. Levi’s cane bumped against pebbles as they walked in a slow pace.

“He takes after Lady Carla.” Levi’s encounters with Eren’s mother were few, but he did remember her strong features. Meeting Eren for the first time had felt like seeing her again.

“You too resemble your mother.”

“That may be.”

They continued in silence. The king decided to enjoy the peaceful scenery and the sounds of the forest. Eventually, he himself broke the silence, now that he could see the village come in sight. He stopped walking, and Levi followed suit.

“The people are wondering why you’re no longer visiting the palace. You didn’t even come for the new year’s greeting.”

Levi shot the king a blank look.

“You know exactly why, Ludwig. Though I’m not sorry at all... you’ve become an awful king during these months.” Levi took to drawing patterns with the tip of his cane on the ground. “Not that you ever were a good one in the first place.”

Ludwig scoffed. “Honest as ever.”

“You stopped trying, that’s the difference.”

Words of denial never came.

“There’s no place for the King of Bavaria in a unified Germany.”

The Fürst stopped drawing.

“Where is your place then?”

It took a moment for the king to answer that question. He seemed to have detached himself as he was now looking at nothing particular, just gazing into some place far away nobody could see.

“I wanted half of the emperor’s crown. I wanted the crown to pass between Berlin and Munich.”

“I heard about that, you lunatic.”

The king chuckled, but he was still not looking at Levi. “That obviously didn’t work out. And now my place is somewhere else. Maybe I should found a new kingdom on some faraway island. With my own constitution— a place where I can once again, no, finally be a king by the divine right.

“And a castle, Levi. A castle on a rock up high overlooking the kingdom. And the golden ages of kings and queens, of knights and heroes would come to life once again.”

Levi watched the king lose himself in his land of dreams, and frowned at those spoken words. He’d always known him as someone prone to daydreaming, never much interested in the duties of a king, but very fascinated by the idea of _being_ king. But now that Bavaria had become part of a unified Germany, of which the emperor is the king of Prussia, Ludwig considered himself stripped off of his sovereignty.

„You’ve given up on your people then,“ said Levi coldly.

„ _My_ people are the same people that had been running on the streets, celebrating a unified nation.“ Ludwig edged closer, his trembling voice dangerous.

Levi looked up, undeterred despite the difference in height. „You can dream of anything you would deem your place, but it is not your place to feel betrayed by your people’s will. These are different times, Ludwig. This is no longer the time of gods.“

Levi wouldn’t usually have a care about Ludwig’s views, but him retreating from his active role as a king would not play out in favour of his plans. Not now when everything was at a breaking point.

“You act as if you and I aren’t the same.”

“We are not the same, Ludwig.”

“Oh but you too have given up.”

Swiftly, Levi jerked away and turned his back on the king, face seething with bottled fury. He fumbled with his cravat, loosened it just to fix it again; all the while moving to return to the summer residence. “You can’t compare my petty personal issues to the things concerning you.”

“True. But you must forgive me for wishing to pay you back for your harsh words against me when you are not that much different at least in nature.” Ludwig followed the Fürst with leisurely steps. “Also, I know what you’re trying to do. I know exactly why you pulled that little admittedly very badly executed play in order to stop me on the road.”

Levi shrugged. Figured Ludwig would be one to criticise someone’s theatrical performance even during such a situation. “I’m not an actor.”

“That you are not. So I presume you are requesting my aid in adopting Eren into your family?”

The Fürst paused and let his eyes linger on the dry leaves rustling by his feet. “If it isn’t too much trouble, I would like that very much.”

“You are actually asking me for a favour in a polite manner?” The king raised his brows, intrigued.

“Because there is no time. Bavaria’s special privileges in retaining its sovereign rights only apply for the bloody beer and spirits taxes, the regulations regarding settlement and citizenship rights. Also you remain supreme commander of your own army in times of peace. But I don’t suppose the judiciary will be in this kingdom’s hands any longer. And an adoption must be settled at court after all...if the empire is going to follow Prussian State Laws then I won’t be qualified for requesting an adoption.”

“Because only people of at least 50 years are allowed to adopt?”

Levi nodded. “But at the moment we’re still stuck in a bureaucratic disarray; it takes time to enforce such a big change in structure.”

Ludwig rubbed his chin thoughtfully and hummed. “You need me to smoothen the process, to manipulate public opinion about it by giving your intention my approval, and to keep your relatives at bay. That is a lot of things to ask.”

Finally, Levi turned to face the king again, showing the other his determination to assert himself. To the king, it felt like the old days. “Will you do it?”

“I’ll think about it.”

“Will you do it in a timely manner?” Levi pressed on.

“I need to get to know your dear brother first, of course.”

“Why? You said he’s handsome and a darling.” The impatience was showing in the way the Fürst was fiddling with the silvern handle of his cane.

“Well, a pretty face alone isn’t going to ensure me he’s suitable for the Thurn und Taxis family. It is very much of my concern, too. Your good name is mine as well.”

* * *

 

Eren had a secret talent.

It was more of a pastime to amuse himself whenever he was left with nothing to do but count the ticking of the hour. Also, he did feel a romantic mood settling itself at the pit of his stomach; and yet he didn’t feel like singing songs about lamenting a maiden slipping away from his grasps.

He wanted to sing songs of ardent infatuation, more cheerful, and admittedly a tiny bit seductive. And he knew exactly the song, or more precisely, aria suitable for his current fancy.

Because that was Eren’s secret talent.

A long time ago he discovered he was capable of hitting high notes in the vocal tessitura of a mezzo soprano by using his falsetto voice. He was of course unable to do it with his modal voice, and it was by far a different quality than what a castrato was capable of achieving, but it was still a rare gift.

Over the years he had worked to perfect his techniques, simply because he liked being able to sing a wider range of song types. Being able to sing songs written for a female soprano gave him the freedom to be anything on his mind’s stage. It was liberating as well— vocally tossing one’s emotion up high to the sky.

Eren started playing the tunes. They sounded exotic, whimsical, and playful with all the jumping notes. It was a woman seducing and playing with a lovestruck young man, so Eren closed his eyes to get into the character. He smiled, took a deep breath to begin the French aria.

_Love is a rebellious bird_

_That none can tame,_

_And it is well in vain that one calls it_

_If it suits him to refuse_

_Nothing to be done, threat or prayer._

_The one talks well, the other is silent;_

Oh, somehow he could picture those two men vividly. And the mere thought made him want to jump in shame, then bury himself underneath a hill of pillows, because each fancy was worse than the other. Both were unattainable, both were a sin before god. And the second one would probably count as a twofold sin. But he wished to be granted at least the permission to keep the feeling in his heart, treasured and locked away forever.

The dancing fingers on the piano’s keys slowed down just slightly, and Eren lowered the pace of his singing, as he had suddenly turned somber.

_And it's the other that I prefer_

_He says nothing but he pleases me._

* * *

 

Seeing the king return from his spontaneous walk with the in his eyes crazy excuse of a Fürst was a relief for the coachman. He didn’t like straying away from his given duty procedure, as it usually meant matters would become unpredictable. And a lowly servant like him did not feel a particular eagerness towards experiencing any adventures of that kind.

So he had refused to wait in the kitchen with the other servants. Instead he was waiting by the carriage with eyes glued to the spot where the king had disappeared with the nobleman, hoping that Fürst Levi wasn’t there to carry out an assassination. He didn’t look much like a trustworthy man.

As they entered the clearing where the mansion was situated, they were still deep in conversation.

“How will you go about getting to know Eren?” asked Levi who was growing more and more frustrated the more time he spent with the king.

“With letters of course.” King Ludwig did not make a beeline towards his coach to Levi’s disappointment, but rather walked in the direction of the summer residence.

Probably wanted to bid Eren goodbye, Levi thought. Somehow, he didn’t like it, and would like to avoid any unnecessary encounters between the two. There was something in the way Eren was eyeing the king that was bothering him. A feeling he was forced to be familiar with quite often these days.

“Don’t you have somewhere to be? It’s going to be dark soon, you know.”

The king chuckled. “You suddenly seem eager to get rid of me.”

Levi was about to make up an excuse, but both were interrupted by the sound of a piano playing, and a female voice singing.

Instantly, the king’s eyes lit up in excitement. He’d rarely ever heard such a rough edge on a soprano before, even though he was very passionate and knowledgeable about opera. The voice’s odd trait had the effect of making a sung emotion more intelligible and graspable, which was highly engaging for the listener.

“Who is the one singing? Levi, you’ve got to tell me.”

“The only women in this house are the cook and the maid, and I can’t imagine them helping themselves to the piano,” mumbled Levi. Did Eren have friends from the village over?

“I suppose you have a guest, then.” Ludwig careered along the low hedges by the wall, not at all minding looking like a creep. Reaching the window from whence the tunes emerged, he peered inside. He had to squint a bit as the piano was at the other side of the room right next to another set of windows, and the last bit of sunlight streaming through them made it hard to see anything more than silhouettes.

But it was enough to know for sure that it was no woman singing.

“So? Who is it?” asked the lord of the house.

Grabbed by his own curiosity, and too impatient to find it out the proper way, he tiptoed to get a glimpse inside.

He almost staggered at the sight. “God help me, this boy is going to be the cause of my death.”

“It’s not the first time he’s surprised you, it seems.”

“The next time he’ll be screaming bloody murder on me with a knife in his hands while dressed in frills for all I know.”

“A brother full of surprises, lucky you. And nice legs, too.”

“Go home, Majesty. Eren’s legs are off limits. I mean, you are not to bother him at all.” Levi narrowed his eyes threateningly.

The king didn’t seem to be remotely bothered by the other’s tone. “Be happy, for my interest towards your brother has just increased immensely. I am a lover of arts, and an avid supporter of people creating art.”

Suppressing a relieved sigh, the coachman watched the king climb back into the coach. The journey had been delayed for far too long.

* * *

 

Eren was no longer playing by the time Levi returned. And he didn’t see him at dinner or at the following day’s breakfast.

It was the hour before luncheon when Eren finally emerged from his self-inflicted isolation like a protesting child which had been forced out by its own hunger. Though Eren did not look upset but in every sense exhausted.

Levi paid no heed to him, choosing to go over reports on the family’s business sent from Regensburg. He was however forced to acknowledge his brother, as he felt a pressure on his right shoulder. Eren sat next to him with his head lolled to the side, letting it rest on Levi’s shoulder. The elder ceased his reading and raised his brow. He tilted his own head; it knocked against Eren’s. He heard him hiss.

“Don’t think you can be clingy now. Skipping shared meals without prior notice is extremely rude— so you will be punished with my disfavour.”

Eren groaned. He shifted his body to bury his face in his brother’s collar; freshly pressed with a clean smell, and a touch of his cologne. The base note of the fragrance was deep and rich, and Eren was sure it would become stronger if he were to move his nose up to the nape of Levi’s neck. But that spot was not appropriate for him to touch.

With Eren’s head tucked under his chin, Levi was no longer able to read, and so he could not ignore the other’s presence. He really should have been angered by the lack of obedience. But he couldn’t muster the will to feel that way, not when Eren was so physically close to him. The fact that he was so aware of the touches, and not necessarily within the scope of etiquette, worried him. Though not enough to push his brother away.

It was all right. Nobody was looking.

“Where were you, Eren?”

“I’m sorry, really. I had a lot to think about, you know.” His voice was muffled by the fabric of his collar. “It’s not easy to be a young man.”

Levi snorted humourlessly. “What do you know of hardship just yet?”

“I mean…” Eren considered his choice of words, but it was soon abandoned by a frustrated grunt. “You wouldn’t understand anyway.”

Levi pondered whether he should make Eren spill it. “Are you okay?”

He was definitely not okay. Eren did not consider swooning over a king, and being kept restless and awake by the mere thought of his brother in any way okay. It was already a natural disaster that he had a great inclination for the same gender, but couldn’t he be more ordinary in his own romantic selection?

Idolising the king was bearable, although meeting the actual person was pushing him to the edge of hysterics. It was his feelings towards Levi that was bothering him to the point of losing sleep. At first he was able to pass it for the elation of finally being in a family again. However, the longer they spent time together, the harder it was to deny the surfacing desire to constantly touch his brother.

Why couldn’t he simply fall in love with Jean the priest’s bastard son? (He did not dare defile Armin with such thoughts)

But Eren wouldn’t want to worry his beloved brother. “I’ll be fine. I just need to charge some energy.”

“By sticking your filthy nose to my collar?”

“Exactly.” Eren giggled. “By the way...what was yesterday about? Has anyone ever told you that you couldn’t put on an act to save your life?”

“Yes, just yesterday in fact.” Levi gritted his teeth. “I always thought I was decent.”

“Well, yes, if it comes to your own emotions. But performance isn’t your talent.” Eren sat up, and looked at his brother expectantly, waiting for an explanation.

“I was waiting for him to pass, as I knew that he would take that road during that time.”

“Why?”

“I needed a way to meet him without having to visit the royal palace in Munich,” he said. “I do not particularly prefer frequenting that place, you see.”

Levi wasn’t looking at Eren anymore. The hand that was not squashed under Eren’s weight traced the edges of the documents next to him absentmindedly.

“Whatever for?”

“To help us make you an official member of Thurn und Taxis.”

A momentary silence settled between them. Eren let the information sink in, contemplating whether he should lose his nerves, or whether it was perfectly normal to ask kings such favours.

He decided to be cautious. “And? What did he say- hold on. I thought you wanted to go on a vacation with me because you wanted to make it clear to  the rest of the family that you don’t care about their opinions.”

Levi rolled his eyes. “As if I would do something so immature.”

“So you planned everything, and lied to me about wanting to go on a vacation?”

“Oh for god’s sake Eren, don’t you look at me like that.”

“Like what?”

“Like a wounded puppy.” There was something powerful in the way Eren’s eyes widened whenever he was upset, or how his lower lip would quiver just slightly. Enough to make him feel guilty. “Anyway, we did have a leisurely time, with or without hidden agenda, didn’t we?”

“I suppose.” Eren didn’t sound convinced, but at least he wasn’t guilt-tripping Levi with a face laced by betrayal.

“As for His Majesty...he agreed to consider my request if you agreed to initiate a letter correspondence with him. Something about wanting to get to know you. I personally think he’s just being unreasonable, and couldn’t resist his penchant for pretty things. That pervert probably has some ulterior motives.”

“That’s horrible!” Eren cried out.

“I agree.”

“What if he wanted to conduct said ulterior motives on me? I haven’t done anything like that before.”

Levi stared at Eren incredulously. “What the hell, boy?”

Realising the unfortunate slip of his tongue, Eren almost choked on his own words. “I’m sorry...of course I meant to say that I will be glad to exchange letters with the king. That’s hardly a compensation for what you’ve asked of him, Levi. So we better be grateful.”

* * *

 

How did one go about writing a letter to a king?

It was a struggle to do it right, especially since he had refused any help from his brother. For the first time, Eren actually sat down in Levi’s study, recalling every lesson on letter etiquette he had acquired back at the castle. Herr Freytag’s and Hanji Zoe’s words echoed in his memory on a loop.

Postal cards were not appropriate for private correspondence as they were considered cheap, lined paper was also frowned upon. One may not underline words for emphasis, and only let one’s vocabulary express the emotions one wanted to convey. No abbreviated words; in case of misspellings, replace paper and recopy the letter. No refolding the letter, either, so he had to do it right on the first try to fit it into the envelope.

And the most important question was the matter of language. Did he use a more formal and distant language, or was he allowed, even expected, to address the king more privately?

_To Your Majesty,_

_By my brother’s word of mouth, it has come to my person’s knowledge, and my heart delighted upon such news, that Your Majesty wishes to become acquainted with me. I must admit, I do not possess the ability nor the experience to measure up to others who are more worthy of your time. Yet I shall gratefully, and wholeheartedly attempt to convey my character by means of ink and paper to you._

_That is to say, I am overjoyed to be granted the honour and pleasure to have finally met you in person, which had been a year long dream of mine; a dream made reality by my dearest brother’s whimsical ways. I do envy your shared relationship, and can only dare to wish for ours to evolve in the same fashion._

_Again, I apologise for my maladroitly written greeting to you. I hope this letter finds you well._

_Yours faithfully,_

_Eren M.L._

The few short paragraphs were written over the span of hours and hours of confinement in Levi’s study (who was banned from using it for the time being), and with the help of written references available in the small library. Levi’s letters were of no use since Eren wasn’t able to find a single personal letter; granted those were of course to be kept personal. And to be frank, Eren could not imagine his brother using a flowery language. They were alike in that way, though Eren found himself able to adapt if need be.

But he was so proud of the outcome. True, there was not much substance in what he had written, but the first letter was about presenting himself, also in a way that would reflect well on himself in order to be a convincing prince (yes, he hadn’t forgotten the main goal in his euphoria).

* * *

 

A reply arrived just two days later. Sooner than the brothers had expected.

_Dear Eren,_

_Your letter finds me well, in fact, it was the wellspring of mirth in a day filled with nothing to bring me joy. You shan’t think of yourself so lowly, as I find you to be very lovely to behold, and a pleasant companion from what your way with words suggests._

_Do not feel the need to address me so formally in a friendly letter, it only serves to sadden my heart. Friends call me Ludwig. So please bestow upon me the benevolence of your voice referring to me by my name, and not something that is but a title._

_Speaking of which, I chanced to hear that you are in possession of a voice so precious, songbirds and angels ceased to sing to give ear to your melody. I wish you would let your king hear your marvelous voice._

_Yours truly,_

_Ludwig_

“What are you giggling about so early in the morning?”

The letter arrived during breakfast, and Eren almost tore the envelope apart, until he realised that he ought to treat it with utmost care. But maintaining one’s composure when being showered by such words of flattery usually reserved for courting a lady was impossible to Eren. He barely managed to not knock the little vase of freshly picked heartseases over in his inability to stay still.

Levi eyed the letter in Eren’s hands warily, as he dipped his knife into the jar of strawberry jam, already hating the idea of a friendly correspondent for the sake of winning Ludwig’s favour.

“It’s just...he’s so charming, isn’t he?” Eren said. And he was positively glowing, and most importantly, flushed red.

The Fürst only huffed in response. “I hear that ladies faint in his presence. Nothing to be proud of, though. That’s just a disturbance of public peace in my humble opinion.” Levi stated haughtily.

But Eren was too far up in the clouds to even notice his brother’s jibe.

“Did you tell him about me singing?”

“Why would I?” Levi’s breakfast tasted horrid in his mouth. Maybe the bread was too stale, or the jam too sour, or his tea too watery. But looking at Eren’s happy face made him want to puke and fire his cook.

“Why are you in such a terrible mood?”

* * *

 

After the third letter, Eren finally knew the reason behind Levi’s deteriorating temper.

Each time he would tell his brother about the king’s compliments to him, and each time Levi would only acknowledge him with a gruff reply or snide remark about Ludwig’s ‘phony’ language.

The signs were clear. Levi was jealous.

Words in the languages he knew were too few to even describe the happiness he felt. Naturally, it was accompanied by a tiny feeling of guilt, as he was feasting on someone else’s woe. So he silently apologised to his brother for the furtive smiles that would spread across his lips whenever Levi was suffering under Ludwig’s constant presence, which was a solely written presence.

But Eren couldn’t fight down the urge to fuel his brother’s jealousy, and he found himself wanting to see just how far he could push it. And he did it by overacting his joy towards receiving the king’s letters; furthermore, he had made it his habit to read every single flattering line out loud.

Even after they had returned to St Emmeram castle they resumed the correspondence. The contents became more intimate, now that Eren had overcome his initial inhibitions. Music had become a primary topic during the days. While Ludwig’s knowledge was vast and very thorough, Eren’s was only limited to his practical ability. But somehow, such details had long ceased to matter, for they were perfectly capable of carrying a conversation in spite of all that.

As for Levi, he was developing an aversion for letters coming with a royal seal in the morning. The contents were never particularly long, and yet it seemed like they were taking away a substantial amount of time that was usually spent with Eren. King Ludwig was taking over their life. King Ludwig’s letters were taking over their life.

Of course he was aware of the ridiculous nature of his perpetual disdain towards the letters, which obviously brought happiness upon Eren’s eyes, but he couldn’t stop the ugly feeling of jealousy. Those pages and pages filled with elegant writing were their gateway to their goal, but Levi would rather toss them into the fire.

“Ludwig has been bugging me about singing again,” Eren said; and he could barely hold back his pleased grin. “I seriously don’t know how he knew.”

Levi could pinpoint the exact day and time in which Eren had replaced ‘His Majesty’ with ‘Ludwig’.

“We might have heard you once. You were singing a soprano, though.” Levi did not look up from reading the papers, but he could feel the other stiffen. “Don’t worry, Eren. It’s an impressive talent.”

Eren wasn’t so sure. He slumped back in his chair, and kicked his legs back and forth. “Do you think so?”

“Ludwig thinks so.” He wished he would stop sounding so bitter.

“Have you ever thought that my voice could make angels and songbirds cease singing to listen to me?”

The rocking of Eren’s legs annoyed him.

“That’s badly exaggerated, isn’t it? No, I never thought that.”

“Ludwig did.”

 _Hundred points for Ludwig and zero for me_ , Levi thought. And maybe minus fifty too, because Eren looked severely disappointed, and he was at fault. Again.

* * *

 

One day Eren barged into Levi’s study without bothering to knock. The door slammed open; a very out of breath Eren breezed in without a care. The boy was flushed, as if he’d just returned from a manhunt, but he was smiling.

Levi looked up in disdain. “Ever heard of knocking?”

A tranquil working environment was something he desperately needed. That and sleep. The dark hues under his eyes were worse than usual— the result of working to the late hours, administering the plans of establishing a bank, funding the restoration of St. Emmeram’s Abbey, and stopping the castle from leaking rainwater. Sometimes he wished he wasn’t living within a castle bigger than the Buckingham Palace. The pomp wasn’t worth all the trouble.

As if those weren’t enough to keep him from getting a good night’s sleep. But recently, he found himself spending the nights thinking about Eren and his stupid letters, Eren and his stupid smiles, Eren’s mouth uttering ‘Ludwig’ more often than ‘Levi’, and by the end of the night, when the sun was already rising, there was nothing left than self-loathing.

And lack of sleep did not go well with boys running around the hallways, banging doors right and left.

Eren remained unfazed, noting the other’s bad condition but being far too excited to dwell on it. He skipped towards Levi’s desk. “So, I was wondering…”

“The answer is no.”

Eren’s face fell. “I haven’t said anything yet.”

The Fürst rubbed his temple and sighed. “What is it?”

Nodding, Eren sat down and leaned forward. “Ludwig asked me to perform at the State Opera.”

That was unexpected. “In Munich? Are you even adequately qualified?”

The Bavarian State Opera was globally renowned, and an opera company with a long history. The king used to frequent the opera house with him to witness his favourite composer’s first showings; and while Levi was an appreciating layman at best, he did understand that a high standard of skill was required.

Eren grinned. “Apparently. Can I?”

“Who are you going to perform?”

The other hesitated for a moment, eyes shifting in discomfort. “The opera is Herr Richard Wagner’s Tristan and Isolde.”

“He’s a bit of an odd chap, but a great composer, yes. You should be proud to be offered a small role in it.” It shouldn’t be too bad to let Eren explore his talent, as he had always deemed it a bit unfair to keep his brother’s voice reserved for his own listening pleasure.

“The thing is…” Eren’s voice dropped in volume, and he looked up at his brother with unsure eyes. “It’s not a small role. I’m offered to be Isolde.”

“The _female lead_?” Levi’s voice cracked. “Who in their right mind would even suggest such nonsense?”

“His Majesty, actually.”

That was to be expected, Levi thought. “Well then...write in your sweet little letter that I won’t let you.”

“I can’t.” Eren was only whispering now.

“And why not?”

“Because he is here. In the castle...waiting in the hall of mirrors.”

Levi hated how everybody in his circle of acquaintances was prone to giving him unannounced visits.

* * *

 

The hall of mirrors was a state room, which meant that it was amongst one of the most lavishly decorated rooms of Emmeram Castle. Designed to impress even a head of state, the baroque hall with its many mirrors was only rarely used. But the visit of a king was certainly a good enough reason to put it to good use.

Yet there was nothing festive about the atmosphere surrounding the palatial room. Not when there was a small figure quickly pacing in circles, close to him his brother and the king himself.

“And I shall repeat it again and again. My final answer is no,” hissed Levi.

“Eren is perfectly capable of doing it, Taxis. With a bit of practice he will be flawless.” The king smiled patiently, patronisingly— and it annoyed the Fürst immensely.

“He can be the greatest Don Giovanni out there for all I care, he will not be performing a lead role. He’ll draw too much attention.”

“Why is it a bad thing?” Eren interjected. He was quickly silenced by Levi’s death glare.

“Is this just a game to you, Majesty?” Once again he was looking into an expression which was far too gleeful. “I asked you for a serious favour, and this is how you answer to a friend’s plea?

“Here I am seriously trying to adopt Eren into the main family, already facing the other members’ disapproval, and you’re going to make it worse by making the future family addition an _actor_? I might as well try to adopt a prostitute.”

“ _Levi!_ ” Eren cried out. He looked like he was verging on tears.

Levi almost instantly regretted his own words. A heavy tension settled between them.

“Forgive me, Eren...I didn’t mean it.”

The problem remained. Lead actresses and actors were celebrated personalities. They were famous. And while their status had improved over the centuries from being equal to prostitutes to actually becoming celebrities, their standing was still considered unacceptable within circles of old noble houses. And if Eren was to become a lead actor, in a female role even, Levi was sure that every single relative was going to use it against them.

Eren swallowed the feeling of hurt. “Your Majesty? Is it alright if I were to use a stage name instead of my actual name? May I perform not as a man singing Isolde but as a woman? I will be wearing a wig and paint on my face, so it shouldn’t be a problem. I really do not want to cause my brother any more distress.”

The king contemplated Eren’s proposal, and couldn’t find any fault in it. That way he could listen to Eren’s singing, and Levi wouldn’t have to worry about said boy’s reputation.

“It’s a good idea,” said Ludwig.

Eren turned to face Levi with inquiring eyes. And the Fürst sensed that he was losing against that hopeful expression. Eren’s idea was not without any risks, but Levi was still feeling guilty, and so he found himself with no other choice than to relent. He only nodded as a sign of approval.

Both Eren and the king lit up in joy. The younger brother lunged at Levi, and planted a quick kiss on his cheek. A brief touch that left his skin burning, and his mind in a state of confusion.

“Thank you so much,” Eren whispered.

“So, Eren. You better pack your things and be ready to depart.”

The set of brothers looked up with blank expressions. “What do you mean?”

“Well, the performance is in three weeks, and Eren has to practice with the company, naturally. So he ought to be following me to Munich.”

That would mean both were going to be separated for three weeks straight.

Neither knew whether they were ready for that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lazy footnotes:
> 
> -Eren is a sopranist. A male singer able to reach the vocal range of a soprano through technique. (He can't sing soprano with his normal voice, so he has to use falsetto)  
> Trivia: the castration of boys before puberty to make it possible for them to sing soprano, mezzo-soprano or contralto was made illegal in Italy in 1870. But the number of castrati had already diminished during the 18th century, so there were rarely any in the first place. So Eren's talent is quite a ittle sensation.  
> -The aria Eren sings is Habanera from Georges Bizet's opera Carmen. Actually, Carmen was first performed in 1875...but Eren is a time traveller. 
> 
> Once again, thank you for reading and supporting OuO


	7. Fairytale King

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am trash. Such a late update again :')

Eren was leaning by the balustrade in front of the castle's main entrance. Next to him his brother who was busy keeping a watchful eye on the suitcases currently being loaded onto the carriage. He watched the footman buckle the straps around the luggage to secure it, and was pleased to note that it would probably survive even the rockiest of roads.

King Ludwig was already seated inside, insisting on giving the brothers a chance to bid their farewells to each other. None of them however knew what to say as they were still trying to digest the dawning reality of having to be separated for such a long time. And how curious it was, for though they were initially used to living alone, the prospect of having to be apart was a foreign feeling for some reason.

„You didn't forget anything?" Levi asked distractedly.

„No, I'm fine." Eren watched a colony of ants trying to reach the bottom of the staircase.

„Did I give you enough money?"

„Yes, you did."

„Are you sure? What if there's an emergency?"

„Then I'm sure you'll come running for me."

Levi's eyes were still staring at the already perfectly secured suitcases, but he did sense Eren's gaze on him. The boy wanted him to say the words. Levi wouldn't say. But he would do it without a second thought— that he had to admit to himself. "His Majesty will cater for your needs."

There was a deep sigh next to him.

"Will you miss me?" Eren wondered.

Again, Levi wouldn't say the words his brother so desperately wanted.

"I'll miss you, Levi. So think of me even just for a bit." That said, he stepped around the ants, avoided crushing them with his feet, then skipped towards the waiting coach. The door was held open for him, but he didn't climb in immediately, instead turned around to lock eyes with his brother for one final time. Maybe he was still hoping for affectionate parting words.

Levi's heart hammered in his ribcage, he feared it was going to burst through, and drop on the floor, wilting away in misery. There were so many things unsaid, but definitely thought of. And Levi pleaded for Eren to somehow understand, to read his eyes (which were probably a raging storm of grey in the language of poets). But this was Eren; he did not do reading humans where it counted. And so he stepped into the coach to be taken away.

One did not know how to lend his emotions a voice, and the other couldn't read beneath the layer of skin.

In hindsight it was maybe better for them to be parted, Levi mused. They had allowed their relationship to steer towards a direction he did not dare to think about. Having to share a life with a sibling was something he wasn't familiar with, but he was sure that getting jealous, and losing sleep were things usually reserved for a not-sibling. And it was better to build a distance before any disastrous feelings could further develop between them.

Thank god for Ludwig's ingenious idea. He was a saviour. Levi nodded in self-assurance. The carriage drove past the gate, and it slowly disappeared in the distance.

"Shit. Eren, come back."

But Eren was long gone.

* * *

 

Eren was surprised to see just another face smiling at him. He had climbed in with more than just a heavy heart, so he was unaware of the other presence next to the king. And now he felt embarrassed.

The man was beautiful. Eren didn't think he'd ever seen someone like him before. His smile was kind; a set of gorgeous blue eyes spoke of endless patience, and a sense of tranquility surrounded him. For a moment he was able to forget his worries. Instantly, Eren could tell this was the king's special person.

"Hello, Eren. I'm Richard Hornig."

* * *

 

The king could not convince Eren to live in the royal residence during his stay in Munich. Eren preferred a small apartment near the opera house to make his way there easier, but he agreed to always dine in the palace. To be honest with himself, it was an act of compensating. Pushing Levi's jealousy used to be a good idea at first, yet in the end it seemed only childish, and resulted in him brooding over his own regret. They were separated without any openings for Eren to somehow fix their situation.

Eren stretched himself with a groan, spread his arms wide open, and closed his eyes with a deep intake of breath. He lingered in that position, tried to empty his mind. He then rocked on his heels, back and forth, back and forth. And he let himself fall backwards onto the bed, eyes still closed, enjoying the thrill of initially having nothing to support his back— and cried out in pain.

He had miscalculated the size of his bed, being used to a bigger one at home, and ended up banging his head against the wall. He recoiled, and curled himself up with both hands grabbing the back of his head. Apparently, he had emptied his mind too much. His eyes filled with tears from the pain, and he buried his face into the sheets, just to discover that the mattress wasn't as soft as the one at home. Gripping the pale green sheets, he felt his lips tremble.

Eren kicked his legs frantically, and let out a muffled high-pitched scream into the fabric, much like a frustrated child with no way to vent in a satisfying manner.

He already hated Munich.

* * *

 

The next day didn't weigh him down as much; enough to make him reconsider his opinion about Munich which felt a lot like Frankfurt in its size and atmosphere, calling forth a certain sense of nostalgia in him. Walking towards the opera house proved to be a chance to gather a refreshing first impression of all the colours, sounds, and characters of the city...and of course also the local taste.

Stuffing his face with two sweet buns, getting sidetracked by a booth selling candies in all the colours of the rainbow, falling for the lady's seduction by buying a rabbit shaped lollipop, because according to her the shade resembled his eyes— with all these it was easy to forget the time. Only the chiming of bells from the church towers could finally remind him that he was already running late.

Eren cursed without a care— his central German accent surfacing, and drawing some attention to him while he sprinted across the Max-Joseph square, a bulging satchel hanging down from his shoulder. The National Theatre Munich was an unmistakable building on the large square, and Eren climbed the stairs, his whole figure dwarfed by the sheer size of the corinthian order of collumns.

Still grabbing onto his sides from the physical exertion, he looked for his changing room behind the stage. Luckily, everybody was already gathered in their shared dressing rooms, so he didn't have to meet the other actors and singers just yet. Eren made a point to at least wear his wig before leaving the apartment the next time he would leave for practice as he entered his personal dressing room, which was a privilege reserved for the, and Eren sighed inwardly, prima donna of the opera.

"So...this guy is going to be our prima donna?" A blonde girl by the name Annie looked him over, and her unwavering gaze made him feel very uncomfortable.

Eren was now standing on stage with the other actors and actresses, having just been introduced by the conductor, already with brunette ringlets falling down to his waist, and a plain blue dress of which the drape was uncomfortably sticking to his thighs. Also feeling utterly mortified by the giggles surrounding him.

"You didn't really try to make it believable, did you?"

Eren recalled that miss blank face Annie was cast for the role Brangäne, Isolde's maid. At least that fact was a little consolation to him.

"This is just for practicing purposes, alright?" Eren said, naturally being defensive, and more than just slightly miffed by the unfriendly greeting. "It's just to get me into the role of Isolde. And nice to meet you, too."

He couldn't mention that he was also preventing them from getting too familiar with his face.

"And so...Milkah was your chosen stage name, wasn't it?" Another girl with hair gathered and tied back in a ponytail spoke up with her hand eagerly waving. She had previously introduced herself as Sasha. "Is it true that you're a distant relative of King Ludwig? What was the story? Erm...the Prince of Palmyra, a city on an oasis in the Ottoman Empire. That's sooo exotic!"

Eren was proud of his fabricated background story that he had managed to tell some of the other singers backstage.

Reiner, the bass voice of King Marke, unceremoniously jammed his elbow on the curve of Eren's shoulder, making the boy wince at the impact. "Pretty sure Palmyra was an _ancient_ city, meaning that it's non-existent by now. Also, your accent sounds suspiciously like my aunt's."

"Where does your aunt live, Reiner?" Sasha asked.

"At the feet of the Taunus mountains north of Frankfurt."

The crowd, even the instrument players below, roared in laughter as Eren's ears gradually turned a deeper shade of red.

"Well, that's foreign enough, I guess." Annie added with a smirk.

Eren's boiling anger could not be undone, not even by Reiner's good-natured pat on his back, one that only managed to knock the air out of him.

At the very least, Eren noted with a great deal of satisfaction, his demonstration of Isolde had once and for all shut their noisy traps. Well, maybe not, because some of them were positively gaping. He couldn't help but feel smug over his achievement.

The newfound respect for him did not stop them from teasing him, though as the days progressed he had learned to accept it as friendly banter. And annoyance was often mixed with playfulness. It was a completely new experience to be surrounded by so many people that were not held back by a filter or restraints of etiquette, and incidentally also shared his passion for dramatic singing.

He had trouble sleeping at night, what with Levi still haunting his thoughts in his lack of presence, but he always looked forward to attend the practice sessions in the following mornings.

* * *

 

"Your clammy hands are ruining my powder, Bertholdt." Eren said.

The group groaned. The orchestra ceased to play.

Sensing the accusatory glares of others, Eren jerked his body away from the nervous tenor playing Tristan, and challenged them with his own pair of piercing eyes. "What? Firstly, I can't feel the hot romance going on when his sweaty palms are basically melting my face away, and secondly, it feels gross okay?"

The theatre director sighed. "You two are ridiculous! Bertholdt, you're far too nervous to be convincing. And Eren, stop making excuses just because you can't admit you're weirded out by the intimate scene."

"I'm not weirded out!"

"Yes, you are. Amateur." Annie didn't even raise her voice, but Eren could hear her perfectly. And he couldn't stand the sight of her leaning against the props with a bored expression, as if she knew it all.

"I'm not an amateur, just because I'm not too eager to touch and eye-fuck this trembling Tristan over here, does not make me an amateur. You better take that back."

"What would you do? I didn't offend the king's darling, or did I?" The fact that Annie wasn't even putting on a mocking face, as if he wasn't even worth the trouble, drove him mad.

"Wait 'till my brother hears about this," hissed Eren.

Annie opened his mouth to retort, but was stopped short by Reiner jumping into the scene with a laugh filling the opera hall. "Alright, jealous maiden, young master with a brother complex...we should all take a break."

Still fuming from the squabble with Annie, Eren stomped his way towards his dressing room for the sole purpose of _privately_ venting his anger, which would include a livid moment of pacing around, with tensed up shoulders and clenched fists, a chant of colourful language, and furiously glaring at his own reflection until the urge to punch the mirror would dissipate. He didn't get to go that far, as he was seized by the arm, and dragged into the shadows behind the stage, pressed between the set decorations.

A heavy arm circled his neck, leaving him breathless. "Gosh darn, Reiner!"

Reiner laughed. "Do all noble sons talk like you, or is your brother unaware of your potty and bratty mouth?"

"My brother is flawless, I don't even have to raise my voice. Well, we sometimes have troubles communicating, because we're stupid like that...but...why am I even telling you this? What do you want, jerk?" The way the resident prima donna was sending him one death glare after another made Reiner wonder whether they would be able to fool the audience about Milkah's gender.

"Relax. I just wanted to help you, since you're an amateur and all."

"I'm not an amateur," said Eren with a pout.

"You don't earn your life's wage in this business, boy." Reiner glowered, and Eren gulped.

Suddenly, he realised that he really had been a bit of an arrogant brat. The people here were professionals, and experienced in the field of performing their talents, and above all their hard work. And then he came, someone only the king deemed acceptable, and acted as if he owned the company. Upon that realisation, Eren felt embarrassment rush through his body.

"Sorry…"

"Nevermind that. I just wanted to give you a good advice to help you internalise the passionate moment between Tristan and Isolde."

Eren's face lit up, and he eagerly nodded his head, prompting Reiner to continue.

"You in love, Milkah?"

Well, that was certainly an odd question.

But Eren figured that artists tended to have a roundabout way to make a point. Reluctantly, very reluctantly, because it would be officially admitting, even to himself, that he was in fact in love with a certain someone, he nodded. By god it felt like the gates of inferno were opening up beneath his feet, ready to swallow him whole, and send him through all nine circles of hell. At the same time it was liberating.

"Good," Reiner said, pleased. "Now I want you to listen carefully."

Eren knitted his eyebrows in concentration, and leant closer, in fear of missing any valuable information.

"Later, when you're home, you've got to do this one thing. You imagine the face of your beloved lady, I bet she's pretty and sweet. You imagine her smile…"

Levi being pretty and sweet, Levi smiling— nonexistent things. Eren stifled a snort.

"...and then you jack off to the fantasy of her."

Eren stared at Reiner's face shrouded in darkness.

"What?"

"Er...you take your god-given sausage in your hand, and then you stroke it like this…" The other let his hand hover in front of his crotch, then proceeded to pump the air while maintaining a straight expression."

"I know about jerking off, oh my god will you stop doing that?!" Eren slapped the obscenely moving hand away. "How is that supposed to help?"

He thanked the heavens above that it was dark, because otherwise his face would have betrayed everything. Naturally, he wasn't a stranger to the act of masturbating, but doing that with images of Levi buzzing in his head was unthinkable. Just thinking about it was almost enough to make him implode. The warmth in his cheeks equalled the shame he felt. He should have known better than expecting a serious advice from Reiner.

"Because you know, Tristan and Isolde's relationship is full of sex. It's very explicit, and I often doubt the romance of it. But of course, while we can't show actual explicit scenes on stage, we can get it across with the intensity of our play of expressions, body language, and voice. As you said before, it's eye-fuck."

And you obviously look like you've forgotten that hot spark, because you can't connect with the scene. Remember that desperation of unfulfilled desire— let it peak to the point of being ready to jump your Tristan then and there."

Eren eyed the other with a sceptically arched brow, but was unable to shake off the feeling that Reiner had just delivered him something profound. At least somewhere in the very core of him telling the boy to masturbate to the image of his heartthrob.

"I'm pretty sure there are other ways...anyways...thanks for the advice, I guess?"

It was a good enough answer, apparently, as Reiner's head was slightly pridefully tilted that Eren was now met with the sight of the other's nostrils, and pursed lips ending in upward curves. "You can always count on me. Now, I think Bertl is in dire need of the very same inspiration. You know, he's not the regular Tristan, either."

Eren found himself pitying Bertholdt who would soon fall victim to the bass's words of wisdom.

* * *

 

It was a good decision to live outside of the palace. The times spent with the king were nothing but a disillusioning experience.

He had always had a certain image of King Ludwig. An image of someone surrounded by dreams and all the little fragments fairytales were made of. And in truth he was all that and some more.

However, upon observing the king for almost two weeks, Eren realised that Ludwig was _solely_ made of dreams, of swan knights and heroines, of castles and Wagner's tunes.

Surreptitiously glancing at the monarch as he was lovingly being tended by the equerry and personal attendant Richard Hornig, Eren regrettably thought that a king who wouldn't even see his ministers, and only reluctantly showed himself to his people, was useless after all.

"You look absorbed in your own thought." Richard Hornig placed a hot cup of sweet-smelling tea in front of him.

The boy smiled sheepishly. "I was thinking about how devoted you are. It's impressive, really."

Hornig joined him. "What's so impressive about it? I serve His Majesty. It's my duty."

"No, I mean," Eren rubbed the back of his neck, unsure of how he should put his thoughts in words, knowing full well that he was treading on precarious territory. "I mean, you do so much more than just serve. It's a bit frustrating to see that you don't get as much in return as you deserve."

The other only chuckled in return. "His Majesty's love is always true. Even though there are many things he loves, whether it be a song, a beautiful actor, a fantasy, or me, I can be rest assured that the love is true."

"But you're _sharing_ that love. It's not fair!"

"I don't mind." Richard Horning was perhaps the only person in the world who wouldn't mind, Eren thought.

"I would only want my beloved person to be mine, and only mine. I was never raised to share."

* * *

 

The Fürst in his big castle was frustrating over his work. You would think that the absence of a certain loud boy would aid his concentration, yet Eren filled his mind even more. The first week had been the worst, and he was embarrassed to admit it. It made him even more aware of the space surrounding him. Everything was too big, too tall, too empty.

Levi's fountain pen glided across the paper in lazy strokes. He was dutifully responding to the official and at times also personal letters he received. There were two trays on top of his cylinder desk, both containing a good amount of letters yet to be opened. His eyes narrowed at the second tray with three envelopes neatly arranged in a row. He immediately recognised the seals. One was from the house of a duke, then that of an earl, and the third from another princely family.

His valet had refused his request to dispose of those kind of mails upon their arrival out of respect towards the senders. Levi scoffed and made a mental note to chuck them into his waste bin once he was done with the day's work.

The ache all over his back was telling him to give it a rest, but he was determined to read just one more letter. It was a plain off white envelope, nothing official. Flipping it around he was surprised to see that it was from Eren. His eyes flickered over the name written in blue ink, again and again, almost as if it could somehow make the space around him less lonely. He slit it open using a paper knife, his poor heart making little jumps as he did so.

Like every other first reaction concerning Eren he was annoyed.That brat had spent hours for each letter meant for the king, but the one he received looked like something his brother had written during breakfast— the red jam stain right next to the sloppy signature said it all. At least Eren had tried (but failed) to wipe it away. And the words were far off from the flowery language he had used for Ludwig. He hadn’t even tried. The carefree nature of the letter was either disrespect or a privilege. 

_Dearest Brother,_

_I_ _'_ _ve been meaning to write to you sooner, but got caught up in work. I_ _'_ _m practicing all the time, now that Herr Wagner too has joined the sessions. And I tell you, he_ _'_ _s a weird man, and maybe a little over the top because he_ _'_ _s the king_ _'_ _s precious composer god. I_ _'_ _ve always heard that opera singers were actually free to mould their performance to their own liking, but no, Herr Wagner wants the actors to wear the costumes that are exactly according to his imagination, wants them to act in a certain way (what_ _'_ _s his business? He_ _'_ _s the composer, not the director!)._

 _He keeps ranting about how his ideal is to unify all works of art via theatre_ _—_ _that music, acting, singing, and dancing should work together and strive for the purpose of creating one ideal piece of art. Old man is a big dreamer. And the truth is I really do admire that_ _…_

Levi blinked.

 _...But I_ _'_ _ve been weary of dreamers these days._

He flipped the page.

 _I_ _'_ _m a dreamer, too. Maybe I_ _'_ _m also weary of myself?_

 _I_ _'_ _m sorry, I shouldn_ _'_ _t be boring you with my petty problems. Anyways, all in all I_ _'_ _ve been having a good time. I hope you aren_ _'_ _t overworking yourself over there, god knows I think you would do that without me around to pester you._

 _Whenever I have time to myself, I always think about you. We didn_ _'_ _t part on very good terms, and I really regret it. I can_ _'_ _t wait to see you again, because I really, really, really miss you. You are probably frowning at these lines, scolding me for being so childish. But I_ _'_ _ll just take advantage of our distance, and tell you all kinds of embarrassing things without risking you kicking me to the moon._

 _I miss you. I miss you teaching me questionable literature. I miss eating with you_ _…_

 _I miss you petting my hair whenever you_ _'_ _re too ashamed or prideful to praise me for a work well done._

_Please take care of yourself. Sorry for the stain; consider it a kiss mark._

_Your Eren_

Levi set the letter aside and grabbed for the next envelope. There was still so much work to do.

* * *

 

In the night, provided it wasn't too late or he wasn't too tired, Eren would always read different written adaptations of the Tristan and Isolde legend in his bed— from twelfth century poetry to contemporary novels. It wasn't like he was terribly eager to read stories from the Middle Ages, but the opera performance was most likely his one and only opportunity in life to appear on stage, and he was not going to disappoint himself and the others.

Eren hoped to gain a deeper insight into the relationship of Tristan and Isolde, however it was akin to running his head against the wall. How was he supposed to make a convincing performance? Richard Wagner wouldn't settle for any generic perfect vocals.

After a good while of brooding, Eren finally let out a frustrated groan, the open book covering his face, as he had grown tired of holding it in a lying position. He remained motionless in that position, his chest regularly rising and falling.

But surrendering was not something he would usually do. Overcoming the temporary feeling of defeat, he once again lifted the book. He flipped the pages until he was at the part where both Tristan and Isolde— the captor and the vengeful lady— fell under the influence of a love potion. Eren once again read the lines carefully, biting his bottom lip while doing so.

And it was true. Infatuation caused by a love potion, vengeance turned to passion, all reason replaced by blindness— Eren could almost taste the restless heat building in the bodies of the couple, a heat that had nothing to do with love. It was pure lust.

He was embarrassed for some reason.

The book was far from describing anything explicit, but Eren was fifteen years old. Imagination was not lacking on him.

What if...what if one day he and Levi were under the influence of some miraculous love potion? Levi wouldn't even care about them being blood related; he would only have eyes for Eren. Maybe they wouldn't truthfully have one another's heart, but they would be together in a different way.

How was he even thinking about Levi right now? Right, it was all Reiner's fault. Him and his stupid advice…

Would Levi's hands be gentle on him? They were always gentle when they had been touching his hair. Eren lifted his hand to imitate the soothing act of endearment, closing his eyes in order to let his imagination take over his inner vision. He imagined Levi's fingertips running along his scalp, tenderly, lovingly. Maybe even more so than in reality. But this was Eren's dream.

He also imagined his brother caressing his cheeks. A fleeting touch, barely there, but enough to make him shiver, and he leant into the touch with a breathy whine.

The window was open, and the evening breeze was still cool as summer was yet to fully arrive. All the same he felt an uncomfortable warmth in and around him. He opened his eyes, his vision blurry and still filled with images of Levi. Eren let out a breathy laugh as he realised that he was, in fact, aroused. If only Levi knew, he'd be disgusted, and heaven above with him.

Sometimes though, there were needs much more powerful than an offended kingdom of heaven, and it was stirring between his legs. Eren squeezed his eyes shut, praying that Reiner's words would prove their worth, so that there would at least be some good use to what he was about to do. Slowly, his hand travelled south until it was gripping the hem of his nightshirt. He drew the fabric up beyond his thigh until his half-hard member was exposed.

Under normal circumstances he would have crawled into the safety of the blanket to feel less exposed, but the heat was too unbearable. It had been a while, too. His fingers closed around his shaft, and he really was trying to keep his mind blank, to just enjoy the sensations until it was over. Levi still managed to sneak into his head, scrutinising him like the mentor he was. Rather than embarrassed by the mental image of being watched by none other than his own brother, he was filled with a sudden rush of excitement (a twitch of his erection).

He stroked himself gently. It was him loving himself at first, and somewhere along the line it became a fantasy of _being_ loved. Loved by the gentle hand of a brother sending small but overwhelming waves of pleasure from the tips of his curling toes to his ears.

Eren continued to pump his cock in slow strokes. And whenever he would open his eyes, he was greeted by Levi; and then it was no longer him but his brother touching him, kissing the heated skin from the base of his neck to the parted lips. The kiss felt so real and so right that he was afraid he would pine for the fantasy to become reality come morning. Quickly, he was nearing his peak. He didn't have time to feel embarrassed about it ending so soon, too lost in the moment of heat as his hand was pumping faster.

He made no sound, but his breathing was heavy. Eren's body writhed and twisted until the bedsheet became a wrinkly mess. Pleasure built up rapidly, along with the breaking of sweat, and he was in no control of his hand's rapid movements. One more stroke made him come undone. His back arched off of the bed, mouth wide open in a silent scream.

"Hngh...oh god...Lev—" Eren covered his eyes with the back of his hand whilst riding out his orgasm. The other trembling hand continued to pump sticky come that trickled down his length and onto his fingers.

He stared at the ceiling, breath coming out in harsh puffs.

* * *

 

Sunday after church was always time for a leisurely luncheon at the palace's conservatory. Eren could hardly refuse without a solid reason, and it wasn't like he didn't enjoy the amazing surrounding.

The conservatory above the northwest wing of the _Festsaalbau_ was built according to the king's instructions. It was a thirty feet tall cask made of glass filled with exotic flora and fauna, complete with an artificial lake, a Moorish kiosk, a fishing lodge, and large replaceable panorama paintings. Truly, it was almost like a different world.

It was the second week of Eren's stay in Munich. The previous three days were made of a perfect cycle of practising, dinner with the king, and going home to become reacquainted with his right hand. In the end masturbation at poor fantasy-Levi's expense had done nothing to improve his performance— only lots of practice, and in-depth character interpretation were of significant help. That didn't stop him from grabbing his penis every single night, though. But he tried not to think about it while he was in the company of King Ludwig.

He quickly took a sip of black tea, seeking refuge behind the small cup to hide his embarrassment.

"I still can't stop marvelling at this conservatory, Ludwig. Each time it feels like entering a different world." Once again he let his eyes roam across the large artificial oasis.

"But that's exactly what this place is. A different world," replied Ludwig in a dreamy sigh. "I am so tired of this bleak city."

Eren idly wondered whether the unification of the german empire was somehow related to the creation of the conservatory.

"Why are you so adamant about entering a different world? Aren't you king of your own kingdom?"

Ludwig made a face. "My kingdom is not even mine to rule. It's the German emperor's now…" He sighed. "Say, Eren...tell me about a different world. A made up world if you wish."

Eren frowned, but decided to humour the man, and thought about a made up world. "Well, there is this dream I—"

His train of thought was disrupted by a muffled clamour coming from the other side of the conservatory's entrance. The voices grew in volume, but none of them were able to make out the words. Eren could see the doorknob rattling, and Richard Hornig's voice behind the door was frantic. He appeared to be distressed.

Finally, the door leading into the private luncheon space crashed open.

"You can't! The king won't receive any guests now!" The king's personal attendant stumbled behind the intruder.

But Eren couldn't care less about the poor man's plight.

With the hemline of his fitted black frock coat fluttering, and decorative walking stick casually propped on one shoulder, Levi barged into the conservatory. Ignoring Richard Hornig's protests, he proceeded to stride towards the set round table where the king and his brother were seated. Grey eyes flickered towards a gaping Eren before he then settled to just gaze at their general direction.

"Good day, gentlemen. I hope you don't mind me joining you," he said in a halfhearted attempt at pleasantry.

When Eren was still staring at him with mouth wide open, his halfway chewed salad threatening to drop out, Levi finally turned to regard him in disapproval. "Stop staring and close your mouth, Eren, that's impolite and disgusting." Not that he was in a position to teach about politeness.

Eren, as he finally regained his senses, finally closed his mouth and swallowed without bothering to chew. "Levi! Why are you here?" His voice was croaky, so he cleared his throat afterwards.

"I told you not to stare." Eren's wide eyes trying to pin him in place with their sheer intensity were starting to make him feel uncomfortable.

"Performing night isn't until a week from now." The younger brother abandoned his seat in favour of gaping at Levi from a higher level. "What about work?"

"Tsk," Levi jerked his head in annoyance. "I finished everything."

" _Everything_?" The high-pitched shriek sounded like Eren's voice had never broken. He was pretty sure Levi was drowning in his own workload ever since they had returned from their spontaneous vacation. It was impossible for him to have finished all of it. Then again...Eren did a double take and noticed the even more pronounced dark circles under Levi's eyes. He had always looked somewhat sleep deprived, but this was taking it to a whole new level.

Had Levi sacrificed his sleeping hours just so he could travel to Munich earlier than intended? Eren's heart skipped in excitement.

"What a pleasant surprise," the king spoke after he had overcome his initial loss of words. "Come, join us eat."

Richard Hornig took the hint and disappeared for a short time, then returned with an additional chair for the Fürst. He placed it between the other two men, but Levi snatched it away from his grasp, and hauled it very much closer to Eren's chair. He sat down unceremoniously, ignoring the odd looks directed at him.

"I hope I didn't interrupt any meaningful discussion," said Levi without actually meaning it.

"Actually you did." Ludwig smiled and turned his attention back towards Eren, who appeared to be startled for a moment.

"Uh...oh, about the stories of different worlds, right?"

Ludwig nodded to encourage him. Eren would rather talk to his brother, but the expectant look he received left him with no other choice.

"Well, as I said, I sometimes have a recurring dream. Especially when I've had a snack before bed." Eren scratched the back of his head sheepishly. "I dream I live in a small town encased by walls that are as tall as a cathedral. You see, the town is part of a kingdom, the only kingdom left in the whole world. And the king lives inside the innermost walls."

Ludwig's eyes lit up in excitement. Levi was also attentively listening to his story.

"But they live there perched together even though there is a bigger world outside the walls. And the reason they can't break free is...there are really big people outside the walls. Big like a house, and they eat humans."

The king was no longer eating, just absorbing everything about the kingdom inside high walls. "That's so fascinating."

"That's a nightmare," scoffed Levi. Eren was inclined to agree.

"I want that." Ludwig's imagination soared. He looked so much younger, almost like a boy, in his daydream. "A kingdom far away from everything. My walls, and only selected people may enter. You two are allowed to live inside, of course."

Eren frowned. "Why would you want to live in a cage? I wouldn't want a golden throne inside that cage even if readily offered to me."

"It's not a cage. It's your own world."

The more he listened to the king's gushing about his ideal world, the angrier he felt himself become. To think that the same man was the head of a state made him want to bite into his own flesh.

Levi noticed Eren's temper rising. And before the boy could explode (he thought about the Prussian officer incident), Levi tapped the other's shin with his foot. It seemed to have worked, because Eren deflated visibly like a balloon.

Eren was now fumbling with the cutlery, poking on a slice of tomato, face still red, but at least he was no longer trying to yell at the king. He raised his fork to take a bite, only to lower it again. Anger was replaced by bewilderment. "Why are you so...fixated on worlds that are not yours? Why don't you accept the world you were born into the way it is? You're so...out of reach."

In the end Eren also felt sad. Because Ludwig was beautiful, and capable of casting a spell over others, including him. But the king was trapped in his own spell.

Meanwhile, Levi was tempted to ruffle Eren's hair. The dejected face was almost unbearable to witness. It was a good decision to arrive early.

Ludwig's eyes softened at the boy's question. "I want to remain an eternal mystery. To myself and others."

Eren looked up. And despite everything, he couldn't help but smile a little. "I'm sure you will."

* * *

 

By the time Eren reached his lodging, it was already late and dark. Levi was with him, now critically eyeing the place. He fretted the moment his brother's eyes lingered on the small pile of carelessly strewn pieces of clothing. Rightfully so, because Levi immediately shot him a scolding glare.

"I had no time to do it properly," he explained. And it sounded weak.

"This place looks like a waste dump."

Well, now he was sure Levi was exaggerating. "It's not that bad. I do clean. Not even I can stand living in between a mess. Are you staying over?"

Levi froze, and did not turn to regard Eren. "No, I'm staying at the palace. Didn't have the chance to claim a room at a hotel."

Eren trudged to the smaller man's side. "But you hate the Munich palace."

"I know that, thanks." Levi rolled his eyes.

"You should stay over."

He looked up to search for any hints of a joke, yet he could not find any. "Your bed's a single."

"It's a bit bigger than normal. I think we can both fit in it. Stay. And tomorrow you can stay at a hotel." Eren poked Levi's bicep which was supposed to be persuasive. "Besides, I missed you."

Cursing inwardly, Levi bit his lips. Those words were not supposed to be uttered beyond the boundaries of ink and paper. For they were even more powerful in sound, and he was a weak old man.

He did not know how it could have come to this situation. But he was now lying down on the small space next to Eren. In bed, wearing the other's spare nightshirt, which was a snug fit. The situation was not helping Levi's inner turmoil of conscience versus repulsive attraction, and he doubted he could survive the night.

But Eren was animately rambling about the people at the opera, and sometimes it wasn't quite clear whether they were hated or loved. Nevertheless, Levi was relieved to find out that his brother had been more than capable of taking care of himself. And the talking was lighthearted enough to relax his mind. Eren was still talking about a certain girl named Annie, and Levi was glad to listen while he was idly skimming the Tristan and Isolde novel.

"Eren, some pages are sort of sticky...you haven't been eating and drinking in bed while studying your play, have you?" He shot the other a suspecting look.

For some reason Eren was panicking. He was blushing all of the sudden, and spluttered as he scrambled to snatch the book away. "No of course not!"

Levi did not believe him, though he decided not to press any further. "By the way…" He rolled over on his stomach. "You almost lost your cool earlier. You've got to be more careful with your words when you're around important people. Even I had to learn that."

Eren groaned and buried his face in his palms. "I know. It's just…" He let go of his face and stared up. "It's just…"

"You've grown weary of dreamers."

The younger brother smiled sheepishly. "You read my letter."

"That letter was the reason I came early. You wrote something like that, of course I would be worried. You're fifteen. You're supposed to have dreams. Don't drop them simply because a certain someone is forever lost in his irreality."

Eren turned to his side, head propped up with one arm. "You're right. Then again, I'm also worried that people of his position could even think like that. If someone of power decided to erect walls around us…" He shivered at the thought. "I wouldn't want that."

Levi flicked Eren's nose, earning himself a small yelp. "Don't worry. There will never be a wall in Germany."

Rubbing his nose, Eren sniffed. "Yeah, true. I guess Ludwig is, after all, a fairytale king,"

Levi made a sound of agreement. "That he is. He'd always been more interested in things of fantastical nature, but I remember him actually being dutiful. He must have lost his drive after the unification of the German empire. I heard he didn't attend the emperor's coronation. Ludwig is, Ludwig is a true king."

"A true king?"

"The last true king. He would have been happier if only he had been born a century earlier. Back then kings were still kings. It was a position appointed by god, and kings wore ermine coats, they were surrounded by song and all that glitters. And now at the close of this century, the dreams of kings are dying, and the visions of iron chancellors become the new reality." Levi settled his head on the surprisingly soft pillow, and closed his eyes.

Though his eyes snapped open as soft fingertips touched his cheek. He watched the hand caressing him, then Eren's eyes.

"And what are you, Levi?"

"What do you mean?" He whispered.

"Are you a fairytale king or an iron chancellor?" Eren smiled.

The Fürst snorted. "I'm neither king nor chancellor. Go to sleep Eren. It's late."

As if to prove him right, Eren yawned. He finally tucked himself underneath the soft cover, but his hand was still resting on his brother's face, and said brother did not bother to remove it.

Levi indulged himself in a few seconds of admiring Eren's sleeping face. So peaceful and young. Way too young, and more importantly, way too related by blood. And yet here he was scooting himself closer to wrap an arm over Eren's body.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you liked this chapter! Wahh, I'm so excited for some reason. 
> 
> Footnotes yo:  
> \- Richard Hornig: The equerry of Ludwig II. Rumour has it he was Ludwig's lover.  
> \- Eren's stage name Milkah is according to biblical apocrypha the name of (biblical) Levi's wife. Gosh Eren is such a fanboy.  
> \- A reminder, iron chancellor is a reference to Otto von Bismarck (that guy responsible for the German unification)  
> \- [Photography of Ludwig's conservatory](http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/e/ea/Wintergarten_Residenz.jpg)
> 
> Thanks for reading!


	8. Liebestod

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Liebestod = Love-death

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You thought I had abandoned this story. Well, you were wrong.
> 
> SOB I'm so sorry, I have no words. Despite the long wait, I'd like to thank everybody for the amazing response the previous chapter got. All of you who read, commented, left kudos: THANK YOU!
> 
> Now on to the next chapter. I should consider giving this story a subtitle. An Eternal Mystery - or Eren's adventures of sexual tension with various people while Levi's sitting at home like a neglected husband.

The boy rarely graced others with a smile or bestowed upon them the privilege of witnessing his bubbling laughter. It was not like he had no zest for life, quite the contrary, as he was boisterous at his best and snobbish at his worst. The former everybody found amusing— but nobody could tolerate the latter without an eye roll. Even though they could comfortably call him their friend, his smile never came easy.

So maybe the abundance of smiles and laughters was reserved for someone special.

But that Monday was different. Most of them just about managed to drag themselves to rehearsals with their minds partially stuck in the sweet memory of the weekend. Even the overly enthusiastic boy of nobility would usually appear with a hint of laziness. How curious it was to have him emerge from the curtains onto the stage, not only with a small leap but also a smile so bright, they were briefly convinced it must have had been a twin brother. One who had no walking stick shoved deep inside his aristocratic posterior.

Rehearsals were smooth. As in, Eren was not complaining about Bertholdt's sweaty hands. He also refrained from throwing a hissy fit whenever Reiner's broad figure would cast too much shadow on him. Even Annie's little taunts could not sway him.

"Alright. What happened?"

Eren looked up from combing the ends of his wig. The practice session had just ended and he was ready to leave. Looking up, he discovered he was surrounded by the other singers (there was even someone he recognised as the second violin). The teeth of his wooden comb fought the tangles; something that required him to use more force. So he pulled harder. Anything to escape their intrusive eyes.

Sasha plopped down on the fake rock next to Eren whose eyes were still relentlessly glued to the tangled wig. The tugs were horrible to witness acts of violence that only served to pull out bushes of synthetic hair. Unwilling to watch the brutish clumsiness, Sasha snatched Eren's comb away, taking the chocolate strands in one hand to do the brushing instead.

"So, why's the young lord so happy today?" She blinked up from her task, batting her eyelashes to squeeze an answer out of Eren.

He drew his eyebrows down in a scowl, unwilling to share. He felt a broad hand shaking him at one shoulder, and he did not have to look back to know that it belonged to Reiner.

"Spill it," he said.

"What's there to spill?" Eren rolled his eyes.

"You're awfully tolerable today," chirped Sasha.

Eren pursed his lips. "Oh, so I'm insufferable every other time?"

"Kind of," mumbled Bertholdt from behind Reiner. He was by far the tallest of the group but Eren had failed to notice him stand there until now.

Albeit being cornered by a circle of wide eyed naggers, his eyebrows twitching in irritation, he couldn't help the little smile that treacherously curled at the corners of his lips. Eren crossed his legs as nonchalantly as he could muster, then continued to smooth out the creases on his dress, and straightened himself haughtily.

"Well, the truth is," he let his gaze wander for added effect, "My brother has come to visit me in a haste because he could not stand spending the days without me any longer."

Sasha cackled in amusement. "You love your brother more than a lover. I feel sorry for the lady you would eventually marry."

Eren pushed her off.

* * *

 

Levi was bored out of his mind.

Apart from his general distaste towards Munich there was absolutely nothing he loathed more than having to attend tedious parties and diplomatic dinners of the city's bigwigs, the noble Lords and Ladies of old standing houses. There were the Wittelsbach, the Holnsteins, the Frankings, the Gravenreuths, the lords of Thannhausen, the whatshisface. All of them dutifully keeping the appearance of being royally delighted by his presence as they had assumed he had decided to retreat from society in favour of his 'small town' of residence. The only other one who hated it even more was Ludwig even though he was expertly hiding it behind his courteous smiles.

He would not have left his hotel room if not for the king's personal attendant Richard Hornig begging him to please come along in hopes of motivating His Majesty to participate in actual social gatherings that actually mattered. Levi had made it clear that his objective of coming to Munich was Eren and him alone. It was a poor excuse, they both knew, given that Eren had devoted all of his time to rehearsals.

Levi ate most of his meals alone.

* * *

 

"Why are we having additional rehearsals, just the two of us, again?" Eren was too exhausted from a long day spent with singing and acting but the blonde girl in front of him seemed unfazed.

They had finally moved on from sitting rehearsal to the next phase of orchestra staging rehearsal, and he was simply not used to the intense schedule as he could already feel his body and throat protesting. Besides, he felt bad about leaving Levi to fend for himself even though he had gone through all the trouble to come to Munich earlier than anticipated. Yet here he was because Annie insisted.

"I'm not happy with your performance at the end of Act 3. The conclusion." She ignored Eren's glare and tucked the capricious strands of her thin hair behind her ear, looking at nothing in particular.

Rolling his eyes, Eren crossed his arms defiantly. "Then again you never are. Happy with anything, that is."

Once again his jab fell on deaf ears. Instead he was grabbed by the arm and taken to the centre of the stage. He stood there bewildered.

"The last scene is of Isolde standing in front of the dead Tristan. She stares ahead with a distant not-in-this-world look, singing about her vision of his lover somehow risen from the dead, softly and gently smiling down at her." Annie circled him first, then stopped right behind him. She straightened Eren's posture, cupped his jaw and lifted his head so he was slightly looking up.

"Isn't this exactly how I do it?"

"Your problem is not the beginning. You're doing a good job actually; I like how dark and heavy your voice is, and it works well for Isolde. But the way you sing it...as if she's dying."

Eren frowned, decidedly uncomfortable with how close Annie was, especially since their relationship had been far from civil. "But isn't she?"

"Is that what you think?" She asked with a challenging tone.

"Yes?"

"Why?"

"Because," Eren carefully sought for the right words, "That's the conclusion of this tragedy. A double suicide...like Romeo and Juliet for example."

"Are you sure she died the Liebestod– the love-death? Think again; does the music sound like an erotic death?" Annie's questions forced Eren to frantically question his interpretation of the aria.

He stuttered out the exact stage directions as written in the libretto for a lack of a better idea. " _Isolde, as if transfigured, sinks in Brangäne's arms gently onto Tristan's corpse. Deep emotion and state of rapture among the onlookers._ "

Annie nodded. "Herr Wagner named the prelude of the first act Liebestod, but for the final piece, he chose 'Isolde's transfiguration'. It doesn't rule out the possibility of her death but by God don't sing it it like a dying heroine, don't sink onto Tristan's corpse as lifelessly as you did. Sing it like a cosmic happening."

Eren held his breath. The girl playing the part of Brangäne, Isolde's maid, lowered her hand from his jaw, now resting above the dip of his collarbone.

"Sing it like a reunion with your lover. A real one. Because once your body dies, there will be no reunion."

It was abstract but somehow he understood.

Annie's other arm encircled his waist, and he felt himself sinking down, slowly, but not lifelessly. A faraway gaze on his face.

Annie sank with him, singing the last of his part before the curtains would fall. She held onto him tightly as his knees touched the wooden ground without making a sound. Isolde drowned _in the wafting Universe of the World-Breath._

" _To drown,_

 _to founder_ –"

Eren joined in with his own voice, eyes glazed before rolling back as he closed them in a blissful state.

" _unconscious –_

 _utmost rapture!_ "

He was on his knees before the imaginary body of Tristan but did not let himself fall on top of him.

The hall was dead silent.

Somehow, Eren felt breathless as he was still enclosed in his role as Isolde. It did not exactly feel like life but it wasn't death either.

He felt fulfilled. Somewhat...like an afterglow.

Their shared silence was interrupted by clapping. His eyes snapped open and he took in a deep breath before turning his body. Annie was no longer holding onto him. And the one clapping was surprisingly Bertholdt, their Tristan. He appeared as shy as ever yet at the same time spellbound.

"I think that's a good conclusion. Really good." He stepped closer to them.

Annie stood and Bertholdt stopped in front of her. "But if it isn't exactly death, then what's the actual conclusion?"

She looked up at the tall boy. "It's–"

"A mystery," said Eren.

Annie stared at him in surprise, then smiled. She actually smiled at him, and he felt somehow embarrassed.

* * *

 

Eren could tell it was already dark outside. Most had already finished changing out of their costumes and were ready to leave for the day, but were still mingling for small chit-chats. Instead of running back to the hotel where Levi, and now him, stayed, he decided to find Annie.

She was in the middle of hanging up her costume, regarded him impassively, and did not bother to ask him of his business.

"Why have you been so mean to me all this time?"

"Isn't it obvious?" She finally faced him head-on.

"You...want my role, right?" Eren scratched the back of his head.

"Wrong. I _deserve_ your role." For the first time she did not sound as monotone as usual. "I'm not trying to deny the quality of your voice. It's not even your lack of experience. It's the fact that in the event of the female lead's absence, it is my place to replace her."

The boy was speechless facing the spew of words coming out of her usually reserved mouth. Her blue eyes reflected the flickering light.

"And then you came. Some noble boy with no stage history whatsoever, and took what is mine. You think it's not a big deal but I worked so hard to finally get here...just to have it taken away by a boy dressed up as a girl with the cheap excuse of wanting to feel the role, while in truth he probably has to hide his true identity, because in the eyes of your old noble family this job is a whore's job."

She grabbed a good chunk of his fake long hair, and Eren's heart filled with dread. He felt the wig slip. She would yank it off, he thought.

Before it could slide off, however, she let go. They stared at one another.

"Now you know."

He gulped and nodded. "I'm...sorry."

She shook her head, and those lightweight wisps of hair that she had so carefully tucked behind her ear fell back on her face. "Consider an outstanding night of performance your apology to me."

Instantly, his face lit up. He grinned at her with an enthusiastic nod. "I promise."

She brushed against him as she made her way for the exit, and that was when he realised that he too should make haste to get out of the opera house. Quickly, he slipped behind a modesty screen to change. Grabbing his belongings, he jogged towards the door.

On his way out he overheard a girl named Mina chattering with Sasha. She appeared to be excited about something.

"I'm not pulling your leg. I heard the director talk about how the Fürst von Thurn und Taxis is going to come to our performance next week."

His brother's title was enough to make him slow down. Curiously, he peered over at them.

"You never see him in Munich anymore these days. He used to accompany His Majesty all the time, so I wonder what's the occasion?" Sasha giggled.

"Looking for a bride?" They laughed.

"What, for you, Mina?" She playfully pushed the other away.

"Who knows? He is Bavaria's most sought-after bachelor after all."

Eren was not aware that he had moved closer to them. The girls looked up at him questioningly.

He scoffed at the girl with black pigtails. "Obviously, you can't be his bride. Only highborn people can, and last time I checked you weren't one."

Mina and Sasha stared at him with wide eyes; words simply failed them. And the lack of verbal response brought Eren back, realisation sinking in like venom. He covered his mouth with one hand as if it could stop him from saying any more. A stuttered apology, and he turned on his heel to escape.

* * *

 

"Levi." Eren closed the door with the gold-plated number 705 behind him, and scanned the richly furnished living room of the hotel suite for his brother.

His eyes lingered on the largely empty dining table. During this time Levi would usually occupy that space for an evening meal yet he was nowhere to be seen. Leaving his bag on the coffee table, he winded through the set of settees and single pedestals, making a beeline for the first attached bedroom. He took a deep breath to calm himself down before knocking, calling out his brother's name once again.

The rushed oncoming footsteps mimicked his agitated heartbeat. Eren could not forget what had happened at the opera house, and he was filled with such an overwhelming unrest, he didn't know what to do.

The door finally opened, and he would have loved nothing better than to cling to Levi. Simply the sight of his brother loosening the black tie from his meticulous collared shirt was enough to make him feel hot all over.

"Thank God you made it just in time. They wanted to coerce me to yet another stuffy formal dinner." Levi sighed in relief, and ran long fingers through his combed back hair to muss it up to its usual state. "I was counting on you to return on time, so I could say that I had company but you took so long."

Eren's eyes were wide and terrified. "Are you looking for a bride?"

Levi blinked, stunned into silence.

"Well, are you?"

Eren knew that even though Mina and Sasha's social standing was far away from being close to Levi's, they still had a bigger chance than him– a boy and above all a sibling. And the very thought of it wrecked his heart.

Stepping out of his room, the elder brother ruffled the chocolate mop and led the other back to the living room. Now under the warm light of the crystal chandelier he could spot the flush of red on Eren's cheeks. Levi's throat felt dry.

"I'm not." He did not like how his tone came out sounding like a reassurance; the implication of it was just too unthinkable.

Eren relaxed visibly but not completely. "Aren't you getting old? You're what, thirty-six?"

"Thirty-four, and I'll just pretend I did not hear that. I don't want to hear any more of this, understood?" Levi gritted out.

Letting out a short breathless laugh, Eren nodded in approval. "Don't worry, I don't think you look old at all. Or more like…"

Levi almost flinched away from Eren's hand mapping out his temple, cheekbones, and jaw. It was a gentle touch, so much that his head might have felt a bit dizzy. Throughout all of it he could not avert his eyes from Eren's all-revealing gaze.

"More like?" He managed to rasp.

Pursing his lips, the corners slightly upturned in the faintest hint of a smile, Eren hummed. "I really like your mature features." He chuckled lightly, seemingly embarrassed now. "Makes you look dependable."

Levi really did not think he could survive the boy.

"Well, a kid would think that of an adult." He cleared his throat. "Anyways, get out of that cheap dress. I want to eat at the restaurant downstairs."

* * *

 

Exactly six years ago in a similar summer afternoon Tristan and Isolde had its world première.

Its journey to the world stage spanned over years. Richard Wagner, still resentful of Paris Opéra's horrendous rendition of his _Tannhäuser_ , offered Tristan and Isolde to Karlsruhe. Eventually, Vienna was chosen to première the opera. However, after over seventy rehearsals in two years, it was deemed impossible to stage.

It was King Ludwig II who brought the _unperformable_ Tristan and Isolde to Munich. And now here Eren was, about to stand on the very stage on which the opera that was considered impossible to perform had first spread its magic.

Though nervous, he wanted to make it unforgettable for the audience, for the performers, for the king, for Levi, and for himself. He had sworn to do this eternal Isolde justice.

A collective gasp and sudden commotion made him turn his head, finding the king and his brother at the doorstep of their dressing room. Ludwig greeted the performers with a friendly smile, expressing his eagerness to witness tonight's entertainment, while Levi remained motionless with the occasional glance towards Eren.

Having overcome his initial astonishment, he stepped forward to greet the king with an awkward curtsey.

"Your Majesty." He then shifted to face Levi; not giving any indication of knowing him in person. "Your Highness."

Eren supposed it must have been an odd experience for his brother to see him clad in a white medieval dress with gold trimmings, the top of his head adorned with a golden circlet. He fought down the blush that threatened to tint his cheeks as the thought of looking like a bride crossed his mind.

"Are you ready for the performance?" The king inquired.

Snapping out of his little daydream, Eren regarded Ludwig with a nervous and unsure expression. It was intimidating for sure, given that a lot was on the line depending on how well he was going to perform. But precisely for that reason Eren vowed to step onto the stage with nothing less than his very best.

"It's your beloved Tristan and Isolde after all. It will be worth it." He said with more confidence.

Pleased with Eren's response, Ludwig smiled and stepped closer, ignoring the other's confused blinking, and how he had moved back instinctively. A small gasp escaped the boy's lips when he was presented with a posy of cornflowers.

"If it pleases me, this will be yours." The blue petals, somehow still dewy, tempted him sweetly like a reward flaunted in front of him prior to a race. Eren wanted the flowers. Not because he was especially keen on receiving flowers, moreover he craved the recognition that came with them.

Levi who had kept quiet all along let out a mocking tut. He leaned closer to scrutinise the cornflowers in distaste. "You of all people are going to give him that _Prussian Blue_? Are you trying to mock him?"

He was instead punished with the king's reprimanding frown which then dissolved into a patronising smile. "You wouldn't know about the more beautiful meaning of a blue flower, would you, Levi?"

"I'm afraid I'm not proficient in such trivial things," Levi answered coolly.

Unfazed by the underhanded insult, in fact, looking more amused than disgruntled, Ludwig shook his head. "A blue flower is love, and above all...an intense yearning."

Something in those words uttered with such nonchalance caused Levi's breath to hitch, and his gaze flickered towards Eren in a fraction of a second.

"And that feeling...you understand it well, don't you, Levi?"

Levi glared up at the king, though short on a proper comeback. "I think we should head to our box now. We're impeding the actors."

"Well then," Ludwig agreed, "I wish you all well, Ladies and Gentlemen."

* * *

 

The rounded auditorium glistened in its full splendour of red and gold, filled to the brim with members of the high society wearing feathers and crowns, diamonds and pearls, fans and theatre binoculars. All of them were accommodated in the large hall that was able to hold over two-thousand spectators across the ground floor and on the five levels of balconies.

The centre of the auditorium was the elevated royal loge, a viewing box specifically reserved for the royal audience and its guests only. Instead of pillars, it was carried and guarded by two large sculptures of veiled muses.

Before the opera was set to begin, the Bavarian king stepped through the grand doors into the royal box. All eyes were fixed on him and the Fürst to his side, an enthusiastic round of applause following the short moment of silence, as if he was the actual showing of the evening. Both men took their seats, prompting the auditorium to lapse into silence, marking the beginning of the opera.

Levi fixed his gaze on the stage where the curtain had not yet risen. In the silent hall filled with rising tension, the orchestra resounded with a barely there tune, only to surprise the audience with a non-transparent chord of fickle harmony during the second bar. It instantly pulled everyone into the mood of the musical play, giving them a taste of pining pain and tragedy.

Afterwards, the curtain rose, revealing a scenery of a ship sailing the sea. A sailor's tenor resounded. On the ship an Irish king's daughter to be led to King Marke of Cornwall as his bride.

Levi gripped the armrest of his seat the moment Eren appeared on stage. At the first glance, one was instantly aware that he was not portraying a happy bride to be. The play of his expressions showed humiliation, anger, betrayal, and grief. Isolde, after the loss of her fiancé, was to be brought to the King of Cornwall by his nephew Tristan.

Tristan, she knew, was the murderer of her first fiancé, and in spite of that knowledge she had healed him from the poison of her betrothed man's sword. Why? Because she had fallen in love with him the moment he had locked eyes with her.

Yet that love had quickly turned to burning, destructive hatred. Eren startled the audience with a booming voice singing not only lament but also vengeance. Isolde felt betrayed because the Tristan she had saved and loved was now taking her to be married off to some other man, and avoiding her existence.

Isolde requested a meeting with Tristan, reminding him that he owed her his life. His actions had humiliated and undermined her honour, so she craved retribution. He offered her his sword yet she insisted they drank atonement. Both of them were to drink out of a chalice with poison. Unbeknownst to them, Isolde's maid, unable to let her mistress die, had exchanged the poison with a love potion.

In an instant Eren's hateful eyes had turned wide, overcast by a cloud of adoration. Both Isolde and Tristan were now declaring their feelings of love and lust in a sudden frantic exchange.

" _Tristan!"_

" _Isolde!"_

They rushed into a passionate embrace. It was interrupted by the announcement of King Marke's arrival, marking the end of the first act.

When the curtain rose for the second time the setting had changed. Isolde and Tristan were shown standing in a garden during a secret rendezvous. It was, for a lack of a better expression, scandalous. Watching the couple sing and touch one another felt like witnessing something the audience shouldn't have taken part in. It felt wrong and dare they say erotic.

Levi bit his lip at the sight of Eren's expression, his voice caressing his ears like dripping honey and at the same time also like the devil's whisper. Never had he imagined that his brother was capable of such an adult mien, of acting out such a sensual topic. More than once he had almost averted his gaze because he had deemed it inappropriate to look at his flesh and blood being so...exposed. Even though, of course, everybody on stage was fully clothed.

From then on, he only had eyes for Eren. Everything and everybody else on stage forgotten. Levi barely registered the dramatic and violent scene in which the secret love affair was uncovered by Tristan's treacherous friend, resulting in a gripping duel. Tristan, overcome by guilt, purposely let himself be severely wounded. The second act ended with an air of unease; everybody was fretting over the couple's fate.

The last act showed the wounded Tristan wasting away in his castle, asking for any sightings of a ship with his beloved Isolde on it. Each time he asked, he was only disappointed by the sad tune of a shepherd's pipe. Tristan lamented his fate. And when finally, Isolde's ship arrived it was already too late. Her love died with her name on his lips. King Marke entered only to witness the tragedy of his nephew dying, even though he had come to unite the lovers.

Isolde's maid Brangäne rushed to her mistress's side, though she did not acknowledge her. She stood before Tristan's body, both arms slightly open, and eyes lost in the distance. The final aria was not a song of lamentation, surprisingly. Isolde appeared transfigured, clad in an otherworldly light, a faint smile on her lips.

It was a chilling performance. _Softly and gently how he smiles,_ she sang.

Levi shot a look to his side, knowing that this was the decisive scene, the crowning moment of the entire opera. And as he expected, Ludwig was completely hypnotised by Eren's performance. The king was completely unmoving, following every movement of Eren's lips, being visibly swept away by every word.

When Isolde sang that she was about to _sweetly in fragrances melt away,_ he too was melting away.

Eren, in the arms of Brangäne, sank to his knees in a state of worldly innocent.

_to drown,_

_to founder –_

Ludwig was in love with the legend of a time so far away from their own, in love with the song capable of carrying one's soul away, in love with the greatness that transcended anything as banal as worldly matters.

_unconscious –_

_utmost rapture!_

As for Levi... Levi was utterly, maddeningly in love with Eren.

The air in his lungs was taken away; his breath was cut off as painfully slow as the finale of the orchestra.

And the curtain fell.

* * *

 

It took Eren a moment to return from his high of singing the last aria. Annie's strong grip tightening made him snap back to reality. He was breathing heavily.

"It's over," she said, voice barely above a whisper.

"It's over."

For a moment he dreaded the silence on the other side. Had he done a bad job? Were they appalled by his performance? Eren's mind ran thousands of panicked thoughts, until a roar erupted from behind the heavy curtain.

The boy had no time to stomach the overwhelming applause and shouts as the remaining cast had gathered to stand in an orderly row on stage. Bertholdt on one side, and Annie to his other side. They held hands before stepping forward towards the once again rising curtain. Once again emerging, the whole cast bowed in front of the audience. The applause had turned deafening by now, and Eren could barely contain his wide grin.

For the fourth time the curtain was lowered. It was time for the performers to step forward on their own. First up was Bertholdt, looking a nervous wreck. He still managed to slip forward to receive his very own round of applause. Eren prepared for his.

After Bertholdt it was Eren's turn to squeeze himself from between the curtains. Stumbling forward, he shyly presented himself for the audience. And he thought he had got used to the booming applause and shouts of " _Brava!_ ", but oh he had been so wrong. Beaming his widest smile, he rested one hand above his heart and dropped a slow and deep curtsey in all directions. People threw flowers onto the stage, and he made sure to collect most of them with bubbling laughter.

They took a bow several more times afterwards. It seemed like forever. And when Eren thought that they had finally come to the end, he was pushed forward by his fellow singers.

"W-what? Hey!" He turned his head to give them a confused stare.

"Hop off the stage and greet the audience!"

Eren froze in place with an incredulous face. "I don't think that's common practice?"

Sasha flapped her hand with an eyeroll. "Eren. This is your one and only performance night. And tonight you're their idol. You should greet them and enjoy the thrill!"

Before he could question her any further, he was pushed off the stage. Reluctantly, and more than just a little bit unsure, he made his way through the first row. And sure enough, the people were eager to shake his hand, to praise him in person. It was an overwhelming yet rewarding experience. Sidling back and forth the different rows was extremely difficult but everybody welcomed the prima donna of the night. Many more flowers rained from the balconies.

Getting close to the last rows of seats, and in the middle of a small conversation with some baron, his speech was cut short. A blur of blue had crossed his vision. Looking down, he discovered that a posy of cornflowers had landed on top of said baron's lap. Eren's eyes widened in recognition.

His gaze followed the direction it had come from, and sure enough, he was standing right below the royal box. Taking the sign of acknowledgement in his hands as delicately as he could muster, he beamed happily.

"Excuse me, Your Lordship, but I'm afraid I must haste to pay His Majesty my respect." That said, he wasted no time to worm himself out of the auditorium.

Running up the staircase leading to the king's loge, he let the guards guide him to where the king and his brother were seated.

"Ah! The star of the evening!" Ludwig rose and clapped his hands with vigour. "You were splendid, Eren. I've never seen such an impressive Isolde. Everything's still so vivid in my mind."

Despite having heard a fair share of overflowing compliments all night, Eren could not help the deep shade of red colouring his cheeks.

"If you were to ask of me my kingdom tonight, I would give it to you readily."

The boy spluttered. "Y-you're too kind, Your Majesty!"

"Eren."

Levi's deep and calm voice stopped him from drowning in the excessive praise. And when he thought his heart could not beat and hammer any faster, the sight of his brother proved him wrong.

"Did...did you like it?" The answer was something he desperately wanted, and at the same time he was too afraid to hear it.

His brother closed his eyes and nodded. "I'm proud of you."

Eren thought that he never wanted the night to end.

"Thank you, Levi."

"Now, why don't you go back to your singer friends?" Levi shooed him away with one hand.

The younger brother rolled his eyes but turned to leave anyway. He figured they were about to discuss his adoption now. "See you later."

Once Eren was out of sight, Levi relaxed his stance by supporting his weight on his cane, and purposely avoided the king's gaze.

"Why didn't you tell him it was you who threw the flowers?" The Fürst could make out the teasing tone.

"Doesn't matter who did it. I know you loved the performance."

"That's true. And as tedious the whole thing is, I won't go back on my word. And as promised, I will help to speed up the adoption process." Even then Levi refused to regard the king, expression laced with agitation.

"About that...allow me to think about it some more," Levi said after a moment of hesitation.

At that the monarch's brows rose with interest. "May I ask why?"

"It's a big decision."

"Last month you were pressuring me, and now you want to postpone it?" Ludwig sat back down in contemplation, tapping his fingers on top of the armrest. The action faltered soon after. "I see it now."

Levi frowned at the odd words. "What do you mean?"

"You've changed your mind about one, no, two things." The king wore an unreadable expression, causing Levi to feel unease in the pit of his stomach.

"Oh?"

"Firstly." He lifted one finger. "You've changed your mind about your original purpose on calling Eren into your household."

Levi opened his mouth to retort but was cut short by Ludwig flicking a second finger. "Secondly, you somehow think that preventing an adoption would make him less of your own flesh and blood."

The grip around the handle of his cane tightened. "I'm not listening to any of your vile accusations."

"Am I wrong?"

Levi stormed out of the box without another word.

* * *

 

Eren was alone in the dressing room, and Levi was grateful for that. The long-sleeved gown he had worn on stage was draped over a simple wooden chair, leaving him only in the undergown, a white chemise dress with a train.

"The others are out celebrating and it got a bit too much for me." Eren chuckled and arranged the jewelry into a little box. "I thought your conversation with His Majesty would take you longer."

Levi closed the door behind him, and shook his head. "It was...surprisingly smooth. Of course, I will have to discuss the details sooner or later. But that's what letter correspondence is for."

That caught Eren's attention. "Why letters? We're already here."

He watched his elder brother pace about, winding himself through all the countless boxes filled with costumes and various stage props. Somehow he seemed to be all churned up inside; so Eren wondered if something had happened back there. "Are you all right, Levi?"

Levi halted his steps, straightening himself. "Yes."

The boy was not convinced. Levi, however, showed no signs of telling him any more, so he turned to organising the vanity again.

Whenever his brother was visibly upset and unwilling to talk to him about it, that's when Eren felt most insecure. He had learnt to play it down but the lingering apprehension always remained. So there was always that tiny bit of fear that somehow he was the cause of Levi's bad mood, and that it might be enough to make him want to send Eren away. He had been alright back then in Frankfurt, yet the many nights spent wishing he had a family were still vivid in his memories.

In short, he desperately wanted to be Levi's family.

All of his jumbled thoughts came to a standstill as arms brushed against his sides from behind. Familiar hands leant on the surface of the vanity, and he could feel the warmth radiating, filling the barely there distance separating both bodies.

Levi had wordlessly entrapped him from behind. He did not touch him but Eren could feel his hot breath against his neck. His hair stood on end at their tangible closeness, and he did not dare to lift his eyes up from fear of what he might find in the mirror's reflection.

"Eren."

His name on the man's lips, uttered with a timbre so dark, made him shudder. No longer was he able to withstand the temptation, and he finally raised his gaze to catch a glimpse of the reflection facing him.

All air was taken from him.

Levi's vivid eyes were trained on him through their reflection, and there was something different in the way he was looking at him. It was enough to make Eren's legs weak, and his heart throb like a diseased man.

"Let's go home," Levi breathed. "To Regensburg."

Eren barely managed to find his voice, and even then it came out chopped and raspy. "Already? We still have to take care of things with His Majesty, don't we?"

"I told you, that's what letters are for."

"But-"

"I'm sick of this place, and I want my little brother all to myself again." Levi's words were like a spell to which he was rendered powerless.

Eren turned around until they were face to face, him looking down, their bodies now even closer and yet not touching. "Let's go home, then."

* * *

 

Walking out of the dressing room they ran into Annie. She stared at them without saying a word, first at Eren, then at Levi.

The boy cursed inwardly. Being seen with Levi was more than just risky. He had stayed in disguise all throughout rehearsals because he had wanted to avoid them recognising him as the guy who once sang in an opera when he would eventually become a full member of the Thurn und Taxis.

He fretted Annie would be able to put the pieces together. To his surprise and great relief, she only stepped aside, slightly bowing at Levi.

"Your Highness," she mumbled.

The Fürst only heeded her with a curt nod before continuing his way along the narrow hallway. Eren followed him hastily.

"Eren."

He stopped dead in his tracks. Slowly, he turned to see Annie eyeing him with an amused glint in her blue eyes, arms crossed.

"I guess the next time you enter this building you'll be a princely guest."

Eren tilted his head. "And you the company's prima donna?"

She flashed him a brief smile. "Sure will be."

"It's a promise then, Annie."

"Indeed."

The boy nodded at her and followed his brother out, only answering his questioning look with a secretive smile.

"Who was that?" They stepped out of the opera house where they were promptly hit by the brisk evening air.

"A teacher, you could say." Eren pulled his thin coat tighter around him. "Let's go. Home."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry you had to suffer through the probably very boring opera description but finishing it off in just two paragraphs didn't feel right. Besides, during the whole performance Levi had several moments of big deal feelings. And because of that the Ereri is unstoppable. Yes, next chapter is where the thing happens.
> 
> Now, happy Footnotes!
> 
> -Visual inspiration for the last part in the dressing room with Levi was provided by [This Photo](http://imperialharem.com/post/107641952171/this-picture-of-romy-schneider-as-elizabeth)  
> \- [Isolde's Transfiguration](http://youtu.be/OAEkTK6aKUM?t=7m41s) If you're curious about the aria in question  
> \- The cornflower was regarded as Prussia's national flower of sort but a [Blue Flower](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Blue_flower) in itself was (especially in 19th century Germany) a popular symbol of love and longing.  
> \- The [Auditorium](http://www.muenchner-feuilleton.de/wp-content/uploads/MU24-25_M%C3%BCStaatsoper.jpeg) of the München Nationaltheater
> 
> As always, kudos and comments make me happy ^p^


	9. Consanguinity

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They were back home but not as brothers

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> All aboard the trash train choo choo!

The rhythmic chuffing sound of the steam locomotive filled the deadly silence of the evening landscape as the heavy carriages of the passenger train were pulled along. Thick smoke would rise from the chimney and engulfed everything in the immediate vicinity of the railway.

Eren's favourite part was the train whistle, a strident sound distinguishable even from a far distance. It would always make him sit straight on his well-cushioned seat, the signs of boredom vanishing from his eyes for a moment.

"Choo-choo!" He imitated the blaring sound.

And when it was over, he would return to kicking his feet in the narrow space of their first class cabin. Most of the journey was boring but it was nothing compared to the long hours in a horse carriage or the wooden seats of the third class cars. So he did not utter a single word of complaint in the comfortable and well-lit cabin he shared with Levi.

Besides, he still revelled in the high feeling of his success at the opera house. Sometimes he would close his eyes to rekindle the stage, the audience, the singing. The first class singing, he ought to remind himself, because he was truly fortunate to have been given a chance to perform with such a renowned opera company. He hoped that he would someday meet them again.

"All you've been doing tonight is make train sounds and sigh," said Levi with raised eyebrows.

Eren looked up from fiddling with the buttons of his waistcoat. "I don't have anything better to do. You refuse to be good company. Some gentleman you are, my lord."

"It's Your Serene Highness," the elder brother corrected with a haughty drawl. "And if you wish to be tortured by my poor skills in the fine art of conversation, so be it."

"This is why princesses avoid you. You bore them to death. Good thing you have a handsome brother to compensate for your unhandsome manners."

Levi snorted. "The two things aren't even related."

"Sure they are."

"Are not."

"Are too!"

They exchanged half-hearted glares before falling once again into comfortable silence, allowing the familiar noise of the steam powered B IX locomotive to replace the lack of words. It made Eren recall something he'd heard about at some point.

"Wasn't father involved in this railway business?" Eren traced the windowpane with the tip of his finger, at the same time watching Levi's vague reflection.

Levi folded the newspaper he had been reading and leant back to rest his head. "That's right. He was one of the founders of the Bavarian Eastern Railway Company. Back then when the Bavarian state refused to expand the railway any further."

"Only the South-North and West were connected, right?"

Levi nodded. "Large parts of east Bavaria were left out. The state did not have that kind of money left for a railway expansion, and since the operation was still largely unprofitable, they refused to take the risk. In order to improve business in the East, many factory owners, businessmen, and also father, invested in the founding of a railway company. They didn't want to rely on stagecoaches only, you see."

Eren hummed and tried to make out the tracks, and imagined all the work put into the construction that had made it possible for them to comfortably travel from Munich back to Regensburg. "From Nuremberg via Amberg to Regensburg, from Munich via Landshut to the Danube, from Regensburg via Straubing and Passau to the state border, from the Amberg-Regensburg line at Schwandorf to the state border at Furth near Pilsen...wow. That's insane."

"Eren...could it be that you're a bit of a railway enthusiast?" Levi clearly sounded amused by Eren's extensive knowledge.

"I admit, I used to lurk around the Frankfurt train station just to watch the trains move in and out. This is my first time boarding one, though." He glared at his brother. "Don't judge."

"I'm impressed, actually." There were no lies in his words, and if he were to be honest with himself he would have loved the sight of the boy staring at locomotives with childish bewilderment. He used to be like that too when he was young.

"Say, Eren…"

Eren hummed, acknowledging his brother.

"Don't you regret that you would never be on stage again?"

It was a strange question coming from Levi— a few weeks ago he had been so against it. Now confronted with that kind of question, Eren did not quite know how to react.

"I had lots of fun with everybody, and it was great to have your talent acknowledged. I still hear the applause." Eren stared at his dangling feet before looking up at Levi who appeared to be bothered by something. The younger took it as a sign of worry that he would prefer the opera rather than a life in Levi's household. "But I'm your little brother, and you as my only audience is more than enough! So, I won't be sad about leaving the stage behind for long. You're my family, hence my priority."

The sweet words filled Levi's heart with more and more affection for the younger, he wasn't aware he had this much room left for more. At the same time they pierced right through his conscience like daggers each time Eren would mention 'brother' or 'family'. They only served to remind him of how vile his feelings for the other were.

And yet…

A succession of rhythmic knocks startled him out of his spiralling thoughts. The door slid open; a uniformed man with neatly combed hair and a kind smile greeted them politely.

"I brought you refreshments, my lords." He placed a silver tray on top of the small table provided in their cabin before taking his leave with yet another friendly smile, tipping his hat as he retreated.

Levi eyed the tray with mild interest. There was a small basket with three kinds of bread, a plate with cheeses and smoked ham, a bowl with fruits, a decanter filled with red wine, and next to it two crystal glasses. He lifted the fruit bowl, and placed it in his lap.

"Fancy some fruit?"

Eren hummed. "I think I'd like some grapes."

Levi nodded, picked a cluster, and handed it over without looking up. When it was not immediately taken off of his hand, he turned his head with raised brows. And regretted doing so.

He was met with the sight of his brother staring at him expectantly, mouth slightly parted, asking to be fed.

For a moment he was frozen in place, knowing full well that he really ought to simply tell Eren to stop acting like a spoiled child, but also knowing that the look given to him was nowhere near childish. It was beckoning him. Levi, albeit terrified to follow, plucked a fruit absentmindedly, and raised it toward Eren's moist lips. They parted oh so slowly, grasped the round grape among their softness, and the tip of a pink tongue flicked forward, grazing Levi's fingertip, to roll the fruit into the boy's waiting mouth. All the while he held his gaze.

Spellbound, Levi continued to stare as Eren enjoyed the sweet and seedless treat, swallowing it noiselessly. He asked for more. Levi obliged without a word; by now he was too swept away by the moment to stop.

He fed him, one fruit after another. And each time he would feel Eren's lips or even tongue against him; too often and too deliberate to be waved off as mere accident. It was not the first time that he had noticed the voluptuous traits of Eren's lips, now glistening wet from the grape's juice; and it was not the first time that he had felt a pull towards them.

Keeping a distance, however, was no longer a matter of his consciousness kicking in. It had become a struggle.

Why was this child such a temptation?

A kind of impulsive anger overcame him, and he grabbed Eren's jaw, pulled him closer until he was halfway sprawled on the older brother's lap. To thoroughly regard the youthful face, he lifted Eren's head. He delighted in the way those green orbs looked upon him with an unmistakable want.

Driven by presumably the devil himself, he gently pressed another fruit against the younger brother's lips of sugar and spice. Eren's eyes were still trained on him, before he opened his mouth, not to let it be put in but to bury his teeth in the forbidden fruit straight from Levi's hand.

Time seemed to slow down the moment the tiny round thing burst in between his fingertips; clear juice seeped out and trickled down to his knuckles in little streams.

He was not granted any time to fetch a napkin to rid himself from the sticky wetness, for Eren' s tongue was on him, all smooth and hot, dragging itself from his palm to the back of his hand. At times Eren was downright lapping up the liquid from even the small spaces in between each finger.

Levi's body was on fire. His mind was reduced to the lewd, utterly inappropriate spectacle in front of him. There was no sound, just the image of Eren licking his hand with a countenance of pure delight.

Already past the point of caring, and being thoroughly encouraged by Levi's reaction, Eren stuck two trembling fingers in his mouth, and began to swirl his tongue around, and sucked.

Levi was losing his mind, and he wanted this enticer in his grasps- his soul's downfall did not seem to be too much of a price to pay.

Eren released him with an audible pop, and licked his lips. "Tastes sweet. A good harvest."

Finally, Levi got the chance to pick up a napkin to properly dry his now more wet than anything hand. He felt like he should address what had just happened but looking back up he simply found the other gazing out the window instead, feeding himself more grapes as he did so.

The topic was averted, though the tension still reigned in the cabin they occupied. And Levi knew it would follow them out of this train.

* * *

 

Eren discovered that St. Emmeram castle was his home.

The thought crossed his mind upon arriving at the castle's courtyard as he was encompassed by sights, scents, and sounds that he instinctively conceived as familiar, homely even. All the looming shapes and towers, months ago so threatening to the young stranger from Frankfurt, welcomed him back.

He could not wait to finally sleep in his own bed again.

* * *

 

The downside of finally being home was the fact that he had to resume private tutoring hours. It would have been bearable if not for the fact that Levi was trying his best to ignore the memory of Eren inappropriately licking him on board of the train from Munich. The younger had hoped he could get away with similar attempts, however Levi had steeled himself.

Eren would have stopped long ago. The thing is, he was yet to be rejected.

Levi evaded Eren's advances with great skill but the other did not fail to notice the missing words that would ultimately put a halt in his actions.

He was surprised by his own courage and persistence. Not too long ago he had sworn an oath to himself to lock the sinful feelings in a chest deep in his heart. He would treasure them, he had told himself, but they would never see the light of day. A living songbird caged in the darkest depths of his heart- and if God was merciful, it would slowly cease to sing and waste away.

But fate was cruel. Levi gave the bird hope, fed it, and kept it alive. And Eren was not a strong enough fortress to keep the songbird locked away. So he dared to think, what if the bird was meant to fly? Even though he, the fortress, would rot and decay as a direct consequence, passing his poison over to his brother until he too would lose his grace.

_There is no place for me in paradise, for I am wicked. And forgive me if I take you with me._

"You're distracted."

Eren smiled at his brother in apology, his gaze lingering on him rather wistfully, and then straightened himself and focused his eyes back on the book laid out in front of him. It was the Almanach de Gotha, a yearbook reporting on Europe's royalty and upper nobility, a diplomatically relevant reference book concerning anything notable about the living monarchies, reigning or former reigning. In case you had to send obligatory letters of congratulation or condolences and did not want to fail at doing so, because it was just too easy to lose track of so many aristocratic houses.

Eren was not spared from the nightmare.

"I'm sorry, Levi. You have to admit this is extremely boring."

Levi had insisted that he should know Europe's existing reigning and former reigning dynasties by heart. The Thurn und Taxis as a princely house did no longer reign over a principality ever since it had been mediatised into the kingdom of Bavaria in 1806 during the dissolvement of the Holy Roman Empire by Napoleon Bonaparte. But it remained equal to the still reigning houses such as the royal family of Bavaria, namely the house of Wittelsbach, by birth.

"What's the deal with being equal to reigning dynasties anyway? Prestige?" Eren scratched the back of his head in frustration as he furiously took notes. He really was bad at this, and preferred the regular lessons over this genealogical mess.

Levi flipped the pages of a very thick and very old looking book. Eren could already feel a headache coming up.

"Mostly for marital purposes. It was indispensable to both reigning and mediatised dynasties that they could still royal intermarry."

Eren hummed. "Which is why your grandmother was a duchess of Mecklenburg-Strelitz, the sister of Queen Luise of Prussia. So you...we are related to the royal family of Prussia." There were other examples he could think of without having to study the family tree. "Your mother was duchess in Bavaria. The dukes of Bavaria are a branch of the House of Wittelsbach, King Ludwig's family. And your mother's sister is Elisabeth. Your aunt is the Empress of Austria and Queen of Hungary?"

Soon enough, he felt his head spin. "Any other majestic relatives I should know of before I accidentally overlook a royal uncle's birthday, insulting him by not sending any birthday cards?"

His brother scoffed. "By now all European royalty is related anyway. It's not like we have an unlimited option of potential candidates in marriage. The bloodline must stay 'pure' and the power must be kept within at all cost. Of course there are the occasional cases of black sheep in the family but you get the gist."

It made sense, Eren thought. It also made him pick up on one interesting thing, especially after a time of scanning various family trees. "For that to happen, there has to be a good deal of inbreeding."

He chose to catch his brother's gaze as the words pregnant with implication were uttered. The result was instantaneous. Levi's body stiffened and his face turned just a little bit paler. It was not like Eren had uncovered a secret, because it really wasn't. However, he knew exactly what Eren was hinting at.

"It's inevitable," he managed to force out, growing more and more uncomfortable in his own skin. "Royal intermarriage is a business of power and inheritance."

Eren roamed the library for more references on royal genealogy. Sometimes he had to make use of one of the ladders just so he could get to the harder to reach sections.

"The Wittelsbach for example, they've engaged in first-cousin and uncle-niece marriages. The most recent case is again our aunt Empress Elisabeth, formerly duchess in Bavaria; she married into the House of Habsburg. But her and her husband's mothers were sisters!"

He continued with a lower voice. "Not to mention the similar unions in our bloodline."

Eventually, Levi had had enough. Slamming the heavy leather-bound book on the table, he shot his brother a hard glare, voice seething with warning. "Well, good thing siblings are off limits."

For a moment Eren was taken aback, as well as hurt and disappointed by the sharp rebuke. But his point still stood.

Carefully, he pushed the documents and books in his close proximity aside, placing his arms on the table. He let his wrist touch Levi's. Both eyed the blue lines underneath their skin. Even though Eren was more tan while Levi was pale, they both shared the same cool undertone.

Their eyes met for a fragile exchange. Eren softly smiled, and Levi could not quite tell if it was sad, yet there was no mirth either. The younger spoke the words that would follow the elder for the rest of his life.

"In one way or the other, it is accursed blood that flows in our veins."

Forty thousand words could not, in the voicelessness of Levi's feelings, explain the beauty of Eren. For even if they were bound to one another by the liquid madness of centuries, Eren possessed an all-embracing youthfulness that made Levi conclude, the boy was as much a curse as he was a blessing.

And the very essence of Eren, his body and soul, he craved to call his own and make immortal. But Levi could never reach out to follow his desire's command. Brothers were not meant to be lovers.

And so...

"Let an artist paint you."

Silence. Bemused by the odd change of subject, Eren retracted his hand and rose a curious eyebrow. "What brought this on?"

Levi only shrugged, rose from his seat, and massaged the stiffness in his neck. "A well-known French painter is visiting Germany, or so I heard."

Eren wondered who said painter was. Excitement rose in him, and already he was considering what to wear for a portrait. He had not expected a portrait painting until after the official adoption, so maybe Levi had a more familial commission in he probably shouldn't wear something too formal.

He was so caught up in the middle of agonising over his fashion options that he failed to hear Levi's instructions to self-study as he had to keep an appointment with some architect. Maybe he should wear the sailor suit again.

Levi rolled his eyes as he was being blatantly ignored, leaving the library with little mutters expressing annoyance.

* * *

 

Gustave Courbet was 53, an alleged revolutionist, and a hero in the world of fine arts the day he crossed the halls of St Emmeram castle.

The head of Thurn und Taxis had commissioned him for a portrait of his younger brother, and had granted him creative freedom. Either the family head was an avid supporter of free arts or he simply knew nothing about it. He was leaning towards the latter.

Though he had not come to mock the German nobleman; the French and the Germans had just fought a war after all. Good thing he was a generally welcome guest in Germany.

The castle's majordomo who had received him was leading him to what appeared to be one of the castle's many parlours. Bowing his head slightly towards the painter, the stoic man pushed the white door open, revealing a well-lit room not too large in size with tall windows, and surprisingly, barely any furnitures.

In the middle of the room stood a youngling taller than the man to his side, seemingly engaged in a hushed conversation. Their German was a blur, too fast for his French ears to understand. Though he knew that it was trivial chit chat, there was something hidden in the way they let their gaze rest upon the other, an unspoken truth. A taboo.

Courbet's first thought was that he wanted to paint that scene.

"Highness, your esteemed guest has arrived," spoke the majordomo.

Both turned to regard the painter who in return bowed in respect.

"Monsieur Courbet," greeted Levi, "Thank you for lending us your time."

"Monseigneur." Gustave Courbet took the hand offered to him, and shook it firmly. "It is my pleasure."

The Frenchman glanced past the Fürst's shoulder where the young man was eyeing him with plain-spoken curiosity. Noticing that, the master of the house stepped aside, and extended his arm.

"This is my younger brother."

"My sujet," the painter replied as he stroked his greying beard.

At last, the younger brother approached them and shook the man's hand in greeting. "We emptied the room for you, so you may make use of it as you would in your own atelier."

"How very thoughtful of you." He rarely had the pleasure of encountering patrons who understood his needs. "I would like to make first sketches of the young master today before returning tomorrow for the actual painting."

The Fürst did not appear to be very talkative, only nodding to the artist's explanation. And after Courbet had unpacked his drawing utensils, he cleared his throat. "Well, I'll leave you two then. Don't want to be a hindrance."

For the following hour Eren sat and at times stood to be sketched as a means of familiarising the painter with the noble boy's features. And the Frenchman found himself liking his new subject with a handsome face shaped by soft youthful lines and curves with little hints of the man he would become. There were also the expressive pair of eyes glinting in an abundance of allurement, and at the same time a certain lack of kind, which only served to bemuse him.

After he had created six different sketches, he presented those to the eager looking Eren.

"It's almost like a photograph. You're very talented, monsieur." Eren smiled and flipped the sheets of paper.

"You are too kind." He did not think much of a nobleman's compliment, though he was glad, at least, as it would mean less trouble for the whole process.

"Though…"

Or maybe not.

"Though?"

"Don't get me wrong, monsieur, but don't you think these look...mundane?"

Gustave Courbet was intrigued. He eyed Eren with mild interest. "Is there anything you would like to suggest, young lord?"

The experienced painter should have known, the little smile could not be the herald of something ordinary.

"Monsieur Courbet? What is your opinion on nudes?"

Eren loosened his tie.

* * *

 

The next day when the sun was at its peak, Levi took a stroll under the pleasantly cool shadows of foliage. He could only work for so long until his backside would start to ache. Some change of scene, a recharge of fresh air, and scents that were not ink and paper did wonders to him.

Often, the castle's garden would remind him of childhood.

A distant memory of two children chasing a dog. He was about to be scolded by his mother but he could not remember that part very well, only that the little girl's hair was catching the sunlight.

He was just a boy, his father was the Fürst, his mother was alive, and the girl's hair was long.

These days those memories were rare. Whenever he walked the pebbled paths of St Emmeram's gardens, Eren crossed his mind.

Eren studying the plants with one of his teachers. Eren reading the book his beloved friend Armin had gifted him right next to the fountain. Eren's hair catching the sunlight.

Levi pinched the bridge of his nose in an attempt to rid himself of any more daydreaming. It was probably to be seen as a sign to go back to work.

He rounded the corner, walking in the direction of one of the many side entrances, already thinking about the third pile of documents, when he idly turned his head, finding that he was looking through a window into the makeshift atelier. He stopped in his track.

First thing that caught his eye was of course the artist sitting by the window with his hunched back facing Levi. Aged fingers glided across the still mostly empty canvas in first imaginary strokes before placing the graphite tip on the surface of the plain-woven fabric. Curious, Levi shifted to get a glimpse of Eren.

What he got was not just a glimpse but the most of Eren he had ever seen before.

A long Roman styled chair, a chaise longue, had been moved into the atelier. On it was his brother, reclining with one arm leisurely propped at the edge of the raised headboard while the other arm lay in a resting position just above his covered groin. He was completely bare if not for the white cloth covering his bottom half. The long fabric clung to Eren's thighs, and the drapes fell in folds that gathered at the feet of the furniture.

The midday sun bathed the boy's golden skin in natural light as if to present her beloved son. And Levi took in the sight of so much naked skin, of the dips and curves just like the ancient statues of marble, though not cool and colourless, but vibrant, soft to the touch, and slightly flushed from so much life.

Eren appeared to be far off; his gaze directed at nothing in particular after a long time of posing yet he kept his horizontal position without fail.

Slowly, Levi touched the windowpane separating him and the room. The appropriate course of action was to immediately stop the painting session because the painting currently in the making was a scandal.

It was no longer the portrait of a noble son. It was Venus.

And unapologetically erotic.

Levi, though, could not move at all. He was frozen in place, and enthralled by the one person he desired the most, now bare and tearing at his resolve.

Really, he should just kick the French painter out.

Instead, he returned to stand on the same spot the next day, and drank in the image of his brother. At first he thought he could get used to it, and that indulging himself would help him get over his unorthodox infatuation. What happened was, he became addicted. His eyes hungered, his tongue felt dry, his body burnt.

On the days of secretly observing the painting process, Levi grew to know the work of art on an intimate level. As it slowly came to life one paint stroke at a time, he became more familiar with Gustave Courbet's style and thought process.

The painting showed an egalitarian surface, in which the colours were spread out across the canvas without regard to the objects or spatial depth. That way the prevalent objects were levelled in their dominance, and nothing stood above or submissive to the other. It was a very unique and new way of painting; very different from the artist's contemporary colleagues.

And so Eren was slowly captured and immortalised on a canvas.

The Fürst thought he'd had enough of voyeurism for the day. He sighed and ran his fingers through his hair.

In the middle of exhaling and letting his eyes blink open, he caught Eren's piercing gaze.

Maybe Levi's heart stopped. At this point he could no longer tell for sure as he was even incapable of moving, and thus frozen mid touching his hair.

But Eren did not react the same way, on the contrary. Somehow still keeping his relaxed pose, he let his gaze roam Levi's body up and down, and the elder felt naked too. The looks on him felt like caresses, and he could not help but shudder and be small under their mercy.

Levi swallowed hard, tugged his cravat loose, and shrugged his dark suit jacket off. Then disappeared from sight.

* * *

 

Gustave Courbet stood from his stool with a groan. The man stretched and massaged his stiff back, then grimaced at the pain caused by his abrupt movements.

"Don't tell me it's already break time for you, monsieur." Eren only allowed himself to shift slightly.

"I admire your endurance, my lord. Sitters usually complain whenever I lose myself in painting but you've barely moved, and I have to capitulate first. It's been like this for days."

Eren shrugged. "I don't like doing half hearted work."

The Frenchman laughed heartily, before shaking his head and making his way towards the door to get some much needed break. Eren was left alone in the room. He could not be bothered to lay himself in a more comfortable position. Still he was looking at the now empty spot on the other side of the window where he had caught his brother looking like a burglar.

Actually, he had noticed him earlier today, and somehow he had a feeling that it was not Levi's first time standing there looking at him, at his naked skin.

* * *

 

"Ah, Mr Courbet is in the small dining room this very moment, Your Highness. You won't find him there," the majordomo said. He had been on his way to inspect the kitchen staff when he spotted the Fürst standing in front of the atelier.

"Is that so?" His master asked distractedly. "Then please tell him to take his time on his break. Surely, he is exhausted."

The majordomo bowed obediently, and did not straighten himself back up until the Fürst had pushed the door to the atelier open and entered it.

* * *

 

Levi closed the door behind him as soundlessly as possible. Loosening the grip around the door handle, he side eyed the boy who was still reclining on the chaise longue. He then lingered there, just observing what was now laid out in front of him.

That boy, Levi was sure he had long heard him enter. And yet he made no move to stir, and chose to remain like that, flaunting his bare back at him. The curve of his spine called to be touched and traced.

Levi devoured the boy with his silver eyes, raking them all across the exposed back whilst subtly biting his lip. The white cloth draped over the hip granted him the tiniest teasing glimpse of cleft.

Eren looked so...ravishable.

The Fürst pushed himself off the door, and slowly strode to the middle of the room. The clicking of his heels reverberated in clear echoes as he drew closer.

His breathing was controlled but deep, almost as if he would dive after each intake of breath.

Right behind Eren, Levi came to a halt. He buried his right hand in the pocket of his trousers, then tilted his head in contemplation. He observed the other like one would a sculpture at an exhibition—silently and thoroughly.

The other hand reached up, at first hesitantly, to rest right there where the white fabric began. Levi battled against the temptation but he himself knew best that he was barely trying. After realising that perhaps he had thought of Eren as more than just a brother for longer than he dared to admit, that he had defiled any sacred sibling love between them, he could only feel disgust.

And yet his desire was strong.

Languidly, he let his fingertips glide past the fabric onto the exposed skin. They caressed Eren's side lovingly, longingly. Levi's mind was overflowing with thoughts of _finally_ ; and he almost let his eyes fall shut in blissful reverie.

Meanwhile, Eren was watching the hand slide up his side to his shoulder from the corners of his eyes. He had to suppress a violent shiver from being touched in such a lust inducing way.

Levi's hand rubbed across the brother's throat, then massaged the curve of his jaw. Eren could see the looming shadow grow, and the upholstery dipped under the weight of Levi's knee propping itself there.

Their heartbeats were in sync, they knew.

A slight tug led Eren to finally turn his head, and Levi tilted the boy's chin, so he had a clear view of his face. Only then did his brother look up at him with those eyes the shape of innocence and the language of seduction.

Eren found Levi already leaning above him, the other arm braced against the headboard, caging him; and his face was close, so close. Grey eyes searched him, took him apart, engulfed him fully in their power. Eren licked his lips, making them moist and ready.

He heard a short intake of breath. And then his lips were claimed by his brother, beloved brother.

Over and over again Eren had dreamt of such a kiss but it had never been this starved.

Two strong hands cupped his face, pulled him closer to deepen the kiss. Eren opened his mouth because it felt like the right thing to do, and then gasped as Levi's tongue thrust in right away. Instinctively, Eren's own tongue pushed against the other's, but oh it made his whole body tremble.

The younger brother whimpered at the tingling sensations spreading right underneath his skin. It was so overpowering that he could no longer support himself so expertly like before. His arms encircled Levi's neck as a last resort for purchase.

Their lips parted with a wet sound. Harsh breathing filled the small distance between them. Above Eren, Levi was a beautiful mess. His fringe fell in his face in disarray and clung to his brow, his eyes were dark and dangerous somehow.

Eren bit his lower lip at the sight and leant up for another kiss. But he was stopped before they could reconnect.

"Do you enjoy torturing me, Eren?" Levi growled, and his voice sounded rough and delicious. "Do not test me. Ever."

It was maddening enough to know that if he were to simply push the white cloth off, his brother would be completely exposed before him.

"I want you to kiss me. All of me." Eren sat up, and the fabric slid down to his lap.

Levi, suddenly feeling guilty, made sure to keep Eren covered. He looked pained beyond measure. The little brother's close proximity made him want to lose his mind.

"I'm your brother!" Levi had raised his voice.

Eren answered in kind, "I know!"

"Then please," pleaded the other in an almost whisper, "Understand that I do not want to lose my family."

Eren had a thought that desperately asked why they could not kiss with tongue and at the same time be brothers.

Levi hastily stood straight before he would lose control of himself yet again. He cleared his throat, and regained his impassive expression. "It's of course obvious that you can't have this kind of portrait. So make sure to tell monsieur Courbet to change it before I drop his commission."

One last longing glance at the expanse of Eren's naked skin, and he fled the room.

* * *

 

When Gustave Courbet returned, everything was wrong.

The pose was way off, the cloth rumpled, the expression a completely different one. He could not have that, especially since he had been working on the painted subject's face.

The boy in front of him was no longer the godly muse he had been painting.

With a sigh, the artist grabbed the canvas from the easel, and set the half finished painting aside to be abandoned.

Eren blinked and tugged the cover close to his chest.

"I can't work on this one any longer," Courbet explained. "Please allow me to start a new one."

Eren sighed, relieved. "Thank God, I didn't have to say it myself. Sure, just tell me what pose to take."

* * *

 

Two weeks had passed since the unspeakable incident between Eren and Levi had happened. And to Levi's surprise, Eren had not tried to bring it up again. In fact, he too appeared to be avoiding the subject altogether. Which was a relief.

Or so Levi tried to convince himself despite the empty feeling the distance between him and his brother brought, now that he had tasted Eren's lips.

The memory of the kiss made him run his thumb and tongue over his own lips, but he only tasted the bitter residue of red wine.

It made him realise that he might have been a little bit tipsy, which was odd since he was usually a moderate drinker. Yet to be fair, today's company had been awful.

Hanji Zoe had gone all the way to send out formal invitations for a dinner party at her villa, and Levi's majordomo had insistently talked to him about how declining such an invitation was rude and unbecoming of a Fürst and good friend. So attend he did.

Surprisingly, the evening had started off not too badly, what with Hanji Zoe being the hostess, and inescapably busy with keeping all the other guests occupied. And thus it had been just him and his glass of vintage, and then the occasional obligatory small talk.

Until Erwin Smith decided to breeze in, boring him with political talk no sane man could make sense of. In order to survive the night, Levi had downed his glass in one swift motion, and called for a footman to pour him some more. The rest of the evening had proceeded in kind.

Now back at his own castle, Levi could not wait to become one with his bed. The majordomo in tow kept a respectful distance, and was gracious enough to spare him from any talk about incoming work.

As usual, his fast stride slowed the moment he got close to Eren's room. It was probably too late for a goodnight visit, and he had told Eren not to wait for him. But curiously enough, he found the door slightly ajar.

"The prince is not asleep yet?"

"The prince has already had his evening wash as well as his nightly glass of hot milk. However, he had informed me that he would not yet retire for the night." The majordomo flatly replied.

Bewildered, Levi stared at the door, then raised his hand to dismiss his servant for the night. The majordomo bowed and retreated with a wish for a pleasant night. And Levi pushed the door open.

The only light source were the candles placed on top of the nightstand, and they dipped the space around the bed in warm flickering light.

Sitting on the edge of the bed was Eren, already clad in his nightgown. He was facing an easel to his front. It carried a golden framed painting the span of two outstretched arms. Eren appeared to have been transfixed by it for a long time; he did not even hear Levi enter the room.

"You never told me the painting was completed," Levi said, cutting through the silence.

Jumping slightly, Eren grabbed his chest, and darted his eyes towards the intruder. Relief washed over his face once he recognised his brother.

"That's because it's still brand new. Mr Courbet finished the painting this afternoon after adding the final touches." Levi noted the nervousness in Eren's voice.

"I can't wait to see it. I'll probably hang it in my study." Levi paced forward, curious to see the first painting under his commission.

Eren shot up and blocked his way. He looked panicked somehow. "Hanging it in your study isn't a great idea, Levi."

That made the other raise his eyebrows in question. "Don't tell me it's ugly, because I swear to God I'll make sure to tarnish that goddamned Frenchman's good name for the rest of eternity."

The threat made Eren chuckle nervously, and he turned to fidget with the hem of his sleeve. Something was definitely off, and Levi would make sure to find out what exactly.

He grabbed his brother's shoulder and shoved him out of his way, ignoring Eren's exasperated groan. Once there, he spun on his heel, and straight on stared at the painting with crossed arms.

The Fürst's eyes widened, and his arms dropped wordlessly. All breath was taken from him.

The still wet oil on canvas painting did not depict a standard portrait of his brother nor did it show a finished version of the first painting.

It was worse.

No longer did the sun shine on Eren's skin. It now glowed in pale moonshine, highlighting the figure from the otherwise dark surrounding, so that he appeared to be radiating in an eerie light.

Eren was not reclining anymore, instead he was draped over the chaise longue with his head and part of his upper body hanging down over the edge, exposing his long neck. His arms hung loosely over his shoulders, touching the ground.

Levi swallowed as he took in all the sinful details of flushed skin, of rosy buds painted on Eren's chest with a penchant for realism. His gaze traveled south across the smooth expanse of Eren's stomach, and he realised that the white cloth, now no longer thick and heavy but thin and almost translucent, was draped lower around his hips.

What drew him in, however, was Eren's face. His eyes were on the beholder, beckoning, whispering. His lips were just-bitten red, slightly parted, and they caught the light, making them look moist. As if...as if they had just been kissed.

Levi covered his mouth with the back of his hand the moment he understood. Gustave Courbet had captured the image of Eren as he had been right after they had shared the kiss.

"He named the painting La Chute. The Fall." Eren's voice sounded distant in Levi's ears. and he slumped down. The bed creaked under his weight. He was still staring at the painting.

"Why did you let him paint this? This is not what I commissioned."

Eren sat next to him. "He said that he would understand if you decided not to pay him but he could not paint me any other way. Any other way would be a lie, he said, and he does not paint lies."

Levi tilted his head slightly towards Eren but his eyes were lowered to the ground. Only his deep frown was visible. "And why did you agree to pose like that?"

"Because I wanted you to see me." Levi looked up, and their eyes met. And Levi felt the heat again, and maybe it was the alcohol, but definitely, it was the overflowing feelings threatening to break through. "I wanted you to see how you've transformed me. I wanted you to see what's under the fine silk and suits you like to dress me in."

Levi stood abruptly. Eren thought he saw the other stumble in his haste. He rounded the bed until he reached the other nightstand, and grabbed a crystal decanter filled with red wine. He poured a generous amount to Eren's unused glass, then chugged the content without much finesse.

"Am I the only one trying to save us from doing something that is utterly wrong?" Levi could not taste the wine at all. And so he poured some more.

Eren climbed the bed and crawled to the other side. He reached up to place a soothing hand around Levi's wrist.

"Am I the only one harbouring these feelings?" Eren asked.

Levi's gaze dropped to the hand touching him, then moved to regard his brother. He placed his full glass back on the nightstand. "You know exactly how I feel, Eren."

The grasp around his wrist tightened; then he felt a tug. It was not forceful but Levi let it lead him. And when he climbed Eren's bed, he did so with full awareness. Likewise the tentative caress on his brother's cheek, and the careful touch of their foreheads.

Eren's eyes searched Levi's. It was difficult to keep a focused look at such close proximity, nevertheless he did not want to miss it. His nose nuzzled the other's, and it was a loving gesture. Levi's breath carried the scent of red wine as it mingled in the barely there distance between them.

"Kiss me again," Eren said in a low whisper.

And Levi did kiss him. 

A kiss filled with uncertainty and bleeding guilt.

Eren's state of mind was no different, though he was too overcome by the intoxication that was Levi's kiss.

A bit shy but willing to be bold, Eren sucked on Levi's lower lip. It had the desired effect, because he could feel the tip of the other's tongue prying his mouth open. Eren was eager to let him in. The hot tongue roaming inside, pushing against his own, really made Eren's body react. Pleasure wrecked him from head to toe that he could not help the little moan from spilling.

It was embarrassing to let out such a shameful noise, however, it only served to entice Levi even more.

"God, you're gorgeous," growled Levi between hungry kisses, and each time he would pull on Eren's hair to appraise his handiwork as the younger's expression turned ever more lost, "You don't know what you do to me. Since the beginning you've made me your jealous slave. I didn't want anybody close to you."

Eren could only listen but not say. His mind was too clouded to form proper sentences. Blindly, his hands grabbed for Levi's lapels, and pushed the pristine suit off of his broad shoulders.

Even when the ravishing mouth had wandered off to latch onto Eren's neck, shaking his body with sensation the younger found he liked even more, he never ceased to undress Levi little by little. The collar was loose and open, thus Eren wasted no time to let his hand sneak underneath.

Realising that he would soon be too distracted to take care of Levi's wardrobe, he shook the older brother off, who only parted with words of protests. He curled his fingers around the golden buttons of Levi's waistcoat, then popped them open. The garment then hung loose around the godly frame he so desired.

Next he tugged the white shirt out of Levi's trousers, as he did so he did not fail to notice the predatory eyes on him. Though any predators had to wait, for he was going to savour this; the taut skin that was revealed under so many layers of immaculate clothing. Levi chose to spread his legs that very moment.

Eren couldn't take it anymore, and climbed in his lap. This time he was the one to initiate the kiss. It was fervent, messy, and loud. Large hands grabbed him by the waist and pulled him closer. Helplessly trapped in the other's grasps, Eren's only course of action was to roll his hips, then grind down between Levi's legs.

That was like magic. His older brother threw his head back, eyes shut, lips parted, letting out a delicious moan. Taking advantage of the outstretched neck, Eren attacked it with his lips. At the same time, he looped his thumbs underneath the white shirt, and pushed it down, the dark waistcoat along with it. He admired Levi's arms with his touch, and discovered that he could not even nearly clasp his hand around those biceps.

"I always thought I was quite strong, but I think you could hold me down and I would be under your mercy." Eren stroked the firm arm.

Levi rubbed Eren's still clothed backside. "Do you want me to hold you down?"

"I would let you do many things," Eren promised. "For example…"

Eren's thumb rubbed the back of Levi's hand. Eventually, he led it to slide underneath the hem of his nightgown until it met his naked thigh. Levi bit his lip as he could not see, only touch. It felt smooth and warm. Eren's hand led his up higher, and the more he traveled north, the garment rode up along, revealing the legs that had already messed with his head before. His palm rubbed against his brother's groin, and a tug guided him further until— Eren moaned, his cheeks were flushed in a red tint.

"Here?" Levi palmed the half hard cock, and probably would have spent a moment to internalise that he was not raised to pleasure other men if not for the fact that it had been nullified by first grade incest. In that moment he could not care less. He simply wanted Eren to come undone beneath him, above him, it did not matter.

Eren scooted closer, wrapped his arms around Levi's neck, and nodded. Languidly, he began to thrust his hips forward for more friction. "Uhuh, right there. You could rub me there or even lick, ah and then milk me." He threw his head back, praising his older brother for the faster pace.

Levi unlaced the loose-fitting nightgown, pushed the neckline down on one shoulder, and kissed the exposed collarbone, leaving marks that would remain well into the next morning. Whenever Eren's filthy mouth would rile him up too much, he would bite down on the delicate skin.

Eren had a good time in his lap, just grinding, bouncing however it pleased him, but Levi wanted to see more. So, he grabbed the younger by the waist, and flipped their position. Eren blinked as he felt the mattress on his back, and was now looking up at Levi. Though he would not say he was complaining, because Levi was now undoing his trousers.

Feeling extra naughty, Eren lifted one leg to teasingly rub one foot against the straining bulge.

"Ahh fuck, Eren. Don't do that!" Levi groaned but pressed against the heel.

"Language, Your Highness," Eren giggled.

At the sight of Levi's freed cock, however, Eren swallowed his laughter. He had fantasised about his brother's cock in different sizes, some had pretty unrealistic proportions, but having the real thing hard, pulsing, and ready in front of him made him wonder whether it was going to fit at all. Be it in his mouth or in his ass. Nevertheless, he had never wanted anything this much.

When Levi lowered himself to kiss him hard in the mouth, his hands spreading Eren's legs wide, his cock dragged against the fabric of the thin sleeping garment. Eren could feel it through the barrier of cloth, and it made him moan out loud, because he wanted it so badly. Would Levi look at him weirdly if he knew how starved over his cock his little brother was?

Levi devoured his neck with licks and kisses, and when he was facing the clothed chest, he leaned down to suck on the hardened nipples through the fabric. Eren let out a surprised moan, arching his back.

"It's just like the painting suggested. They're like ripe fruits ready to be consumed." Levi rolled one nipple under the tip of his finger, taking in the sight of Eren trembling and making sound under his touch, as if he was playing the other like an instrument.

"Yes...please...Levi—"

Softly, Levi cupped his brother's face. "What is it?"

Eren's expression was pleading but Levi knew that to him, everything would be a command. "I need more. Please, I've been craving this!"

That was all Levi needed to hear.

Gently, he caressed Eren's temple, who had noticed the shift in his brother's mood.

"Levi…" Eren pulled Levi's face close to him, then placed a chaste kiss on his forehead. "Please make me yours."

Levi nodded. They could not turn back and pretend like nothing had happened.

Just one thing was on his mind...

"How...do I do this anyway?"

Eren had forgotten that Levi probably never really had to think about boys fucking other boys unlike him. Spreading his legs some more, and lifting his hips off the bed, he pointed between his legs. "Basically, you put it...you know...here."

"In your ass?" Well, Levi figured out that much. "So, I just push in? Will it hurt?"

His brother only shrugged. "I've only ever used my fingers."

"You've used your fingers?"

"Yes. I recently tried three. The fantasies of you taking me were really vivid that night." Eren smirked.

And Levi felt he was about to burst. The mental image of his brother shoving three fingers up his ass, moaning his name till he reached completion, aroused him even more.

"I also recently discovered that using something like cold cream makes it easier. I've tried it dry or with spit before, though."

"We pick the easier way," Levi instantly decided.

"Alright. Wait a second." Rolling on his stomach, Eren tried to push his own body forward, so he could reach the drawer of the nightstand where he had left the cold cream from his last nightly fun.

At the same time, Levi was rewarded with the incredible sight of Eren's admittedly very shapely ass. Letting out a low purr of satisfaction, Levi wrapped his arms around Eren's stomach, and pulled him flush against him. The neckline had slipped so low, all of the other's shoulders were exposed. And so, he trailed sensual kisses all over them, then along his spine, and shoulder blades, earning himself drawn out moans.

Now it was Levi's turn to moan after Eren had decided to pushed back, grinding against Levi's cock.

"I can't wait to have you in me, Levi. You'll give me what I want, right?" Moaned Eren. He dipped his fingers in the small jar of cream.

"Is this what you want?" Levi let his leaking cock slide up and down in between Eren's cleft. "I can go on like this until I spill all over you."

Eren's moan trailed off in a whine. "No. Not like that. I want you to shove your cock in my waiting hole, pound me deep, and fill me up until I'm all wet and dripping." Shakily, he reached behind to rub against his own entrance with slick fingers.

Levi could not believe the lewd words spilling from his brother's lips, and how hot and ready they made him feel. Leaning forward, he smacked Eren's hand away, ignoring the loud protest. He himself dipped his fingers in the cold cream, then pressed against the entrance. At first, he wanted to start off with two, then found out that it was too ambitious to do so, and pushed one finger in. It went in surprisingly well as Eren knew how to relax his muscles.

"Are you well, Eren?"

His brother nodded. "You can go in deeper and then add another finger...yesss just like that. You're so good, Levi."

Levi thought he really wanted to see Eren's face. Following his heart's desire, he flipped him on his back, so they were facing one another again. He leaned in for a deep kiss, and reinserted his fingers. He pushed in deeper, scissoring and curling the digits in an attempt to stretch Eren.

A delighted outcry made him thrust in harder, add in a third finger that stretched the walls for him.

"Please, I want you. Come on, you're so good to me." Eren's breathless encouragement and soothing caresses were like spells that made him obey.

Coating his arousal in that cream, he watched Eren spread his legs for him. For a moment he thought the voiceless words mouthed at him meant _brother_ , but he dismissed the thought just as quickly.

Inside of Eren was a heat that engulfed him in a fire of lust, setting his body and mind ablaze, until the only thing left for him to coherently utter was the name carried by a long drawn out moan.

Eren's eyes fluttered shut, and he smiled at the feeling of being so full and stretched by his brother. He knew Levi was watching him intently, watching him be this shameless, but Eren wanted him to see. That the child was also an adult.

Levi grabbed Eren's thigh and thrust into him out of need until he bottomed out. He set a slow pace to get himself used to the tightness, the friction that was just too good, he feared he might lose himself.

"God yes, Eren, you feel so good."

Eren grabbed the bedsheets, and moaned as Levi's cock kept drilling into him, kept filling him over and over again. "Harder. Please fuck me harder."

Who was Levi to deny Eren's every wish? The hold on the younger's leg and waist grew tighter, and they were sure to bruise come morning, though the pleasure overshadowed all pain.

Eren rotated his hips, and met Levi's thrusts willingly. He had been hitting that wonderful spot repeatedly, and Eren was close to losing his mind. He could barely keep his mouth closed or swallow his spit. Saliva trickled down the corner of his mouth, and the only thing Eren could do was hang on and enjoy the ride. Oh but what a ride it was.

Levi stared down transfixed as he fucked his brother hard. His cock was about to spill and fill that tight hole with his seed, and during that moment he could not tear his gaze away from the being that embraced him.

He had him there, his brother, his own flesh and blood, open for him. Just like a painting you keep hidden from the public eye, and yet far more beautiful and terrible, for he was real, never to be under your control, the living sign of your sin. But as he beheld Eren, he could not find any fault in his actions. Because he really did not mean his brother any harm. He wanted to protect him, to be protected by him, to carry on with life at his gentle side, to hold him dear as long as God and Time would let them. So, how could his love towards Eren be filthy?

And Eren, his body driven by the hard thrusts to almost dangle over the edge of his bed, thought of their first meeting, their first affectionate touch, their first trip, their first separation, and their first reunion. And when Levi grabbed for his neglected cock, Eren thought of Isolde, and understood her feelings of drowning, foundering, of being unconscious, of utmost rapture.

Thrusts growing erratic bordering on desperate, Levi grabbed Eren's hand, intertwined it with his own, and flipped it over the other's head. In their passion, their hands knocked the crystal glass off of the nightstand, spilling red wine over their arms. It crashed to the ground where it broke in thousand glittering splinters.

When the rocking of his older brother stuttered, Eren wrapped his legs around him, pushed him deep, kept him buried. With a loud groan, Levi released in him, filled him to the brim, filled him so good. And Eren felt complete. His own cum splattered on his spotlessly white nightgown.

If this was what sin felt like, they did not believe in its existence. 

Even after they had both come, Eren could still feel the ghost of Levi's pounding. His brother too was not yet back from his high. But a lazy kiss delivered the message of shared bliss.

Exhausted, they remained like that until sleep took them both.

The red liquid trickled down their linked arms— and the thick droplets of wine falling from their entwined hands to the ground looked like blood.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so goddamned nervous, I hope I did not disappoint. But after over a year it was probably time for candy. 
> 
> Happy Footnotes:  
> • **Consanguinity:** Blood relation  
>  • **Majordomo:** Highest person in a household's staff; pretty much the butler of a large residence.  
>  • **Bavarian Eastern Railway Company:** Was really co-founded by the 6th Fürst of Thurn und Taxis.  
>  • **[Almanach de Gotha](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Almanach_de_gotha)**  
>  •If you want to read more on **[Royal Intermarriage](http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Royal_intermarriage)**  
>  • **[Gustave Courbet](http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gustave_Courbet)** was a French realist painter. He inspired many young painter who would later define Impressionism and Cubism among other things. Technically, he couldn't have been in Regensburg to paint Eren as he was imprisoned for 6 months during the second half of 1871 but I wanted it to be him because of his style and notoriety as an artist who had released a series of nudes that differed from the classical convention. See paintings such as _L'Origine du monde_ and _Le Sommeil_  
>  Thanks for reading, commenting, and leaving kudos ^q^ I'm so scared of this chapter. See you next time (hopefully, if you want TTuTT)

**Author's Note:**

> Curious about Levi's look? Check it out, I drew him for this fic [HERE](http://the-kingy.tumblr.com/post/61612039336/an-eternal-mystery-ereri-fic)  
> Ah, I hope the actual 7th Prince of Thurn and Taxis Maximilian Maria isn't turning in his grave, because I replaced him with Levi. Ahahahaha. Fuck it.  
> Hope you liked this :P


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